(17550,5121,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/Cant-Be-Friends.png\",\"id\":5028,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-480,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"\\\"No, we can\'t be friends\\\": 12 Things Your Therapist Wants You To Know\",\"description_text\":\"3 June 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Ever wondered what your\\u00a0therapist\\u00a0is\\u00a0really\\u00a0thinking? Oh, phew! So it\'s not just us.<\\/p><p>It\'s a funny old thing, therapy. Not\\u00a0funny, funny - but you know we mean. Because more often than not, you don\'t really know what to expect if you\'ve never been before, right?<\\/p><p>Will it be like the movies? Will they show you those pictures of dark splotches and ask you what you see? Will they go home have a big gossip with their partner about all your secrets?? Omg, WILL THEY?<\\/p><p>The good news: Chances are, your therapist is nothing like what you\'ll see in movies and TV shows. Really!<\\/p><p>In fact, they\'re probably more like you than you might think.<\\/p><p>Watch: These signs will help you know if you should see a psychologist.<\\/p><p>And here\'s the thing - while it\'s always good to be able to\\u00a0seek out\\u00a0help from those around you, like your family and friends, sometimes you just need to chat with someone from outside of your circle. Someone who is like a blank sheet of paper.<\\/p><p>Below, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0to tell us everything she wants you to know about therapy..<\\/p><p>Take a seat.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. We understand that you may feel daunted or frightened about starting therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Sharing really intimate details about your life, your\\u00a0relationships\\u00a0and some of your\\u00a0deepest secrets\\u00a0to a complete stranger can feel super scary and daunting. Therapists get it.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most people come to therapy because they need it. This doesn\\u2019t mean that they want to go. And I can tell you, no one starts therapy for fun\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even though in my consulting room we have some fun,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that\\u00a0it can take time for some clients to feel safe in the space and that\\u2019s absolutely fine. You will feel safe when you feel safe and feel free to\\u00a0talk about this with your therapist.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. There\'s no experience needed\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Going to your first therapy session and nervous that you won\'t know what you need to... do or say? Don\'t worry - Abrahams said this is a really common feeling.<\\/p><p>\\\"Some people worry that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t know what to do in therapy and they may not be \\u201cgetting it right\\u201d as a client. Let me tell you now - there is no \'getting it right\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"All you need to do is bring yourself in - just as you are, no experience needed.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. We\\u2019ve seen it all\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Spoiler! While you might think you just have\\u00a0too much stuff,\\u00a0chances are your therapist has seen it all before. Your past behaviours, relationship struggles, life concerns - the whole shebang. Ten times over.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"So many people come to therapy worried that their therapist won\\u2019t be able to handle them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0that they\\u2019ll be too much,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though every client is unique and brings a different flavour to the therapy, an experienced therapist generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t be fazed by what you\\u2019re presenting with to have treated.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This doesn\\u2019t mean we don\\u2019t care or that we\\u2019re going through the motions\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we\\u2019re not. It\\u2019s that you\\u2019re unlikely to be shocking to us\\u00a0in any way.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, know that you\'re not \'too difficult\' to work with. The right therapist is out there for you.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. We understand fight-or-flight reactions\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Heard of a fight-or-flight response? It\'s basically a knee-jerk reaction to a past experience or event that you might perceive as stressful or frightening. Your pulse might start racing. Your breathing gets quicker. You feel tense. Uncomfortable.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>It\'s kind of like a psychological defence mechanism.<\\/p><p>\\\"We understand that\\u00a0you can have reactions to people and situations that trigger your fight-or-flight responses. Sometimes you may react as if you are being chased by a hungry bear,\\\" explains Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Your body has a cascading reaction where your adrenaline and cortisol levels surge, and your heart rate and blood pressure increase.\\\"<\\/p><p>While it can be scary, it\'s important to know that this is totally normal, and an experienced therapist will help you navigate the situation.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that in this mode, you may say or do things that may seem extreme. We help you understand these.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Your history matters\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most important things therapists want patients to understand is just how crucial it is to explore past and present experiences - even if you might not feel like it\'s relevant to why you\'re seeking help.<\\/p><p>\\\"Any good therapist understands that your history shapes everything about you. This includes the stories you tell yourself, your beliefs, values, expectations, how you relate to yourself and others, what makes you upset, fearful, or angry, and so much more.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Therapists understand that you\\u2019ve been consciously and unconsciously programmed from forces outside of your control\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we all have. They\\u2019ll work with you to understand how your programming is alive and kicking inside of you today and how your ego operates accordingly.\\\"<\\/p><p>Sometimes this can be incredibly tough and uncomfortable for people, especially when you\'ve experienced hurt in the past. So, be patient with yourself.<\\/p><p>\\\"Many of our clients have experienced childhood trauma and we help them understand how this impacts the way they function in their day-to-day lives.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Most parents do their best\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Fact: Blaming your parents for everything is not the goal here. Abrahams said it\'s about helping clients realise the reality that their parents may have done the best they can, and at the same time\\u00a0may have hurt you in ways you now struggle with.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most therapists understand that\\u00a0parents do their best. This doesn\\u2019t mean they always supported, cared or kept you safe. But most parents do their best, even though they have limitations and shortcomings. Therapy is not about blaming parents.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"Most parents are just operating from the program they received from their conscious and unconscious experiences. It\\u2019s important to understand how the limitations affected you and shaped you, yet to also understand most parents don\\u2019t try to\\u00a0hurt their children. They\\u2019re often preoccupied, stressed, and exhausted.\\\"<\\/p><p>The goal is to try to\\u00a0navigate the life you\'ve been given - because at the end of the day,\\u00a0you\'re the only one who can change it.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. We\'re non-judgemental\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said any good therapist will never judge their client - even when you feel like they\'re doing more listening than talking.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you ever do feel judged by your therapist, she said this is something you should bring up with them - it might seem really uncomfortable at first, but it\'s extremely important you voice your feelings.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists are non-judgemental therapists. How is a judgemental therapist helpful? Actually, they\\u2019re harmful. If your therapist is, call them out on it or find someone else who isn\\u2019t judgemental,\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"Our position is to help you understand how you operate and we do this alongside you\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not towering above you on a pedestal.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Your therapist is a mere mortal, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep, therapists are real people. And they\'re not perfect, either.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Clients often feel they need to see their therapist as angelic\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0those who are only good and perfect. Whenever I sense my clients are placing me in the \\u2018perfect\\u2019 bracket, I quickly let them know that there are no halos in my consulting room\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not on their heads and certainly not on mine.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I\\u2019m not perfect and nor is any therapist. We struggle like you do in life. We feel pain, sadness, anger and more. We have our battle scars and life experiences. We\\u2019re all mere mortals, and sometimes we handle life\\u2019s tribulations well, and sometimes we can stuff up royally.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Distress tolerance is everything\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, many clients come to see therapists because they have distress intolerance. This means they haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate upsetting emotions and sit with them.<\\/p><p>\\\"They didn\\u2019t learn this as a child through their\\u00a0parent-child relationship. This means that they suffer because they don\\u2019t understand that this unpleasant feeling inside them will pass.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"It feels catastrophic, and that\\u2019s where they look to the external world to make themselves feel better. This includes shopping, eating, restricting food, gambling, promiscuous sex, turning to drugs\\/alcohol, talking excessively with friends or creating drama.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on to explain that these actions in the outside world never resolve what\\u2019s going on inside - they\'re mere distractions that numb, but don\\u2019t address, what the unpleasant experience was.<\\/p><p>\\\"A good therapist will help you understand this and teach you other ways to tolerate the sensations inside you, such as breathing techniques and mindfulness.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. You leave a mark on our lives, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Any good therapist will truly want the best for you - and their investment in you often goes outside of the time you spend together. So, don\'t think that you\'re just another number.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though you\\u2019re the one who is going through a transformative experience with the therapist, you leave a mark on them, too,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"Our relationships are meaningful and real, and we care deeply about our clients\\u2019 wellbeing.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"I genuinely love my clients and my heart can bleed for them when they suffer and my heart can expand with joy at their development and other wonderful moments.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. No, we can\\u2019t be friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\'s common to develop a close relationship with your therapist, Abrahams said it\'s important to understand that you can\'t be friends with your therapist.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Awks, we know. But it\'s for the best.<\\/p><p>\\\"There are many clients who would like to be friends with their therapist. This shows that a great connection has been made. However, it\\u2019s important though to keep the relationship in the therapy-client space so that clients can always return for top-up sessions.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being friends with your therapist can create what\'s known as a \'conflicting dual relationship\', which is when people are in two very different relationships at the same time - and this presents a number of different challenges.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>So, yeah - it\'s both good and bad news. Don\'t ask your therapist around for dinner, friend.<\\/p><p>\\\"Your therapist holds your history in a particular way that no-one else does\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0besides you. It\\u2019s a special thing you share. You can make more friends of many different varieties, but having someone hold all of that knowledge of you and your work together is valuable and worthy of protection.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I had a client return for sessions yesterday after not seeing him for seven years. Whilst I don\\u2019t remember every detail of our time together, I certainly remember him and his essence. We were both able to pick back up and get back into the work together.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. We have a privileged role\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"Being a therapist is such privileged work, and most therapists take their role and responsibilities seriously.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"We know how transformative the experience of therapy can be and how profoundly it alters lives.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<strong><a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\">what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/a><\\/strong>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"5 Questions Everyone Should Be Able to Answer About Their Partner, According to An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"30 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, what are your deal-breakers?<\\/p><p>It might be feeling certain where you want to live, hobbies you want to pursue, career goals you need to support meeting, or the kind of\\u00a0family you want to have.<\\/p><p>Now, what about your partner? What are their non-negotiables?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s totally normal to disagree on certain things (read: sailing around the world with seven children), having an open and honest conversation with your partner about each other\\u2019s needs and wants in life is crucial in order to make a relationship work.<\\/p><p>And sometimes having an unconformable conversation now \\u2013 everything from\\u00a0what gets your partner in the mood\\u00a0to\\u00a0how many kids they want\\u00a0\\u2013 can save you\\u00a0a whole lotta\\u00a0heartache in the end.<\\/p><p>So, we sat down with relationship therapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her to share some of the most important things you should know about your partner.<\\/p><p>In no particular order \\u2013 and the order will be determined by the age and stage of the couple \\u2013 Abrahams said there are five key things you should be able to answer about your romantic partner.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. How do they deal with stress, sadness, fear, or pain?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most crucial things you should know about your partner is how they deal with painful and upsetting life experiences.<\\/p><p>Establishing how your partner copes with difficult emotions \\u2013 because everyone is different \\u2013 will help you better understand how you\\u2019re able to help each other when stressful things arise.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have differing capacities for how we tolerate upsetting experiences or physical pain. In general, our ability to tolerate these states stems from whether our parents soothed us in childhood,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis soothing, across many aspects in childhood, becomes internalised and forms the basis of learning to tolerate distress as adults. We take this ability to cope into\\u00a0[our] relationship with our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on\\u00a0to say that people who can tolerate these feelings are often able to manage unsettling experiences better and understand that difficulties come and go.<\\/p><p>While they can still become upset, distressed, or feel pain, she said they tend to be able to work things out themselves, or talk to their partner, or seek wise counsel from someone in their community or a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe important thing is that they are not fearful of thinking about these emotional states. They want to understand them so they can recover,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>The other side of it? Those who struggle with difficult emotions.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe big difference for those who can\\u2019t deal with these feelings or pain is that they need to do something in the external world to make the feelings go away.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese solutions are a way of trying to cope with the pain, but they never actually resolve it. Often, they just make things worse.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, you\\u2019re going to want to know if your partner can sit with difficult feelings or not. If not, what do they do?<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they instantly blame you? Block or push back your ideas? Do they become sulky or whiny? Do they isolate themselves from you or become punishing?,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they turn to drugs or alcohol to ease emotional or physical pain? Do they use porn, gamble, or shop excessively to avoid feelings? What about emotional eating or highly rigid restrictions on food?\\u201d<\\/p><p>This is a really important one to be able to\\u00a0answer, as it can\\u00a0harm a relationship when we can\\u2019t manage difficult states inside of ourselves.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. How do they like and not like to be touched physically or sexually?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Partners can have very different views on intimacy \\u2013 like how often sex should happen, and their expectations and fantasies around sexual activity, including touch.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner in a relationship likes to be touched differently. At the beginning of our relationship, we often care a great deal about whether our partner enjoys our touch,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think back to the beginning of your relationship when things were new and exciting. Over time, we might not care quite\\u00a0as much about what our partner likes and doesn\\u2019t like \\u2013 which is a bit sh**ty.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to keep caring because this journey is an ever-changing field,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cOur partner will change across the relationship. We need to understand how they like to be touched physically and sexually at different ages and stages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Do they want children or not?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one? This is important. While you might be fooled into thinking most couples will suss this out early on\\u00a0in a relationship, sometimes it doesn\\u2019t happen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner has their own thoughts about whether they want to be a parent of not. Don\\u2019t make any assumptions that your partner\\u2019s viewpoint. Make sure you ask the question: Do you want children? Yes\\/No,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they say no, don\\u2019t think you will change their mind later. They might, yet more often they won\\u2019t. I\\u2019ve seen many relationships destroyed by this assumption.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you both want children, how many do you both want? There will be problems if your partner wants many more children than you, or vice versa.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Not only is it important to know whether or not you both want children, but you also should also have a broader idea of what happens if it isn\\u2019t possible.<\\/p><p>Struggling to have children can take its toll on any relationship, so you don\\u2019t also want to realise that your partner isn\\u2019t on board with other avenues you\\u2019d be open to, like IVF or adoption. While opinions may change over time, it\\u2019s still important to discuss it early so you know where each of you stand.<\\/p><p>Both want to have children? Cool! The next thing you should know is how your partner would want to raise them \\u2013 because this is just as important.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou also need to see where your partner sits in their assumptions about how raising children works,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWho will potentially pause their career to be the primary carer? You will need to see how well you can navigate these conversations together. The stakes are much higher having these conversations when the child has already entered the world.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. How does your partner relate to money?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Your partner and money. What does that look like?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have a relationship to money,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThis relationship plays itself out based on the stories in our head about money. Is money the root of all evil or does it make the world go round? Our stories can be contradictory, incoherent, and both conscious and unconscious.\\u201d<\\/p><p>You\\u2019ve heard it a million times before, but one thing most experts will agree on is that the greatest thing couples fight over is money. For this reason, Abrahams said it\\u2019s really important to understand your partner so that you can protect your relationship from being spoiled by money issues.<\\/p><p>And there are a lot of different questions you should ask yourself about this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDoes your partner fear not having enough money? Or fear losing money? Or continue to feel shame around being a child who didn\\u2019t have enough money? Do they comment on your spending too much? Do they throw money around and squander it? Or do they restrict your freedom due to a lack of money? Or do they use money to try to\\u00a0control you?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMoney issues can be fraught in relationships. Try to understand how your partner relates to money and the stories they use to describe their relationship with it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Importantly, she also suggests speaking to your partner about their feelings around debt, mortgages, savings, spending, and separate or shared bank accounts.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEnsure you work with them to understand their relationship to money.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Do they have any unfulfilled dreams that they haven\\u2019t shared with you?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Everyone has dreams and desires \\u2013 and they can look totally different for each of us.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome partners have a secret desire for the road they haven\\u2019t taken. It\\u2019s normal to some degree\\u00a0as we always say no to one path when we go down another,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFind out whether there are paths that can be made room for so your partner can have as rich and fulfilling a life as possible. For example, one partner may be desperate to have a stint living overseas.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf this is possible to work into your lives, then see if it can get off the ground. Some of these may be less possible\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0like one partner joining the air force\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0but you can attend air force shows together or watch documentaries or movies together with such themes.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Knowing what these are will give you a good idea of your future together and what works for both of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to ask your partner how important these dreams are to them, and also whether you, as their partner, could help the dreams become a reality.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And there you have it! Some of the most important questions you should be able to answer about your partner.<\\/p><p>How did you go? Did you nail it? Knew you would. You and Jaryd are great together.<\\/p><p><em>For more from Lissy Abrahams, read her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple a happy one<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships, a unit of the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy\\u00a0founded and manages the Sydney-based therapy clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (369886034)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17561,5122,'_thumbnail_id','5008'),(17562,5122,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17563,5122,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17564,5123,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17565,5123,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17566,5123,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17567,5123,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17568,5123,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_369886034-768x512-1.jpg\",\"id\":5008,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-166,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"5 Questions Everyone Should Be Able to Answer About Their Partner, According to An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"30 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, what are your deal-breakers?<\\/p><p>It might be feeling certain where you want to live, hobbies you want to pursue, career goals you need to support meeting, or the kind of\\u00a0family you want to have.<\\/p><p>Now, what about your partner? What are their non-negotiables?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s totally normal to disagree on certain things (read: sailing around the world with seven children), having an open and honest conversation with your partner about each other\\u2019s needs and wants in life is crucial in order to make a relationship work.<\\/p><p>And sometimes having an unconformable conversation now \\u2013 everything from\\u00a0what gets your partner in the mood\\u00a0to\\u00a0how many kids they want\\u00a0\\u2013 can save you\\u00a0a whole lotta\\u00a0heartache in the end.<\\/p><p>So, we sat down with relationship therapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her to share some of the most important things you should know about your partner.<\\/p><p>In no particular order \\u2013 and the order will be determined by the age and stage of the couple \\u2013 Abrahams said there are five key things you should be able to answer about your romantic partner.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. How do they deal with stress, sadness, fear, or pain?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most crucial things you should know about your partner is how they deal with painful and upsetting life experiences.<\\/p><p>Establishing how your partner copes with difficult emotions \\u2013 because everyone is different \\u2013 will help you better understand how you\\u2019re able to help each other when stressful things arise.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have differing capacities for how we tolerate upsetting experiences or physical pain. In general, our ability to tolerate these states stems from whether our parents soothed us in childhood,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis soothing, across many aspects in childhood, becomes internalised and forms the basis of learning to tolerate distress as adults. We take this ability to cope into\\u00a0[our] relationship with our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on\\u00a0to say that people who can tolerate these feelings are often able to manage unsettling experiences better and understand that difficulties come and go.<\\/p><p>While they can still become upset, distressed, or feel pain, she said they tend to be able to work things out themselves, or talk to their partner, or seek wise counsel from someone in their community or a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe important thing is that they are not fearful of thinking about these emotional states. They want to understand them so they can recover,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>The other side of it? Those who struggle with difficult emotions.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe big difference for those who can\\u2019t deal with these feelings or pain is that they need to do something in the external world to make the feelings go away.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese solutions are a way of trying to cope with the pain, but they never actually resolve it. Often, they just make things worse.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, you\\u2019re going to want to know if your partner can sit with difficult feelings or not. If not, what do they do?<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they instantly blame you? Block or push back your ideas? Do they become sulky or whiny? Do they isolate themselves from you or become punishing?,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they turn to drugs or alcohol to ease emotional or physical pain? Do they use porn, gamble, or shop excessively to avoid feelings? What about emotional eating or highly rigid restrictions on food?\\u201d<\\/p><p>This is a really important one to be able to\\u00a0answer, as it can\\u00a0harm a relationship when we can\\u2019t manage difficult states inside of ourselves.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. How do they like and not like to be touched physically or sexually?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Partners can have very different views on intimacy \\u2013 like how often sex should happen, and their expectations and fantasies around sexual activity, including touch.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner in a relationship likes to be touched differently. At the beginning of our relationship, we often care a great deal about whether our partner enjoys our touch,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think back to the beginning of your relationship when things were new and exciting. Over time, we might not care quite\\u00a0as much about what our partner likes and doesn\\u2019t like \\u2013 which is a bit sh**ty.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to keep caring because this journey is an ever-changing field,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cOur partner will change across the relationship. We need to understand how they like to be touched physically and sexually at different ages and stages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Do they want children or not?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one? This is important. While you might be fooled into thinking most couples will suss this out early on\\u00a0in a relationship, sometimes it doesn\\u2019t happen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner has their own thoughts about whether they want to be a parent of not. Don\\u2019t make any assumptions that your partner\\u2019s viewpoint. Make sure you ask the question: Do you want children? Yes\\/No,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they say no, don\\u2019t think you will change their mind later. They might, yet more often they won\\u2019t. I\\u2019ve seen many relationships destroyed by this assumption.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you both want children, how many do you both want? There will be problems if your partner wants many more children than you, or vice versa.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Not only is it important to know whether or not you both want children, but you also should also have a broader idea of what happens if it isn\\u2019t possible.<\\/p><p>Struggling to have children can take its toll on any relationship, so you don\\u2019t also want to realise that your partner isn\\u2019t on board with other avenues you\\u2019d be open to, like IVF or adoption. While opinions may change over time, it\\u2019s still important to discuss it early so you know where each of you stand.<\\/p><p>Both want to have children? Cool! The next thing you should know is how your partner would want to raise them \\u2013 because this is just as important.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou also need to see where your partner sits in their assumptions about how raising children works,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWho will potentially pause their career to be the primary carer? You will need to see how well you can navigate these conversations together. The stakes are much higher having these conversations when the child has already entered the world.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. How does your partner relate to money?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Your partner and money. What does that look like?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have a relationship to money,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThis relationship plays itself out based on the stories in our head about money. Is money the root of all evil or does it make the world go round? Our stories can be contradictory, incoherent, and both conscious and unconscious.\\u201d<\\/p><p>You\\u2019ve heard it a million times before, but one thing most experts will agree on is that the greatest thing couples fight over is money. For this reason, Abrahams said it\\u2019s really important to understand your partner so that you can protect your relationship from being spoiled by money issues.<\\/p><p>And there are a lot of different questions you should ask yourself about this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDoes your partner fear not having enough money? Or fear losing money? Or continue to feel shame around being a child who didn\\u2019t have enough money? Do they comment on your spending too much? Do they throw money around and squander it? Or do they restrict your freedom due to a lack of money? Or do they use money to try to\\u00a0control you?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMoney issues can be fraught in relationships. Try to understand how your partner relates to money and the stories they use to describe their relationship with it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Importantly, she also suggests speaking to your partner about their feelings around debt, mortgages, savings, spending, and separate or shared bank accounts.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEnsure you work with them to understand their relationship to money.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Do they have any unfulfilled dreams that they haven\\u2019t shared with you?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Everyone has dreams and desires \\u2013 and they can look totally different for each of us.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome partners have a secret desire for the road they haven\\u2019t taken. It\\u2019s normal to some degree\\u00a0as we always say no to one path when we go down another,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFind out whether there are paths that can be made room for so your partner can have as rich and fulfilling a life as possible. For example, one partner may be desperate to have a stint living overseas.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf this is possible to work into your lives, then see if it can get off the ground. Some of these may be less possible\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0like one partner joining the air force\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0but you can attend air force shows together or watch documentaries or movies together with such themes.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Knowing what these are will give you a good idea of your future together and what works for both of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to ask your partner how important these dreams are to them, and also whether you, as their partner, could help the dreams become a reality.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And there you have it! Some of the most important questions you should be able to answer about your partner.<\\/p><p>How did you go? Did you nail it? Knew you would. You and Jaryd are great together.<\\/p><p><em>For more from Lissy Abrahams, read her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple a happy one<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships, a unit of the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy\\u00a0founded and manages the Sydney-based therapy clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (369886034)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17569,5123,'_thumbnail_id','5008'),(17570,5123,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17571,5123,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17572,5124,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17573,5124,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17574,5124,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17575,5124,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17576,5124,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_369886034-768x512-1.jpg\",\"id\":5008,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-166,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"5 Questions Everyone Should Be Able to Answer About Their Partner, According to An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"30 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, what are your deal-breakers?<\\/p><p>It might be feeling certain where you want to live, hobbies you want to pursue, career goals you need to support meeting, or the kind of\\u00a0family you want to have.<\\/p><p>Now, what about your partner? What are their non-negotiables?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s totally normal to disagree on certain things (read: sailing around the world with seven children), having an open and honest conversation with your partner about each other\\u2019s needs and wants in life is crucial in order to make a relationship work.<\\/p><p>And sometimes having an unconformable conversation now \\u2013 everything from\\u00a0what gets your partner in the mood\\u00a0to\\u00a0how many kids they want\\u00a0\\u2013 can save you\\u00a0a whole lotta\\u00a0heartache in the end.<\\/p><p>So, we sat down with relationship therapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her to share some of the most important things you should know about your partner.<\\/p><p>In no particular order \\u2013 and the order will be determined by the age and stage of the couple \\u2013 Abrahams said there are five key things you should be able to answer about your romantic partner.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. How do they deal with stress, sadness, fear, or pain?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most crucial things you should know about your partner is how they deal with painful and upsetting life experiences.<\\/p><p>Establishing how your partner copes with difficult emotions \\u2013 because everyone is different \\u2013 will help you better understand how you\\u2019re able to help each other when stressful things arise.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have differing capacities for how we tolerate upsetting experiences or physical pain. In general, our ability to tolerate these states stems from whether our parents soothed us in childhood,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis soothing, across many aspects in childhood, becomes internalised and forms the basis of learning to tolerate distress as adults. We take this ability to cope into\\u00a0[our] relationship with our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on\\u00a0to say that people who can tolerate these feelings are often able to manage unsettling experiences better and understand that difficulties come and go.<\\/p><p>While they can still become upset, distressed, or feel pain, she said they tend to be able to work things out themselves, or talk to their partner, or seek wise counsel from someone in their community or a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe important thing is that they are not fearful of thinking about these emotional states. They want to understand them so they can recover,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>The other side of it? Those who struggle with difficult emotions.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe big difference for those who can\\u2019t deal with these feelings or pain is that they need to do something in the external world to make the feelings go away.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese solutions are a way of trying to cope with the pain, but they never actually resolve it. Often, they just make things worse.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, you\\u2019re going to want to know if your partner can sit with difficult feelings or not. If not, what do they do?<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they instantly blame you? Block or push back your ideas? Do they become sulky or whiny? Do they isolate themselves from you or become punishing?,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDo they turn to drugs or alcohol to ease emotional or physical pain? Do they use porn, gamble, or shop excessively to avoid feelings? What about emotional eating or highly rigid restrictions on food?\\u201d<\\/p><p>This is a really important one to be able to\\u00a0answer, as it can\\u00a0harm a relationship when we can\\u2019t manage difficult states inside of ourselves.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. How do they like and not like to be touched physically or sexually?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Partners can have very different views on intimacy \\u2013 like how often sex should happen, and their expectations and fantasies around sexual activity, including touch.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner in a relationship likes to be touched differently. At the beginning of our relationship, we often care a great deal about whether our partner enjoys our touch,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think back to the beginning of your relationship when things were new and exciting. Over time, we might not care quite\\u00a0as much about what our partner likes and doesn\\u2019t like \\u2013 which is a bit sh**ty.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to keep caring because this journey is an ever-changing field,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cOur partner will change across the relationship. We need to understand how they like to be touched physically and sexually at different ages and stages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Do they want children or not?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one? This is important. While you might be fooled into thinking most couples will suss this out early on\\u00a0in a relationship, sometimes it doesn\\u2019t happen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEach partner has their own thoughts about whether they want to be a parent of not. Don\\u2019t make any assumptions that your partner\\u2019s viewpoint. Make sure you ask the question: Do you want children? Yes\\/No,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they say no, don\\u2019t think you will change their mind later. They might, yet more often they won\\u2019t. I\\u2019ve seen many relationships destroyed by this assumption.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you both want children, how many do you both want? There will be problems if your partner wants many more children than you, or vice versa.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Not only is it important to know whether or not you both want children, but you also should also have a broader idea of what happens if it isn\\u2019t possible.<\\/p><p>Struggling to have children can take its toll on any relationship, so you don\\u2019t also want to realise that your partner isn\\u2019t on board with other avenues you\\u2019d be open to, like IVF or adoption. While opinions may change over time, it\\u2019s still important to discuss it early so you know where each of you stand.<\\/p><p>Both want to have children? Cool! The next thing you should know is how your partner would want to raise them \\u2013 because this is just as important.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou also need to see where your partner sits in their assumptions about how raising children works,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWho will potentially pause their career to be the primary carer? You will need to see how well you can navigate these conversations together. The stakes are much higher having these conversations when the child has already entered the world.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. How does your partner relate to money?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Your partner and money. What does that look like?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have a relationship to money,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThis relationship plays itself out based on the stories in our head about money. Is money the root of all evil or does it make the world go round? Our stories can be contradictory, incoherent, and both conscious and unconscious.\\u201d<\\/p><p>You\\u2019ve heard it a million times before, but one thing most experts will agree on is that the greatest thing couples fight over is money. For this reason, Abrahams said it\\u2019s really important to understand your partner so that you can protect your relationship from being spoiled by money issues.<\\/p><p>And there are a lot of different questions you should ask yourself about this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cDoes your partner fear not having enough money? Or fear losing money? Or continue to feel shame around being a child who didn\\u2019t have enough money? Do they comment on your spending too much? Do they throw money around and squander it? Or do they restrict your freedom due to a lack of money? Or do they use money to try to\\u00a0control you?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMoney issues can be fraught in relationships. Try to understand how your partner relates to money and the stories they use to describe their relationship with it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Importantly, she also suggests speaking to your partner about their feelings around debt, mortgages, savings, spending, and separate or shared bank accounts.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEnsure you work with them to understand their relationship to money.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Do they have any unfulfilled dreams that they haven\\u2019t shared with you?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Everyone has dreams and desires \\u2013 and they can look totally different for each of us.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome partners have a secret desire for the road they haven\\u2019t taken. It\\u2019s normal to some degree\\u00a0as we always say no to one path when we go down another,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFind out whether there are paths that can be made room for so your partner can have as rich and fulfilling a life as possible. For example, one partner may be desperate to have a stint living overseas.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf this is possible to work into your lives, then see if it can get off the ground. Some of these may be less possible\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0like one partner joining the air force\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0but you can attend air force shows together or watch documentaries or movies together with such themes.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Knowing what these are will give you a good idea of your future together and what works for both of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to ask your partner how important these dreams are to them, and also whether you, as their partner, could help the dreams become a reality.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And there you have it! Some of the most important questions you should be able to answer about your partner.<\\/p><p>How did you go? Did you nail it? Knew you would. You and Jaryd are great together.<\\/p><p><em>For more from Lissy Abrahams, read her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple a happy one<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships, a unit of the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy\\u00a0founded and manages the Sydney-based therapy clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (369886034)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17577,5124,'_thumbnail_id','5008'),(17578,5124,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17579,5124,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17580,5053,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:4;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:6;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:6;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:5;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:5;s:11:\"header_size\";i:5;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:5;}}}}}'),(17581,5125,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17582,5125,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17583,5125,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17584,5125,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17585,5125,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_2139813481-scaled.jpg\",\"id\":5018,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-174,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are Only 2 Types of Friends Everyone Needs in Their Life, According to a Psychotherapist\",\"description_text\":\"5 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, more often than not you\\u2019ll find us talking about the rollercoaster ride that is romance and dating \\u2013 the\\u00a0red flags! The\\u00a0green flags! Ghosting! The whole shebang.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>However, in my years of writing about relationships and\\u00a0interviewing psychologists, if there\\u2019s one thing I\\u2019ve learnt it\\u2019s this: our relationships with our friends are more important than we might think. And they can largely affect our happiness and our health. Yes, really!<\\/p><p>Ask any expert and they\\u2019ll tell you that the need for a friendship and connection runs deep \\u2013 it\\u2019s something that\\u2019s just built into us.<\\/p><p>Psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0said, \\u201cHumans are social animals have always needed friendships and connections with others for their survival. Primitive man faced impending death when isolated from family and friends, as they were rather weak compared to other creatures in the wild. Forming friendships allowed us to be stronger than any one individual.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs social animals we originally formed trusting connections with others to help each other obtain food, shelter, and ward off predators. Even though we no longer live in the wild, we are still hard-wired for this form of interconnectedness.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Interesting, no?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe still connect with others because our drive to survive still exists and tells us to catch up with people, make new friends when we move to a new area or new workplace. We are still wired to seek belonging and connection, we\\u2019re just not aware why.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Research\\u00a0even tells us that people with strong friendships are more likely to live longer. It can also benefit your mental health, as different friends can provide different emotional needs.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWith friends in our life we typically live longer, some studies even suggest friends can add years to our lives. They are good for us in so many ways,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Looking back at the COVID-19 lockdowns and our\\u00a0mental health during the pandemic, it\\u2019s easy to see how what can happen to our state of mind when we didn\\u2019t share that face-to-face connection with friends.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst we try to make the most of it with online catch-ups, drinks and dress-ups, we still missed being in the same space as friends. The mental health of millions around the world plummeted. Our psychological distress was real. Our reliance on alcohol and drugs skyrocketed.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, yeah. Friendship is pretty integral to our health.<\\/p><p>But making friends, learning how to be a friend, and how to keep good friends is something we\\u2019re constantly learning and re-learning \\u2013 no matter how old we are.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are two main\\u00a0types of\\u00a0friends you should surround yourself with.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Geographical Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The first type of friends you should have are geographical friends. That is, the friends you make because you share a particular location with them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cRemember, building communities is primitively wired into our DNA. It\\u2019s what we do. So, if you\\u2019re in a new environment, you\\u2019ll be on the lookout for connection with others, as this will increase your desire for safety,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Bless!<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you join a new gym, school, workplace, or move to a new neighbourhood your mind will be checking out those in your vicinity for future friendship. We cannot underestimate the importance of these connections, as they enrich the new environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, a friendly neighbour keeps an eye on you and notices things that may be somewhat\\u00a0out of kilter for you at home or in the area. They may offer support when you go through hard times or enliven your home when you catch up.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same logic applies to workmates.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019ve worked in an environment where you didn\\u2019t feel you had a friend or someone you could vent to during a stressful day, you\\u2019ll know how much it sucks. It\\u2019s not that you need to hang out outside of the office \\u2013 but having a support system at work is crucial.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe spend more of our waking hours at work than we do at home. Good work friendships can make or break a job. Some jobs may be dull, even somewhat depressing, yet the friendships make it great. Friends help you look forward to going to work and enjoying your time together,\\u201d said Abrahams<\\/p><p>The not-so-good part? These type of friendships don\\u2019t always last.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we move jobs or finish university, we may not remain in contact. If we go to a new gym, we may ease off contact with our previous gym buddy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be confusing for some people as they thought the relationship was important irrespective of the current environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, thanks to social media, these days it\\u2019s so much easier to keep in touch with geographical friends, \\u201cas not everyone wants to make lengthy phone calls or \\u2018how are you?\\u2019 emails,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we maintain geographical friendships out of a particular environment they become intentional friendships, no longer bound by the geographic proximity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Which brings us to\\u2026<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Intentional Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIntentional friends are those you maintain as you have shared values and provide meaning, offer support, interest, and joy to your life,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>These\\u00a0particular\\u00a0friends can be split up into six different sub-categories:<\\/p><p><b>a) One or more full-spectrum best friends<\\/b><\\/p><p>Whether you\\u2019re having second thoughts about your relationship or stressing about your career, a full-spectrum best friend is there to help guide you in the right direction and pull you through the tough times.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are there both in the good and bad times and everything in between. They\\u2019re the go-to friends for happy news and celebrations. They can share your joy, and they can also unconditionally love and support you through some pretty hairy times.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFull-spectrum best friends may not always like your behaviour or opinions, but they don\\u2019t judge you or pull away. They\\u2019re loyal and would show their support of you to others even if you\\u2019re absent.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese best friends help you find light and laughter even in dark times. They sit with you and are not afraid of your grief or distress, whether it\\u2019s a breakup, loss of a job, or sickness. They show you through actions and words that you\\u2019re not alone.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>b) The completely honest friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Ah. The brutally honest friend. These kinds\\u00a0of\\u00a0friends don\\u2019t tiptoe around anything and aren\\u2019t worried they\\u2019re going to hurt your feelings \\u2013 they always remain genuine and open and aren\\u2019t afraid to tell you the truth.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends don\\u2019t play along with social niceties and are honest with you all the time. They speak their mind, call your BS, and tell you how they feel about your life. They may sound judgemental, yet they\\u2019re often trying to support or even protect you,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>The thing about completely honest friends is that they know your relationship is strong enough to sustain the truth. So, while it\\u2019s not always easy (it might even hurt a little), they\\u2019re not scared to tell you where you can improve.<\\/p><p>And honestly, they\\u2019re so important to have in your life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will tell you whether you are being unfair to your partner or too harsh with your kids. They will tell you if you\\u2019re being treated appallingly and need to get out of your relationship or a dead-end job. Their honesty is how they show they value you.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>c) A mentor friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Yes, friendships and mentors can co-exist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe no longer live in tribes with wise elders to tap into. We have less contact with religious figures offering advice, and we no longer believe politicians can guide us honestly without their self-interest flaunted in our face. Having friends who are mentors is critical for guiding, advising, thinking through options and opening possibilities.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Most mentor relationships play a consistent role in your life and will help you challenge your assumptions and give you the insights, advice and support you need to thrive.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are wise and can analyse situations and hold complexity in mind. They steer clear of black and white simplistic thinking. They\\u2019ve lived a bit, learnt lessons along the way, and are happy to share their experiences to support your journey.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>d) A \\u2018like a mum\\u2019 friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>This one \\u2013 this one\\u2019s important. The \\u2018mum\\u2019 friend is that one friend in your circle that\\u2019s responsible, caring and always protective of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who shows up at your door when they hear a wobble in your voice. They see themselves as part of the solution to the wobble and able to offer comfort. You feel safe to be vulnerable in their presence and even be held by them when you cry,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019ll fix a meal, encourage you to eat and get you more tissues for your tears and snot. They\\u2019re reassuring about the future being better than this moment of distress or pain.\\u201d<\\/p><p>We\\u2019re not crying, you\\u2019re crying!<\\/p><p><b>e) The encouraging friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who wants you to grow and supports your development. They encourage you to expand your life experiences whether through travel, study, or career change.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Encouraging friends push us out of our comfort zones and where we need to go, making us aware that we can always do better. These kinds of friends believe in you, they know you\\u2019re capable, and they\\u2019re always ready to cheer you on from the side-line.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019re not fearful of a little risk for a greater reward and want you to have an experience-rich life too. For example, they may encourage you to travel for a year even if it means you\\u2019re not around for them. They see your growth as separate from their own lives.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>f) The friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019<\\/b><\\/p><p>You know the one. This is the person who\\u2019s always down to hang out. You\\u2019re bored on a Sunday arvo with nothing to do? This is who you call.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to have friends you have shared specific experiences with. This could be someone who loves exercising with you, walking dogs, going to the movies or comedy shows with. The friendship thrives as you both love and value the experience. It could be your shared thing is nightclubbing or festivals or playing cards or sharing your Wordle results with every day.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019 may also relate to the content and quality of the interaction. Some friendships thrive on having interesting philosophical\\/life discussions or talking complete s**t together. This type of friend could be the friend you have the greatest laughs with or have amazing ideas and feel creative with.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Want to hear more? We\\u2019ve got you covered! Check out this e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple relationship a happy one<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17586,5125,'_thumbnail_id','5018'),(17587,5125,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17588,5125,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17589,5126,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17590,5126,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17591,5126,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17592,5126,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17593,5126,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_2139813481-scaled.jpg\",\"id\":5018,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-174,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are Only 2 Types of Friends Everyone Needs in Their Life, According to a Psychotherapist\",\"description_text\":\"5 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, more often than not you\\u2019ll find us talking about the rollercoaster ride that is romance and dating \\u2013 the\\u00a0red flags! The\\u00a0green flags! Ghosting! The whole shebang.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>However, in my years of writing about relationships and\\u00a0interviewing psychologists, if there\\u2019s one thing I\\u2019ve learnt it\\u2019s this: our relationships with our friends are more important than we might think. And they can largely affect our happiness and our health. Yes, really!<\\/p><p>Ask any expert and they\\u2019ll tell you that the need for a friendship and connection runs deep \\u2013 it\\u2019s something that\\u2019s just built into us.<\\/p><p>Psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0said, \\u201cHumans are social animals have always needed friendships and connections with others for their survival. Primitive man faced impending death when isolated from family and friends, as they were rather weak compared to other creatures in the wild. Forming friendships allowed us to be stronger than any one individual.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs social animals we originally formed trusting connections with others to help each other obtain food, shelter, and ward off predators. Even though we no longer live in the wild, we are still hard-wired for this form of interconnectedness.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Interesting, no?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe still connect with others because our drive to survive still exists and tells us to catch up with people, make new friends when we move to a new area or new workplace. We are still wired to seek belonging and connection, we\\u2019re just not aware why.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Research\\u00a0even tells us that people with strong friendships are more likely to live longer. It can also benefit your mental health, as different friends can provide different emotional needs.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWith friends in our life we typically live longer, some studies even suggest friends can add years to our lives. They are good for us in so many ways,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Looking back at the COVID-19 lockdowns and our\\u00a0mental health during the pandemic, it\\u2019s easy to see how what can happen to our state of mind when we didn\\u2019t share that face-to-face connection with friends.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst we try to make the most of it with online catch-ups, drinks and dress-ups, we still missed being in the same space as friends. The mental health of millions around the world plummeted. Our psychological distress was real. Our reliance on alcohol and drugs skyrocketed.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, yeah. Friendship is pretty integral to our health.<\\/p><p>But making friends, learning how to be a friend, and how to keep good friends is something we\\u2019re constantly learning and re-learning \\u2013 no matter how old we are.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are two main\\u00a0types of\\u00a0friends you should surround yourself with.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Geographical Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The first type of friends you should have are geographical friends. That is, the friends you make because you share a particular location with them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cRemember, building communities is primitively wired into our DNA. It\\u2019s what we do. So, if you\\u2019re in a new environment, you\\u2019ll be on the lookout for connection with others, as this will increase your desire for safety,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Bless!<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you join a new gym, school, workplace, or move to a new neighbourhood your mind will be checking out those in your vicinity for future friendship. We cannot underestimate the importance of these connections, as they enrich the new environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, a friendly neighbour keeps an eye on you and notices things that may be somewhat\\u00a0out of kilter for you at home or in the area. They may offer support when you go through hard times or enliven your home when you catch up.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same logic applies to workmates.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019ve worked in an environment where you didn\\u2019t feel you had a friend or someone you could vent to during a stressful day, you\\u2019ll know how much it sucks. It\\u2019s not that you need to hang out outside of the office \\u2013 but having a support system at work is crucial.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe spend more of our waking hours at work than we do at home. Good work friendships can make or break a job. Some jobs may be dull, even somewhat depressing, yet the friendships make it great. Friends help you look forward to going to work and enjoying your time together,\\u201d said Abrahams<\\/p><p>The not-so-good part? These type of friendships don\\u2019t always last.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we move jobs or finish university, we may not remain in contact. If we go to a new gym, we may ease off contact with our previous gym buddy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be confusing for some people as they thought the relationship was important irrespective of the current environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, thanks to social media, these days it\\u2019s so much easier to keep in touch with geographical friends, \\u201cas not everyone wants to make lengthy phone calls or \\u2018how are you?\\u2019 emails,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we maintain geographical friendships out of a particular environment they become intentional friendships, no longer bound by the geographic proximity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Which brings us to\\u2026<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Intentional Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIntentional friends are those you maintain as you have shared values and provide meaning, offer support, interest, and joy to your life,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>These\\u00a0particular\\u00a0friends can be split up into six different sub-categories:<\\/p><p><b>a) One or more full-spectrum best friends<\\/b><\\/p><p>Whether you\\u2019re having second thoughts about your relationship or stressing about your career, a full-spectrum best friend is there to help guide you in the right direction and pull you through the tough times.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are there both in the good and bad times and everything in between. They\\u2019re the go-to friends for happy news and celebrations. They can share your joy, and they can also unconditionally love and support you through some pretty hairy times.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFull-spectrum best friends may not always like your behaviour or opinions, but they don\\u2019t judge you or pull away. They\\u2019re loyal and would show their support of you to others even if you\\u2019re absent.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese best friends help you find light and laughter even in dark times. They sit with you and are not afraid of your grief or distress, whether it\\u2019s a breakup, loss of a job, or sickness. They show you through actions and words that you\\u2019re not alone.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>b) The completely honest friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Ah. The brutally honest friend. These kinds\\u00a0of\\u00a0friends don\\u2019t tiptoe around anything and aren\\u2019t worried they\\u2019re going to hurt your feelings \\u2013 they always remain genuine and open and aren\\u2019t afraid to tell you the truth.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends don\\u2019t play along with social niceties and are honest with you all the time. They speak their mind, call your BS, and tell you how they feel about your life. They may sound judgemental, yet they\\u2019re often trying to support or even protect you,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>The thing about completely honest friends is that they know your relationship is strong enough to sustain the truth. So, while it\\u2019s not always easy (it might even hurt a little), they\\u2019re not scared to tell you where you can improve.<\\/p><p>And honestly, they\\u2019re so important to have in your life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will tell you whether you are being unfair to your partner or too harsh with your kids. They will tell you if you\\u2019re being treated appallingly and need to get out of your relationship or a dead-end job. Their honesty is how they show they value you.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>c) A mentor friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Yes, friendships and mentors can co-exist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe no longer live in tribes with wise elders to tap into. We have less contact with religious figures offering advice, and we no longer believe politicians can guide us honestly without their self-interest flaunted in our face. Having friends who are mentors is critical for guiding, advising, thinking through options and opening possibilities.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Most mentor relationships play a consistent role in your life and will help you challenge your assumptions and give you the insights, advice and support you need to thrive.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are wise and can analyse situations and hold complexity in mind. They steer clear of black and white simplistic thinking. They\\u2019ve lived a bit, learnt lessons along the way, and are happy to share their experiences to support your journey.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>d) A \\u2018like a mum\\u2019 friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>This one \\u2013 this one\\u2019s important. The \\u2018mum\\u2019 friend is that one friend in your circle that\\u2019s responsible, caring and always protective of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who shows up at your door when they hear a wobble in your voice. They see themselves as part of the solution to the wobble and able to offer comfort. You feel safe to be vulnerable in their presence and even be held by them when you cry,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019ll fix a meal, encourage you to eat and get you more tissues for your tears and snot. They\\u2019re reassuring about the future being better than this moment of distress or pain.\\u201d<\\/p><p>We\\u2019re not crying, you\\u2019re crying!<\\/p><p><b>e) The encouraging friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who wants you to grow and supports your development. They encourage you to expand your life experiences whether through travel, study, or career change.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Encouraging friends push us out of our comfort zones and where we need to go, making us aware that we can always do better. These kinds of friends believe in you, they know you\\u2019re capable, and they\\u2019re always ready to cheer you on from the side-line.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019re not fearful of a little risk for a greater reward and want you to have an experience-rich life too. For example, they may encourage you to travel for a year even if it means you\\u2019re not around for them. They see your growth as separate from their own lives.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>f) The friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019<\\/b><\\/p><p>You know the one. This is the person who\\u2019s always down to hang out. You\\u2019re bored on a Sunday arvo with nothing to do? This is who you call.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to have friends you have shared specific experiences with. This could be someone who loves exercising with you, walking dogs, going to the movies or comedy shows with. The friendship thrives as you both love and value the experience. It could be your shared thing is nightclubbing or festivals or playing cards or sharing your Wordle results with every day.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019 may also relate to the content and quality of the interaction. Some friendships thrive on having interesting philosophical\\/life discussions or talking complete s**t together. This type of friend could be the friend you have the greatest laughs with or have amazing ideas and feel creative with.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Want to hear more? We\\u2019ve got you covered! Check out this e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple relationship a happy one<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17594,5126,'_thumbnail_id','5018'),(17595,5126,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17596,5126,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17597,5127,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17598,5127,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17599,5127,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17600,5127,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17601,5127,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_2139813481-scaled.jpg\",\"id\":5018,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-174,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are Only 2 Types of Friends Everyone Needs in Their Life, According to a Psychotherapist\",\"description_text\":\"5 May 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to\\u00a0relationships, more often than not you\\u2019ll find us talking about the rollercoaster ride that is romance and dating \\u2013 the\\u00a0red flags! The\\u00a0green flags! Ghosting! The whole shebang.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>However, in my years of writing about relationships and\\u00a0interviewing psychologists, if there\\u2019s one thing I\\u2019ve learnt it\\u2019s this: our relationships with our friends are more important than we might think. And they can largely affect our happiness and our health. Yes, really!<\\/p><p>Ask any expert and they\\u2019ll tell you that the need for a friendship and connection runs deep \\u2013 it\\u2019s something that\\u2019s just built into us.<\\/p><p>Psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0said, \\u201cHumans are social animals have always needed friendships and connections with others for their survival. Primitive man faced impending death when isolated from family and friends, as they were rather weak compared to other creatures in the wild. Forming friendships allowed us to be stronger than any one individual.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs social animals we originally formed trusting connections with others to help each other obtain food, shelter, and ward off predators. Even though we no longer live in the wild, we are still hard-wired for this form of interconnectedness.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Interesting, no?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe still connect with others because our drive to survive still exists and tells us to catch up with people, make new friends when we move to a new area or new workplace. We are still wired to seek belonging and connection, we\\u2019re just not aware why.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Research\\u00a0even tells us that people with strong friendships are more likely to live longer. It can also benefit your mental health, as different friends can provide different emotional needs.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWith friends in our life we typically live longer, some studies even suggest friends can add years to our lives. They are good for us in so many ways,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Looking back at the COVID-19 lockdowns and our\\u00a0mental health during the pandemic, it\\u2019s easy to see how what can happen to our state of mind when we didn\\u2019t share that face-to-face connection with friends.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst we try to make the most of it with online catch-ups, drinks and dress-ups, we still missed being in the same space as friends. The mental health of millions around the world plummeted. Our psychological distress was real. Our reliance on alcohol and drugs skyrocketed.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, yeah. Friendship is pretty integral to our health.<\\/p><p>But making friends, learning how to be a friend, and how to keep good friends is something we\\u2019re constantly learning and re-learning \\u2013 no matter how old we are.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are two main\\u00a0types of\\u00a0friends you should surround yourself with.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Geographical Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The first type of friends you should have are geographical friends. That is, the friends you make because you share a particular location with them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cRemember, building communities is primitively wired into our DNA. It\\u2019s what we do. So, if you\\u2019re in a new environment, you\\u2019ll be on the lookout for connection with others, as this will increase your desire for safety,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Bless!<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you join a new gym, school, workplace, or move to a new neighbourhood your mind will be checking out those in your vicinity for future friendship. We cannot underestimate the importance of these connections, as they enrich the new environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, a friendly neighbour keeps an eye on you and notices things that may be somewhat\\u00a0out of kilter for you at home or in the area. They may offer support when you go through hard times or enliven your home when you catch up.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same logic applies to workmates.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019ve worked in an environment where you didn\\u2019t feel you had a friend or someone you could vent to during a stressful day, you\\u2019ll know how much it sucks. It\\u2019s not that you need to hang out outside of the office \\u2013 but having a support system at work is crucial.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe spend more of our waking hours at work than we do at home. Good work friendships can make or break a job. Some jobs may be dull, even somewhat depressing, yet the friendships make it great. Friends help you look forward to going to work and enjoying your time together,\\u201d said Abrahams<\\/p><p>The not-so-good part? These type of friendships don\\u2019t always last.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we move jobs or finish university, we may not remain in contact. If we go to a new gym, we may ease off contact with our previous gym buddy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be confusing for some people as they thought the relationship was important irrespective of the current environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, thanks to social media, these days it\\u2019s so much easier to keep in touch with geographical friends, \\u201cas not everyone wants to make lengthy phone calls or \\u2018how are you?\\u2019 emails,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf we maintain geographical friendships out of a particular environment they become intentional friendships, no longer bound by the geographic proximity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Which brings us to\\u2026<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Intentional Friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIntentional friends are those you maintain as you have shared values and provide meaning, offer support, interest, and joy to your life,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>These\\u00a0particular\\u00a0friends can be split up into six different sub-categories:<\\/p><p><b>a) One or more full-spectrum best friends<\\/b><\\/p><p>Whether you\\u2019re having second thoughts about your relationship or stressing about your career, a full-spectrum best friend is there to help guide you in the right direction and pull you through the tough times.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are there both in the good and bad times and everything in between. They\\u2019re the go-to friends for happy news and celebrations. They can share your joy, and they can also unconditionally love and support you through some pretty hairy times.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cFull-spectrum best friends may not always like your behaviour or opinions, but they don\\u2019t judge you or pull away. They\\u2019re loyal and would show their support of you to others even if you\\u2019re absent.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese best friends help you find light and laughter even in dark times. They sit with you and are not afraid of your grief or distress, whether it\\u2019s a breakup, loss of a job, or sickness. They show you through actions and words that you\\u2019re not alone.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>b) The completely honest friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Ah. The brutally honest friend. These kinds\\u00a0of\\u00a0friends don\\u2019t tiptoe around anything and aren\\u2019t worried they\\u2019re going to hurt your feelings \\u2013 they always remain genuine and open and aren\\u2019t afraid to tell you the truth.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends don\\u2019t play along with social niceties and are honest with you all the time. They speak their mind, call your BS, and tell you how they feel about your life. They may sound judgemental, yet they\\u2019re often trying to support or even protect you,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>The thing about completely honest friends is that they know your relationship is strong enough to sustain the truth. So, while it\\u2019s not always easy (it might even hurt a little), they\\u2019re not scared to tell you where you can improve.<\\/p><p>And honestly, they\\u2019re so important to have in your life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will tell you whether you are being unfair to your partner or too harsh with your kids. They will tell you if you\\u2019re being treated appallingly and need to get out of your relationship or a dead-end job. Their honesty is how they show they value you.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>c) A mentor friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>Yes, friendships and mentors can co-exist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe no longer live in tribes with wise elders to tap into. We have less contact with religious figures offering advice, and we no longer believe politicians can guide us honestly without their self-interest flaunted in our face. Having friends who are mentors is critical for guiding, advising, thinking through options and opening possibilities.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Most mentor relationships play a consistent role in your life and will help you challenge your assumptions and give you the insights, advice and support you need to thrive.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese friends are wise and can analyse situations and hold complexity in mind. They steer clear of black and white simplistic thinking. They\\u2019ve lived a bit, learnt lessons along the way, and are happy to share their experiences to support your journey.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>d) A \\u2018like a mum\\u2019 friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>This one \\u2013 this one\\u2019s important. The \\u2018mum\\u2019 friend is that one friend in your circle that\\u2019s responsible, caring and always protective of you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who shows up at your door when they hear a wobble in your voice. They see themselves as part of the solution to the wobble and able to offer comfort. You feel safe to be vulnerable in their presence and even be held by them when you cry,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019ll fix a meal, encourage you to eat and get you more tissues for your tears and snot. They\\u2019re reassuring about the future being better than this moment of distress or pain.\\u201d<\\/p><p>We\\u2019re not crying, you\\u2019re crying!<\\/p><p><b>e) The encouraging friend<\\/b><\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is the friend who wants you to grow and supports your development. They encourage you to expand your life experiences whether through travel, study, or career change.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Encouraging friends push us out of our comfort zones and where we need to go, making us aware that we can always do better. These kinds of friends believe in you, they know you\\u2019re capable, and they\\u2019re always ready to cheer you on from the side-line.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey\\u2019re not fearful of a little risk for a greater reward and want you to have an experience-rich life too. For example, they may encourage you to travel for a year even if it means you\\u2019re not around for them. They see your growth as separate from their own lives.\\u201d<\\/p><p><b>f) The friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019<\\/b><\\/p><p>You know the one. This is the person who\\u2019s always down to hang out. You\\u2019re bored on a Sunday arvo with nothing to do? This is who you call.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to have friends you have shared specific experiences with. This could be someone who loves exercising with you, walking dogs, going to the movies or comedy shows with. The friendship thrives as you both love and value the experience. It could be your shared thing is nightclubbing or festivals or playing cards or sharing your Wordle results with every day.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe friend \\u2018I do that with\\u2019 may also relate to the content and quality of the interaction. Some friendships thrive on having interesting philosophical\\/life discussions or talking complete s**t together. 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"7 Signs You\\u2019re An Empath And What This Means, According To An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"22 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>We all have those people in our life who just\\u00a0*get*\\u00a0you. You know the ones. The friends that can instantly read your feelings and know what\\u2019s going on. Then there are those people you\\u2019ve known who are a little\\u2026 disconnected from the feelings of those around them.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s because there are some people in society who are more prone to empathy than others. In fact, more so than most \\u2018normal\\u2019 people.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>According to Dr Judith Orloff, psychiatrist and author of\\u00a0The Empath\\u2019s Survival Guide, each of us sit at different levels of an empathy scale.<\\/p><p>Dr Orloff describes it as a spectrum, where there\\u2019s people with no empathy (narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths), regular people who have empathy,\\u00a0highly sensitive people,\\u00a0and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.<\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>And no, before you even ask \\u2013 it doesn\\u2019t mean anything is wrong with you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cResearchers have found that empaths have more active mirror neurons \\u2013 this means they can tap into the micro-changes in others,\\u201d said psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst this ability is helpful at times,\\u00a0it can be problematic for empaths as they\\u2019re overworking in the emotional domain, often soaking up too much. Sometimes they can be filled up with feelings yet have no idea where they originated,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>Here\\u2019s absolutely\\u00a0everything you need to know about empaths \\u2013 including what it means and how to tell if you are one.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Being an empath means a little more than just being a sensitive person or being really empathetic to others \\u2013 it\\u2019s a whole other level.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are acutely aware of other people\\u2019s emotions and can often feel these emotions within themselves,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths connect with people emotionally and can easily understand them. It\\u2019s not a mental exercise but an intuitive ability. It\\u2019s their gut instinct.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And while it\\u2019s something that can be seen as a beneficial trait, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deeply.<\\/p><p>Because not only do empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, but they often internalise the feelings and pain of others, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are emotionally porous, like a sponge absorbing other people\\u2019s emotional information. They can see where people suffer and often like to ease it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How do you know if you\\u2019re an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you the kind of\\u00a0person who always avoids cringe-y or violent TV shows? Do you have a fear you\\u2019re going to disappoint people? Tend to overthink someone else\\u2019s feelings for days on end?<\\/p><p>You might be an empath.<\\/p><p>To find out what\\u00a0kind of\\u00a0characteristics are associated with empaths, we asked Abrahams to share some of the most common signs to look out for. Below are seven of them:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. You are affected by other people\\u2019s emotions and can take them on\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cYou have an incredibly highly attuned emotional radar that\\u2019s always on and can detect slight alterations in the emotional experience of others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This could be from micro changes in facial expressions, gestures, a tone of voice, volume of voice, body language, or mood shifts, she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can feel someone else\\u2019s feelings that they themselves may have no awareness of.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Just to quickly reiterate that point \\u2013 you can literally feel someone else\\u2019s feelings BEFORE they feel them.<\\/p><p>Sounds\\u2026 exhausting.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths choose to live alone and have a haven from being swamped by other people\\u2019s emotional states. Empaths can find it difficult to live with a partner as their partner\\u2019s mood and energy will impact them,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they live with their partner or a flatmate, they will need a space that\\u2019s their own to decompress and recalibrate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. You can understand other people\\u2019s perspective easily.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, empaths possess the ability to see life through a unique perspective which has been shaped by our own experiences, as well as through conscious and unconscious messages they\\u2019ve absorbed throughout life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can see other\\u2019s perspectives and stand in their shoes. This ability is a bonus, as many people can\\u2019t move away from their own viewpoint, causing them to be harsh or judgemental of others,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Due to these qualities, empaths have high emotional intelligence. \\u201cThey can be great leaders, and also valuable team members.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey also are able to tell when someone is lying to them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0their gut will feel that something is off kilter. They\\u2019ll detect the small cues of a lie and feel the residue inside them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Note to self:\\u00a0Never try to fool an empath.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. You are receptive to the environment around you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Empaths are more attuned to their environment than the average person, meaning their\\u00a0mental health can be affected by subtle energies in their environment \\u2013 including light, sounds and other sources of stimulation.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs an empath you will be more able to feel the energy of different physical environments. You\\u2019ll be sensitive too, as your finely attuned radar picks up information in that particular\\u00a0environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths feel completely drained by an environment that feels un-alive and uplifted by the energy in other spaces.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"db985b2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5a3808b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"25c6594\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. You\\u2019ve been a therapist to your peers since school\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0c21997\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3393cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed8aada\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you\\u2019re an empath, you\\u2019ve been helping people with their emotions since school days,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou were the person your peers turned to for advice and they viewed you as wise counsel. This is because you knew how to see other perspectives and could connect with their emotional experiences.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Because empaths have the ability\\u00a0to deeply feel another person\\u2019s problems and needs, they often know how to support others and what kind of comfort or encouragement they need. Their personalities are often healing and calming in times of crisis.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cMany therapists are empaths\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they too have been training since they were young. They intuitively understand about the ego and how defensively humans react when they are startled, hurt or why certain feelings arise.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs adults, they train in this field to further understand the human mind and motivations, and then want to help people decrease their suffering and distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f0b153b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8b70a54\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8a00b5e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. You can\\u2019t relax while watching TV\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9a306d6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d78bd42\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c983090\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cDo you find sitting down to watch a thriller from beginning to end too hard? Many empaths can\\u2019t watch shows with too much tension.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, empaths have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate certain TV shows, movies, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSitting with an empath watching TV is confusing for some people. They only need to hear tension music and they can be off their seat and walking away from the screen. Any violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even implied violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0can be too much to bear.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While empaths obviously understand what they\\u2019re watching is not real, Abrahams said their intense ability to connect with a character still creates enormous discomfort. They never know when the tension or suspense will increase \\u2013 so often it becomes too much to handle.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTheir hearts will race and with their mirror neurons observing the character on the screen\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they experience the fearful sensations too. They often need to physically remove themselves to calm down. It\\u2019s just too much for their mind and body and becomes unenjoyable tension.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b5185dd\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4a63f49\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f0e096\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. You may also connect with people\\u2019s physical injuries or illnesses\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8f44e8c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3cf88d4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c802aef\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAre you able to feel physical sensations when you\\u2019re around someone with physical injuries or an illness? Empaths feel these sensations in areas of their body similar to the location of the other\\u00a0person\\u2019s injury or illness. This is the level of their attunement.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Empaths are able to feel physical sensations to other people\\u2019s emotional states, Abrahams said. They tap into their anxiety or sadness and then feel this as physical sensations in their system too.<\\/p><p>Pretty crazy, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese could be heart rate increases, shaking hands, a migraine, or tightness in the chest. Physical mirroring occurs, like emotional mirroring,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat\\u2019s emotional impacts our physical experience, and what\\u2019s physical affects our emotional experience. Our mind and body are joined in us as we are one organism.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"91cce1a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13b3046\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"70164de\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. You have a strong need to help ease suffering\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"77f86d4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d3054b7\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"45b83dc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the biggest traits of an empath is how much they care \\u2013 which can often come off as caring \\u201ctoo much\\u201d or being \\u201ctoo emotional\\u201d.<\\/p><p>Take Abrahams, for example. \\u201cI saw a young boy running in the park yesterday, crying as he was running. I had to check in. \\u201cAre you ok?\\u201d I asked him. He replied \\u201cyes\\u201d, gasping for breath. I kept questioning\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0\\u201care you sure?\\u201d To which he smiled and reassured me he was fine. I then saw his dad running a fair distance ahead, and I realised that\\u00a0the boy was probably just hating the run!\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths see themselves as a resource to ease suffering. Quite simply\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they are kind and care about people (and often animals too and cannot tolerate their suffering). They know that by connecting\\u00a0and understanding people, they can help people to heal.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"85bf2a0\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c36caae\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e135894\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to thrive as an empath\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d8c0609\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"74bce76\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"459051d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>So, is being an empath good or bad?<\\/p><p>In a 2014\\u00a0study, clinical research psychologist Elaine Aron developed an evolutionary theory, proposing that sensory processing sensitivity is a trait that has evolved in order to enhance the survival of the human species.<\\/p><p>The study showed that a highly sensitive brain increased awareness and responsiveness to potential dangers, threats and opportunities in the environment, benefitting the whole group.<\\/p><p>However, the study also showed the pitfalls of being highly sensitive \\u2013 where it placed greater increased cognitive and metabolic demand upon individuals.<\\/p><p>So, how do you best navigate life as a highly sensitive empath? Is it possible to decrease the impact of this stimulation on your mental health?<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, the biggest tip is learning how to set clear boundaries.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout boundaries that protect the empath, they will find themselves overwhelmed and run ragged,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>These boundaries include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"cf87d13\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13e1377\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c825649\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Protecting your time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a50854c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b9b3638\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e70a35f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, be cautious who you surround yourself with. \\u201cEmpaths need to consider how much time they spend helping others with their emotional states,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs they see themselves as a resource, they often go the extra mile to help people understand their struggles and to ease their distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"7351f1e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6e780b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a3d9ce0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Protecting your energy levels\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"2eaa995\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"068c75f\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ba27732\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It\\u2019s also really important to know when to carve out time for yourself in order to decrease the excess energy and stimulation you\\u2019re getting from others and the surrounding environment.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout protecting their energy levels, empaths can become immersed in the overwhelmed and emotional lives of others, which may leave the empath feeling depleted and exhausted.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"032d329\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ebd5e10\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"eaf12a0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Looking after self-care routines and rituals\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8a6fe2d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0176c74\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d5c6ceb\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cWhen empaths absorb the emotional information from others, they may expose themselves to hardcore emotional states. This may happen often\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0at work, with colleagues, with friends, with family,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSuch levels of emotional exposure can be experienced as stress in the empath\\u2019s mental and physical system. For this reason, empaths need to take care that their system can actually manage repeated exposures without being compromised.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"56eca57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163e5d3\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"42ba220\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Understanding what\\u2019s your stuff and what isn\\u2019t\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"aa37d01\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed4550c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dd2cc13\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This is a tricky one, and it can end up being really detrimental to your mental health if you can\\u2019t work out what\\u2019s yours to care about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cJust because empaths can absorb emotional information doesn\\u2019t mean they always know where the emotional experience originated,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the information will hit up on their own emotional stuff. Therapy is a great way for empaths to learn to distinguish what\\u2019s their own stuff and what\\u2019s someone else\\u2019s.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"97586f5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"baeac1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8ea7d94\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Don\\u2019t provide solutions constantly\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e9a508f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9e20cf8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"51d2a24\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another important rule? Don\\u2019t feel like\\u00a0you have to \\u2018fix\\u2019 everything. Set some clear boundaries and know when you should remove yourself from a conversation.<\\/p><p>Often empaths will take on other people\\u2019s energy so as not to offend them (read: the person at the party who mentally unloads everything on you) \\u2013 which only leaves you feeling overwhelmed and anxious.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important that empaths don\\u2019t provide all the solutions\\u00a0for other people\\u2019s struggles. They should point them in the direction of help so that they can grow and have the opportunity to\\u00a0join the dots of their own experience,\\u201d suggests Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis facilitates a developmental journey without the empath needing to fully immerse themselves in their development.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f6cc322\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e20cf0d\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4bebb8b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Speak out about poor behaviour towards you.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"39963c1\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e121a86\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5746731\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Lastly, Abrahams urges empaths to learn how to speak up. Just because you have the ability to understand other people\\u2019s motivations and behaviour, doesn\\u2019t mean you should use this as a way of excusing their behaviour.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to understand people, however the empath needs to ensure they call out crappy behaviour towards them and don\\u2019t suffer for their understanding.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to hear more advice from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p>Are you an empath? Do you relate to any of these characteristics?<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1185179290)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17612,5128,'_thumbnail_id','5006'),(17613,5128,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17614,5128,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17615,5129,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17616,5129,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17617,5129,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17618,5129,'_wp_page_template','default');
INSERT INTO `wpjr_postmeta` VALUES (17619,5129,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1185179290-768x512-1.jpg\",\"id\":5006,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-257,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"7 Signs You\\u2019re An Empath And What This Means, According To An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"22 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>We all have those people in our life who just\\u00a0*get*\\u00a0you. You know the ones. The friends that can instantly read your feelings and know what\\u2019s going on. Then there are those people you\\u2019ve known who are a little\\u2026 disconnected from the feelings of those around them.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s because there are some people in society who are more prone to empathy than others. In fact, more so than most \\u2018normal\\u2019 people.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>According to Dr Judith Orloff, psychiatrist and author of\\u00a0The Empath\\u2019s Survival Guide, each of us sit at different levels of an empathy scale.<\\/p><p>Dr Orloff describes it as a spectrum, where there\\u2019s people with no empathy (narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths), regular people who have empathy,\\u00a0highly sensitive people,\\u00a0and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.<\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>And no, before you even ask \\u2013 it doesn\\u2019t mean anything is wrong with you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cResearchers have found that empaths have more active mirror neurons \\u2013 this means they can tap into the micro-changes in others,\\u201d said psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst this ability is helpful at times,\\u00a0it can be problematic for empaths as they\\u2019re overworking in the emotional domain, often soaking up too much. Sometimes they can be filled up with feelings yet have no idea where they originated,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>Here\\u2019s absolutely\\u00a0everything you need to know about empaths \\u2013 including what it means and how to tell if you are one.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Being an empath means a little more than just being a sensitive person or being really empathetic to others \\u2013 it\\u2019s a whole other level.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are acutely aware of other people\\u2019s emotions and can often feel these emotions within themselves,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths connect with people emotionally and can easily understand them. It\\u2019s not a mental exercise but an intuitive ability. It\\u2019s their gut instinct.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And while it\\u2019s something that can be seen as a beneficial trait, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deeply.<\\/p><p>Because not only do empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, but they often internalise the feelings and pain of others, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are emotionally porous, like a sponge absorbing other people\\u2019s emotional information. They can see where people suffer and often like to ease it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How do you know if you\\u2019re an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you the kind of\\u00a0person who always avoids cringe-y or violent TV shows? Do you have a fear you\\u2019re going to disappoint people? Tend to overthink someone else\\u2019s feelings for days on end?<\\/p><p>You might be an empath.<\\/p><p>To find out what\\u00a0kind of\\u00a0characteristics are associated with empaths, we asked Abrahams to share some of the most common signs to look out for. Below are seven of them:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. You are affected by other people\\u2019s emotions and can take them on\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cYou have an incredibly highly attuned emotional radar that\\u2019s always on and can detect slight alterations in the emotional experience of others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This could be from micro changes in facial expressions, gestures, a tone of voice, volume of voice, body language, or mood shifts, she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can feel someone else\\u2019s feelings that they themselves may have no awareness of.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Just to quickly reiterate that point \\u2013 you can literally feel someone else\\u2019s feelings BEFORE they feel them.<\\/p><p>Sounds\\u2026 exhausting.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths choose to live alone and have a haven from being swamped by other people\\u2019s emotional states. Empaths can find it difficult to live with a partner as their partner\\u2019s mood and energy will impact them,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they live with their partner or a flatmate, they will need a space that\\u2019s their own to decompress and recalibrate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. You can understand other people\\u2019s perspective easily.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, empaths possess the ability to see life through a unique perspective which has been shaped by our own experiences, as well as through conscious and unconscious messages they\\u2019ve absorbed throughout life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can see other\\u2019s perspectives and stand in their shoes. This ability is a bonus, as many people can\\u2019t move away from their own viewpoint, causing them to be harsh or judgemental of others,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Due to these qualities, empaths have high emotional intelligence. \\u201cThey can be great leaders, and also valuable team members.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey also are able to tell when someone is lying to them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0their gut will feel that something is off kilter. They\\u2019ll detect the small cues of a lie and feel the residue inside them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Note to self:\\u00a0Never try to fool an empath.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. You are receptive to the environment around you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Empaths are more attuned to their environment than the average person, meaning their\\u00a0mental health can be affected by subtle energies in their environment \\u2013 including light, sounds and other sources of stimulation.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs an empath you will be more able to feel the energy of different physical environments. You\\u2019ll be sensitive too, as your finely attuned radar picks up information in that particular\\u00a0environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths feel completely drained by an environment that feels un-alive and uplifted by the energy in other spaces.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"db985b2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5a3808b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"25c6594\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. You\\u2019ve been a therapist to your peers since school\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0c21997\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3393cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed8aada\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you\\u2019re an empath, you\\u2019ve been helping people with their emotions since school days,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou were the person your peers turned to for advice and they viewed you as wise counsel. This is because you knew how to see other perspectives and could connect with their emotional experiences.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Because empaths have the ability\\u00a0to deeply feel another person\\u2019s problems and needs, they often know how to support others and what kind of comfort or encouragement they need. Their personalities are often healing and calming in times of crisis.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cMany therapists are empaths\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they too have been training since they were young. They intuitively understand about the ego and how defensively humans react when they are startled, hurt or why certain feelings arise.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs adults, they train in this field to further understand the human mind and motivations, and then want to help people decrease their suffering and distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f0b153b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8b70a54\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8a00b5e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. You can\\u2019t relax while watching TV\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9a306d6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d78bd42\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c983090\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cDo you find sitting down to watch a thriller from beginning to end too hard? Many empaths can\\u2019t watch shows with too much tension.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, empaths have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate certain TV shows, movies, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSitting with an empath watching TV is confusing for some people. They only need to hear tension music and they can be off their seat and walking away from the screen. Any violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even implied violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0can be too much to bear.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While empaths obviously understand what they\\u2019re watching is not real, Abrahams said their intense ability to connect with a character still creates enormous discomfort. They never know when the tension or suspense will increase \\u2013 so often it becomes too much to handle.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTheir hearts will race and with their mirror neurons observing the character on the screen\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they experience the fearful sensations too. They often need to physically remove themselves to calm down. It\\u2019s just too much for their mind and body and becomes unenjoyable tension.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b5185dd\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4a63f49\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f0e096\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. You may also connect with people\\u2019s physical injuries or illnesses\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8f44e8c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3cf88d4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c802aef\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAre you able to feel physical sensations when you\\u2019re around someone with physical injuries or an illness? Empaths feel these sensations in areas of their body similar to the location of the other\\u00a0person\\u2019s injury or illness. This is the level of their attunement.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Empaths are able to feel physical sensations to other people\\u2019s emotional states, Abrahams said. They tap into their anxiety or sadness and then feel this as physical sensations in their system too.<\\/p><p>Pretty crazy, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese could be heart rate increases, shaking hands, a migraine, or tightness in the chest. Physical mirroring occurs, like emotional mirroring,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat\\u2019s emotional impacts our physical experience, and what\\u2019s physical affects our emotional experience. Our mind and body are joined in us as we are one organism.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"91cce1a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13b3046\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"70164de\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. You have a strong need to help ease suffering\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"77f86d4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d3054b7\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"45b83dc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the biggest traits of an empath is how much they care \\u2013 which can often come off as caring \\u201ctoo much\\u201d or being \\u201ctoo emotional\\u201d.<\\/p><p>Take Abrahams, for example. \\u201cI saw a young boy running in the park yesterday, crying as he was running. I had to check in. \\u201cAre you ok?\\u201d I asked him. He replied \\u201cyes\\u201d, gasping for breath. I kept questioning\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0\\u201care you sure?\\u201d To which he smiled and reassured me he was fine. I then saw his dad running a fair distance ahead, and I realised that\\u00a0the boy was probably just hating the run!\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths see themselves as a resource to ease suffering. Quite simply\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they are kind and care about people (and often animals too and cannot tolerate their suffering). They know that by connecting\\u00a0and understanding people, they can help people to heal.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"85bf2a0\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c36caae\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e135894\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to thrive as an empath\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d8c0609\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"74bce76\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"459051d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>So, is being an empath good or bad?<\\/p><p>In a 2014\\u00a0study, clinical research psychologist Elaine Aron developed an evolutionary theory, proposing that sensory processing sensitivity is a trait that has evolved in order to enhance the survival of the human species.<\\/p><p>The study showed that a highly sensitive brain increased awareness and responsiveness to potential dangers, threats and opportunities in the environment, benefitting the whole group.<\\/p><p>However, the study also showed the pitfalls of being highly sensitive \\u2013 where it placed greater increased cognitive and metabolic demand upon individuals.<\\/p><p>So, how do you best navigate life as a highly sensitive empath? Is it possible to decrease the impact of this stimulation on your mental health?<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, the biggest tip is learning how to set clear boundaries.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout boundaries that protect the empath, they will find themselves overwhelmed and run ragged,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>These boundaries include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"cf87d13\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13e1377\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c825649\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Protecting your time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a50854c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b9b3638\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e70a35f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, be cautious who you surround yourself with. \\u201cEmpaths need to consider how much time they spend helping others with their emotional states,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs they see themselves as a resource, they often go the extra mile to help people understand their struggles and to ease their distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"7351f1e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6e780b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a3d9ce0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Protecting your energy levels\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"2eaa995\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"068c75f\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ba27732\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It\\u2019s also really important to know when to carve out time for yourself in order to decrease the excess energy and stimulation you\\u2019re getting from others and the surrounding environment.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout protecting their energy levels, empaths can become immersed in the overwhelmed and emotional lives of others, which may leave the empath feeling depleted and exhausted.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"032d329\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ebd5e10\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"eaf12a0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Looking after self-care routines and rituals\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8a6fe2d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0176c74\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d5c6ceb\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cWhen empaths absorb the emotional information from others, they may expose themselves to hardcore emotional states. This may happen often\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0at work, with colleagues, with friends, with family,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSuch levels of emotional exposure can be experienced as stress in the empath\\u2019s mental and physical system. For this reason, empaths need to take care that their system can actually manage repeated exposures without being compromised.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"56eca57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163e5d3\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"42ba220\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Understanding what\\u2019s your stuff and what isn\\u2019t\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"aa37d01\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed4550c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dd2cc13\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This is a tricky one, and it can end up being really detrimental to your mental health if you can\\u2019t work out what\\u2019s yours to care about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cJust because empaths can absorb emotional information doesn\\u2019t mean they always know where the emotional experience originated,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the information will hit up on their own emotional stuff. Therapy is a great way for empaths to learn to distinguish what\\u2019s their own stuff and what\\u2019s someone else\\u2019s.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"97586f5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"baeac1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8ea7d94\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Don\\u2019t provide solutions constantly\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e9a508f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9e20cf8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"51d2a24\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another important rule? Don\\u2019t feel like\\u00a0you have to \\u2018fix\\u2019 everything. Set some clear boundaries and know when you should remove yourself from a conversation.<\\/p><p>Often empaths will take on other people\\u2019s energy so as not to offend them (read: the person at the party who mentally unloads everything on you) \\u2013 which only leaves you feeling overwhelmed and anxious.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important that empaths don\\u2019t provide all the solutions\\u00a0for other people\\u2019s struggles. They should point them in the direction of help so that they can grow and have the opportunity to\\u00a0join the dots of their own experience,\\u201d suggests Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis facilitates a developmental journey without the empath needing to fully immerse themselves in their development.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f6cc322\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e20cf0d\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4bebb8b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Speak out about poor behaviour towards you.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"39963c1\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e121a86\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5746731\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Lastly, Abrahams urges empaths to learn how to speak up. Just because you have the ability to understand other people\\u2019s motivations and behaviour, doesn\\u2019t mean you should use this as a way of excusing their behaviour.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to understand people, however the empath needs to ensure they call out crappy behaviour towards them and don\\u2019t suffer for their understanding.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to hear more advice from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p>Are you an empath? Do you relate to any of these characteristics?<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1185179290)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17620,5129,'_thumbnail_id','5006'),(17621,5129,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17622,5129,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17623,5130,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17624,5130,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17625,5130,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17626,5130,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17627,5130,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1185179290-768x512-1.jpg\",\"id\":5006,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-257,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"7 Signs You\\u2019re An Empath And What This Means, According To An Expert\",\"description_text\":\"22 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>We all have those people in our life who just\\u00a0*get*\\u00a0you. You know the ones. The friends that can instantly read your feelings and know what\\u2019s going on. Then there are those people you\\u2019ve known who are a little\\u2026 disconnected from the feelings of those around them.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s because there are some people in society who are more prone to empathy than others. In fact, more so than most \\u2018normal\\u2019 people.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>According to Dr Judith Orloff, psychiatrist and author of\\u00a0The Empath\\u2019s Survival Guide, each of us sit at different levels of an empathy scale.<\\/p><p>Dr Orloff describes it as a spectrum, where there\\u2019s people with no empathy (narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths), regular people who have empathy,\\u00a0highly sensitive people,\\u00a0and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.<\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>And no, before you even ask \\u2013 it doesn\\u2019t mean anything is wrong with you.<\\/p><p>\\u201cResearchers have found that empaths have more active mirror neurons \\u2013 this means they can tap into the micro-changes in others,\\u201d said psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst this ability is helpful at times,\\u00a0it can be problematic for empaths as they\\u2019re overworking in the emotional domain, often soaking up too much. Sometimes they can be filled up with feelings yet have no idea where they originated,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>Here\\u2019s absolutely\\u00a0everything you need to know about empaths \\u2013 including what it means and how to tell if you are one.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Being an empath means a little more than just being a sensitive person or being really empathetic to others \\u2013 it\\u2019s a whole other level.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are acutely aware of other people\\u2019s emotions and can often feel these emotions within themselves,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths connect with people emotionally and can easily understand them. It\\u2019s not a mental exercise but an intuitive ability. It\\u2019s their gut instinct.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And while it\\u2019s something that can be seen as a beneficial trait, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deeply.<\\/p><p>Because not only do empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, but they often internalise the feelings and pain of others, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths are emotionally porous, like a sponge absorbing other people\\u2019s emotional information. They can see where people suffer and often like to ease it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How do you know if you\\u2019re an empath?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you the kind of\\u00a0person who always avoids cringe-y or violent TV shows? Do you have a fear you\\u2019re going to disappoint people? Tend to overthink someone else\\u2019s feelings for days on end?<\\/p><p>You might be an empath.<\\/p><p>To find out what\\u00a0kind of\\u00a0characteristics are associated with empaths, we asked Abrahams to share some of the most common signs to look out for. Below are seven of them:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. You are affected by other people\\u2019s emotions and can take them on\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cYou have an incredibly highly attuned emotional radar that\\u2019s always on and can detect slight alterations in the emotional experience of others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This could be from micro changes in facial expressions, gestures, a tone of voice, volume of voice, body language, or mood shifts, she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can feel someone else\\u2019s feelings that they themselves may have no awareness of.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Just to quickly reiterate that point \\u2013 you can literally feel someone else\\u2019s feelings BEFORE they feel them.<\\/p><p>Sounds\\u2026 exhausting.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths choose to live alone and have a haven from being swamped by other people\\u2019s emotional states. Empaths can find it difficult to live with a partner as their partner\\u2019s mood and energy will impact them,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf they live with their partner or a flatmate, they will need a space that\\u2019s their own to decompress and recalibrate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bdbffa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"899caaa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f325b3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. You can understand other people\\u2019s perspective easily.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4533b16\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4974a32\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5dd624a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, empaths possess the ability to see life through a unique perspective which has been shaped by our own experiences, as well as through conscious and unconscious messages they\\u2019ve absorbed throughout life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can see other\\u2019s perspectives and stand in their shoes. This ability is a bonus, as many people can\\u2019t move away from their own viewpoint, causing them to be harsh or judgemental of others,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Due to these qualities, empaths have high emotional intelligence. \\u201cThey can be great leaders, and also valuable team members.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey also are able to tell when someone is lying to them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0their gut will feel that something is off kilter. They\\u2019ll detect the small cues of a lie and feel the residue inside them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Note to self:\\u00a0Never try to fool an empath.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"27b462b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"26a40d2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"508c44a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. You are receptive to the environment around you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0dc47aa\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e7ea79\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8e3ee73\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Empaths are more attuned to their environment than the average person, meaning their\\u00a0mental health can be affected by subtle energies in their environment \\u2013 including light, sounds and other sources of stimulation.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs an empath you will be more able to feel the energy of different physical environments. You\\u2019ll be sensitive too, as your finely attuned radar picks up information in that particular\\u00a0environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSome empaths feel completely drained by an environment that feels un-alive and uplifted by the energy in other spaces.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"db985b2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5a3808b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"25c6594\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. You\\u2019ve been a therapist to your peers since school\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0c21997\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3393cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed8aada\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you\\u2019re an empath, you\\u2019ve been helping people with their emotions since school days,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou were the person your peers turned to for advice and they viewed you as wise counsel. This is because you knew how to see other perspectives and could connect with their emotional experiences.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Because empaths have the ability\\u00a0to deeply feel another person\\u2019s problems and needs, they often know how to support others and what kind of comfort or encouragement they need. Their personalities are often healing and calming in times of crisis.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cMany therapists are empaths\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they too have been training since they were young. They intuitively understand about the ego and how defensively humans react when they are startled, hurt or why certain feelings arise.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs adults, they train in this field to further understand the human mind and motivations, and then want to help people decrease their suffering and distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f0b153b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8b70a54\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8a00b5e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. You can\\u2019t relax while watching TV\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9a306d6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d78bd42\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c983090\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cDo you find sitting down to watch a thriller from beginning to end too hard? Many empaths can\\u2019t watch shows with too much tension.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, empaths have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate certain TV shows, movies, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSitting with an empath watching TV is confusing for some people. They only need to hear tension music and they can be off their seat and walking away from the screen. Any violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even implied violence\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0can be too much to bear.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While empaths obviously understand what they\\u2019re watching is not real, Abrahams said their intense ability to connect with a character still creates enormous discomfort. They never know when the tension or suspense will increase \\u2013 so often it becomes too much to handle.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTheir hearts will race and with their mirror neurons observing the character on the screen\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they experience the fearful sensations too. They often need to physically remove themselves to calm down. It\\u2019s just too much for their mind and body and becomes unenjoyable tension.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b5185dd\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4a63f49\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f0e096\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. You may also connect with people\\u2019s physical injuries or illnesses\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8f44e8c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3cf88d4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c802aef\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAre you able to feel physical sensations when you\\u2019re around someone with physical injuries or an illness? Empaths feel these sensations in areas of their body similar to the location of the other\\u00a0person\\u2019s injury or illness. This is the level of their attunement.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Empaths are able to feel physical sensations to other people\\u2019s emotional states, Abrahams said. They tap into their anxiety or sadness and then feel this as physical sensations in their system too.<\\/p><p>Pretty crazy, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThese could be heart rate increases, shaking hands, a migraine, or tightness in the chest. Physical mirroring occurs, like emotional mirroring,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat\\u2019s emotional impacts our physical experience, and what\\u2019s physical affects our emotional experience. Our mind and body are joined in us as we are one organism.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"91cce1a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13b3046\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"70164de\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. You have a strong need to help ease suffering\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"77f86d4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d3054b7\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"45b83dc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the biggest traits of an empath is how much they care \\u2013 which can often come off as caring \\u201ctoo much\\u201d or being \\u201ctoo emotional\\u201d.<\\/p><p>Take Abrahams, for example. \\u201cI saw a young boy running in the park yesterday, crying as he was running. I had to check in. \\u201cAre you ok?\\u201d I asked him. He replied \\u201cyes\\u201d, gasping for breath. I kept questioning\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0\\u201care you sure?\\u201d To which he smiled and reassured me he was fine. I then saw his dad running a fair distance ahead, and I realised that\\u00a0the boy was probably just hating the run!\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths see themselves as a resource to ease suffering. Quite simply\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0they are kind and care about people (and often animals too and cannot tolerate their suffering). They know that by connecting\\u00a0and understanding people, they can help people to heal.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"85bf2a0\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c36caae\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e135894\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to thrive as an empath\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d8c0609\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"74bce76\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"459051d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>So, is being an empath good or bad?<\\/p><p>In a 2014\\u00a0study, clinical research psychologist Elaine Aron developed an evolutionary theory, proposing that sensory processing sensitivity is a trait that has evolved in order to enhance the survival of the human species.<\\/p><p>The study showed that a highly sensitive brain increased awareness and responsiveness to potential dangers, threats and opportunities in the environment, benefitting the whole group.<\\/p><p>However, the study also showed the pitfalls of being highly sensitive \\u2013 where it placed greater increased cognitive and metabolic demand upon individuals.<\\/p><p>So, how do you best navigate life as a highly sensitive empath? Is it possible to decrease the impact of this stimulation on your mental health?<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, the biggest tip is learning how to set clear boundaries.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout boundaries that protect the empath, they will find themselves overwhelmed and run ragged,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>These boundaries include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"cf87d13\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13e1377\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c825649\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Protecting your time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a50854c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b9b3638\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e70a35f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, be cautious who you surround yourself with. \\u201cEmpaths need to consider how much time they spend helping others with their emotional states,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cAs they see themselves as a resource, they often go the extra mile to help people understand their struggles and to ease their distress.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"7351f1e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6e780b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a3d9ce0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Protecting your energy levels\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"2eaa995\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"068c75f\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ba27732\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It\\u2019s also really important to know when to carve out time for yourself in order to decrease the excess energy and stimulation you\\u2019re getting from others and the surrounding environment.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout protecting their energy levels, empaths can become immersed in the overwhelmed and emotional lives of others, which may leave the empath feeling depleted and exhausted.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"032d329\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ebd5e10\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"eaf12a0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Looking after self-care routines and rituals\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8a6fe2d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0176c74\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d5c6ceb\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cWhen empaths absorb the emotional information from others, they may expose themselves to hardcore emotional states. This may happen often\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0at work, with colleagues, with friends, with family,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSuch levels of emotional exposure can be experienced as stress in the empath\\u2019s mental and physical system. For this reason, empaths need to take care that their system can actually manage repeated exposures without being compromised.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"56eca57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163e5d3\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"42ba220\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Understanding what\\u2019s your stuff and what isn\\u2019t\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"aa37d01\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ed4550c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dd2cc13\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This is a tricky one, and it can end up being really detrimental to your mental health if you can\\u2019t work out what\\u2019s yours to care about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cJust because empaths can absorb emotional information doesn\\u2019t mean they always know where the emotional experience originated,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the information will hit up on their own emotional stuff. Therapy is a great way for empaths to learn to distinguish what\\u2019s their own stuff and what\\u2019s someone else\\u2019s.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"97586f5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"baeac1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8ea7d94\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Don\\u2019t provide solutions constantly\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e9a508f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9e20cf8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"51d2a24\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another important rule? Don\\u2019t feel like\\u00a0you have to \\u2018fix\\u2019 everything. Set some clear boundaries and know when you should remove yourself from a conversation.<\\/p><p>Often empaths will take on other people\\u2019s energy so as not to offend them (read: the person at the party who mentally unloads everything on you) \\u2013 which only leaves you feeling overwhelmed and anxious.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important that empaths don\\u2019t provide all the solutions\\u00a0for other people\\u2019s struggles. They should point them in the direction of help so that they can grow and have the opportunity to\\u00a0join the dots of their own experience,\\u201d suggests Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis facilitates a developmental journey without the empath needing to fully immerse themselves in their development.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f6cc322\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e20cf0d\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4bebb8b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Speak out about poor behaviour towards you.\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"39963c1\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e121a86\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5746731\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Lastly, Abrahams urges empaths to learn how to speak up. Just because you have the ability to understand other people\\u2019s motivations and behaviour, doesn\\u2019t mean you should use this as a way of excusing their behaviour.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s great to understand people, however the empath needs to ensure they call out crappy behaviour towards them and don\\u2019t suffer for their understanding.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to hear more advice from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p>Are you an empath? Do you relate to any of these characteristics?<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1185179290)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17628,5130,'_thumbnail_id','5006'),(17629,5130,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17630,5130,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17631,5063,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:35;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:35;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:35;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:15;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:17;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:17;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:16;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:16;s:11:\"header_size\";i:16;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:16;}}}}}'),(17632,5131,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17633,5131,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17634,5131,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17635,5131,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17636,5131,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1523322002.jpg\",\"id\":5005,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-257,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"A Psychotherapist Told Us There Are 4 Different Types Of Shame. Here\\u2019s What They Mean\",\"description_text\":\"3 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of the worst, most embarrassing thing that\\u2019s ever happened to you. Are you picturing it? It\\u2019s\\u2026 bloody uncomfortable to look back on, isn\\u2019t it?\\u00a0 It might be\\u00a0that time your date completely ghosted you. When you had to do a work presentation, choked up, and had to sit down. That time your skirt rolled up underneath your bag and you flashed a whole bus full of people\\u2026<\\/p><p>Shame is a universal experience that comes in different scenarios \\u2013 and we all experience it in some shape or form.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And she\\u2019s up there with some of the most unpleasant of feels. Painful, in fact. Like, sometimes it\\u2019s uncomfortable enough to make you feel like\\u00a0you could actually just\\u2026 disappear.<\\/p><p>What you might not know about shame, however, is that there are some common situations where we\\u2019re more likely to feel bad about ourselves \\u2013 and each can affect us in different ways.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we speak to psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and look at everything we never knew we needed to know about shame.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cShame is a universal emotion we feel when we violate social norms. At such moments we feel humiliated, exposed, and small and are unable to look another person straight in the eye.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can feel sick to our stomach, red in the face, and we typically want to hide from everyone.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s a common emotion that everyone will feel, Abrahams describes it as \\u201can underground emotion\\u201d that\\u2019s \\u201cdifferent from other emotions that we can talk about.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Weird, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel or reflect on our behaviour that causes us shame, we can become consumed with believing we \\u2013 as a person \\u2013 are bad,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering if this is just the same as guilt \\u2013 same. But apparently, they\\u2019re actually two very separate emotions.<\\/p><p>While they may seem closely linked, Abrahams said that when we feel guilt, it\\u2019s our behaviour that is usually deemed as \\u2018bad\\u2019, whereas with shame, we don\\u2019t absorb the \\u2018badness\\u2019 into our sense of self, as we do with guilt.<\\/p><p>Shame goes to a deeper level of the psyche, where there\\u2019s a more painful awareness of the self. While shame\\u00a0can be felt in many situations, Abrahams said there is something at the core of shame that is always present \\u2013 a fear of disconnection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cLeading shame expert Brene Brown hits the nail perfectly on the head in her definition that \\u2018shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.\'\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cHer research shows that humans are hard-wired in every way for connection, love and belonging.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While the feeling of shame can be brief and fleeting, it can also be an enduring emotion that can make you feel like\\u00a0you are fundamentally\\u00a0flawed and not \\u2018good enough\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame can exist wherever we believe we\\u2019re flawed, fearing people who are important to us will see us as not up to scratch, and then flick us away,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>How sad!<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans are social animals, as are many mammals. As social animals, we work hard to keep within the bounds of the various communities we belong. We need the feeling of inclusion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s a reason we do this. We want others to see us in a desirable way and our ego helps us create and curate the image of ourselves that we wish to portray.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we behave in a way that\\u2019s out of the social norm, it will tap into our primitive fear that\\u00a0others will find out we\\u2019re not good enough, or unworthy, or unlovable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0and any of these translate to being abandonable. And in our primitive DNA we know that being abandoned by our herd is deadly\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0just as it is for mammals in the wild.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Meaning? We have to stay on top of our game in order to protect ourselves.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe even have our ego telling us to behave in certain ways to protect our identity in public. It works hard to prevent us from being cancelled. Shame is why cancel culture is so powerful.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can brutally judge someone who mis-stepped too far for our liking as unworthy, cut them down and then ostracise them. We become judge and jury, and feel blemish-free and pure in our self-image, implying \\u2018we\\u2019d never behave so poorly\\u2019. Social media has fuelled this exponentially.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some of the most common types of shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to psychotherapist Joseph Burgo, author of\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.amazon.com.au\\/Shame-Free-Yourself-Build-Self-Esteem\\/dp\\/1250151309\\\"><strong>Shame: Free Yourself, Find Joy and Build True Self Esteem<\\/strong><\\/a>,\\u00a0there are four common types of sham, which he refers to as \\u201cshame paradigms\\u201d.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Unrequited love\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams describes one-sided love as one of the most fundamentally\\u00a0shameful experiences, \\u201csuch as a mother who doesn\\u2019t love their child, and the child feels inadequate and lacking.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see this in couple relationships where partners experience the shame of their partner\\u2019s diminishing emotional and sexual connection to them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Exclusion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of that time you weren\\u2019t invited to THAT party. Or when you were left out of the \\u2018group chat\\u2019 on WhatsApp or messenger.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to belong to our community or herd as humans have needed to belong to keep alive. It\\u2019s primitively wired in our mind and body that we are safer within a group and have more protection in numbers,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans on their own in the wild are extremely vulnerable to predators, just like many other mammals. Exclusion\\u00a0is wired into our DNA to symbolise vulnerability and death.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"458afbf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ef6e01\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"06fe96b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Unwanted exposure\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4208444\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52ac754\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6da532f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis shame happens when we feel we\\u2019ve stepped out of our norm in public, fearing judgement. My client Rachel had a relationship with a married man at work. They were caught up in what they felt was the loveliness of their affair until they weren\\u2019t\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0his wife found out.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMonths later, she feels shame about her involvement in this relationship and can\\u2019t reconcile how she \\u2018as an essentially good person\\u2019 could end up in an affair. She\\u2019s mortified by her actions, worries about what her colleagues think of her, and her mind is consumed daily with thoughts about it.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8bbbf4e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4922c23\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52981f2\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Disappointed expectation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"69b4838\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"818f701\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c90d384\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This type of shame is all about falling short of expectations \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s romantically or professionally.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMy client Jerome has a partner who constantly compares him unfavourably to her ex-boyfriend, and he feels diminished and useless,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cGerald wants the world to swallow him up when his partner shakes a finger, deeming him a \\u2018disappointment and embarrassment\\u2019,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cCan you see that in all of\\u00a0these examples, shame is the fear of being perceived as unworthy and abandonable? It\\u2019s a primitive fear that there is something\\u2019s not right about us and others will see it. We can all have these feelings.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d919458\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c21710a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ec2a5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to learn from shame\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0029ec4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"77d2895\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d1a04b4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The good news? These are healthy emotions that everyone has \\u2013 so don\\u2019t feel like it\\u2019s just you. For some reason, though \\u2013 we just don\\u2019t talk about it, making it really hard for people to deal with.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe want to hide from it more than any other emotion. It hates being spoken about. We don\\u2019t want others to know about this part of us, as we fear their harsh judgments of us as inadequate and unworthy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel shame, we can go to great lengths to avoid people, self-isolate and disconnect from others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe also find techniques to disconnect from ourselves, such as finding distractions, or even constructing ego-based stories to try to\\u00a0bolster our fragile ego\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as finding someone to blame, making harsh judgments of others, or minimising our role or responsibility. It\\u2019s awful for us to feel we are somehow\\u00a0\\u2018bad\\u2019 to the core.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Instead of just not dealing with it, Abrahams said when we\\u2019re feeling shame, we need to do the opposite of what shame wants us to do.<\\/p><p>When shame is overwhelming, there are three key things you need to do in order to help yourself learn and move forward.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4b9d236\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6c20018\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9aba557\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Don\\u2019t hide from it\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d1e0edb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6132632\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b30caa0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to talk about it and get it out into the open. \\u201cWe need to expose shame by talking about it with someone who is empathic and understanding. This provides relief,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame survives alone and in secret. When we do the opposite, it cannot survive. Don\\u2019t plaster it on social media but make sure it\\u2019s a safe place to talk about it. Many people talk about their shame in therapy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9ed28a6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"86c35b6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"700b02d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Have self-compassion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"81febf2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e4bb3e1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e5bccf0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAs shame happens between people\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0the best thing we can do is heal it with people. Self-compassion is key because when we\\u2019re able to be gentle with ourselves in the midst of shame, we are more likely to reach out, connect, and experience empathy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b50534c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e701004\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d109fbd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gather the learning from the experience\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bbbbc47\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"94d0d3a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b3b4a8\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you messed up\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0decide to do it differently next time. Ask yourself what you learnt from the experience? Has it made you less judgemental and harsh? Can you now see more complexity in life? Do you re-evaluate relationships? Do you understand your history more?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s always something to learn as we navigate life\\u2019s emotional journeys\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0find the lessons from shame and keep them throughout life.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to read more from Lissy, check out her\\u00a0e-book\\u00a0on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can impact our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1523322002)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17637,5131,'_thumbnail_id','5005'),(17638,5131,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17639,5131,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17640,5132,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17641,5132,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17642,5132,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17643,5132,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17644,5132,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1523322002.jpg\",\"id\":5005,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-257,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"A Psychotherapist Told Us There Are 4 Different Types Of Shame. Here\\u2019s What They Mean\",\"description_text\":\"3 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of the worst, most embarrassing thing that\\u2019s ever happened to you. Are you picturing it? It\\u2019s\\u2026 bloody uncomfortable to look back on, isn\\u2019t it?\\u00a0 It might be\\u00a0that time your date completely ghosted you. When you had to do a work presentation, choked up, and had to sit down. That time your skirt rolled up underneath your bag and you flashed a whole bus full of people\\u2026<\\/p><p>Shame is a universal experience that comes in different scenarios \\u2013 and we all experience it in some shape or form.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And she\\u2019s up there with some of the most unpleasant of feels. Painful, in fact. Like, sometimes it\\u2019s uncomfortable enough to make you feel like\\u00a0you could actually just\\u2026 disappear.<\\/p><p>What you might not know about shame, however, is that there are some common situations where we\\u2019re more likely to feel bad about ourselves \\u2013 and each can affect us in different ways.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we speak to psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and look at everything we never knew we needed to know about shame.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cShame is a universal emotion we feel when we violate social norms. At such moments we feel humiliated, exposed, and small and are unable to look another person straight in the eye.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can feel sick to our stomach, red in the face, and we typically want to hide from everyone.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s a common emotion that everyone will feel, Abrahams describes it as \\u201can underground emotion\\u201d that\\u2019s \\u201cdifferent from other emotions that we can talk about.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Weird, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel or reflect on our behaviour that causes us shame, we can become consumed with believing we \\u2013 as a person \\u2013 are bad,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering if this is just the same as guilt \\u2013 same. But apparently, they\\u2019re actually two very separate emotions.<\\/p><p>While they may seem closely linked, Abrahams said that when we feel guilt, it\\u2019s our behaviour that is usually deemed as \\u2018bad\\u2019, whereas with shame, we don\\u2019t absorb the \\u2018badness\\u2019 into our sense of self, as we do with guilt.<\\/p><p>Shame goes to a deeper level of the psyche, where there\\u2019s a more painful awareness of the self. While shame\\u00a0can be felt in many situations, Abrahams said there is something at the core of shame that is always present \\u2013 a fear of disconnection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cLeading shame expert Brene Brown hits the nail perfectly on the head in her definition that \\u2018shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.\'\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cHer research shows that humans are hard-wired in every way for connection, love and belonging.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While the feeling of shame can be brief and fleeting, it can also be an enduring emotion that can make you feel like\\u00a0you are fundamentally\\u00a0flawed and not \\u2018good enough\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame can exist wherever we believe we\\u2019re flawed, fearing people who are important to us will see us as not up to scratch, and then flick us away,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>How sad!<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans are social animals, as are many mammals. As social animals, we work hard to keep within the bounds of the various communities we belong. We need the feeling of inclusion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s a reason we do this. We want others to see us in a desirable way and our ego helps us create and curate the image of ourselves that we wish to portray.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we behave in a way that\\u2019s out of the social norm, it will tap into our primitive fear that\\u00a0others will find out we\\u2019re not good enough, or unworthy, or unlovable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0and any of these translate to being abandonable. And in our primitive DNA we know that being abandoned by our herd is deadly\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0just as it is for mammals in the wild.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Meaning? We have to stay on top of our game in order to protect ourselves.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe even have our ego telling us to behave in certain ways to protect our identity in public. It works hard to prevent us from being cancelled. Shame is why cancel culture is so powerful.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can brutally judge someone who mis-stepped too far for our liking as unworthy, cut them down and then ostracise them. We become judge and jury, and feel blemish-free and pure in our self-image, implying \\u2018we\\u2019d never behave so poorly\\u2019. Social media has fuelled this exponentially.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some of the most common types of shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to psychotherapist Joseph Burgo, author of\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.amazon.com.au\\/Shame-Free-Yourself-Build-Self-Esteem\\/dp\\/1250151309\\\"><strong>Shame: Free Yourself, Find Joy and Build True Self Esteem<\\/strong><\\/a>,\\u00a0there are four common types of sham, which he refers to as \\u201cshame paradigms\\u201d.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Unrequited love\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams describes one-sided love as one of the most fundamentally\\u00a0shameful experiences, \\u201csuch as a mother who doesn\\u2019t love their child, and the child feels inadequate and lacking.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see this in couple relationships where partners experience the shame of their partner\\u2019s diminishing emotional and sexual connection to them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Exclusion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of that time you weren\\u2019t invited to THAT party. Or when you were left out of the \\u2018group chat\\u2019 on WhatsApp or messenger.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to belong to our community or herd as humans have needed to belong to keep alive. It\\u2019s primitively wired in our mind and body that we are safer within a group and have more protection in numbers,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans on their own in the wild are extremely vulnerable to predators, just like many other mammals. Exclusion\\u00a0is wired into our DNA to symbolise vulnerability and death.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"458afbf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ef6e01\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"06fe96b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Unwanted exposure\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4208444\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52ac754\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6da532f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis shame happens when we feel we\\u2019ve stepped out of our norm in public, fearing judgement. My client Rachel had a relationship with a married man at work. They were caught up in what they felt was the loveliness of their affair until they weren\\u2019t\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0his wife found out.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMonths later, she feels shame about her involvement in this relationship and can\\u2019t reconcile how she \\u2018as an essentially good person\\u2019 could end up in an affair. She\\u2019s mortified by her actions, worries about what her colleagues think of her, and her mind is consumed daily with thoughts about it.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8bbbf4e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4922c23\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52981f2\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Disappointed expectation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"69b4838\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"818f701\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c90d384\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This type of shame is all about falling short of expectations \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s romantically or professionally.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMy client Jerome has a partner who constantly compares him unfavourably to her ex-boyfriend, and he feels diminished and useless,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cGerald wants the world to swallow him up when his partner shakes a finger, deeming him a \\u2018disappointment and embarrassment\\u2019,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cCan you see that in all of\\u00a0these examples, shame is the fear of being perceived as unworthy and abandonable? It\\u2019s a primitive fear that there is something\\u2019s not right about us and others will see it. We can all have these feelings.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d919458\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c21710a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ec2a5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to learn from shame\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0029ec4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"77d2895\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d1a04b4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The good news? These are healthy emotions that everyone has \\u2013 so don\\u2019t feel like it\\u2019s just you. For some reason, though \\u2013 we just don\\u2019t talk about it, making it really hard for people to deal with.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe want to hide from it more than any other emotion. It hates being spoken about. We don\\u2019t want others to know about this part of us, as we fear their harsh judgments of us as inadequate and unworthy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel shame, we can go to great lengths to avoid people, self-isolate and disconnect from others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe also find techniques to disconnect from ourselves, such as finding distractions, or even constructing ego-based stories to try to\\u00a0bolster our fragile ego\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as finding someone to blame, making harsh judgments of others, or minimising our role or responsibility. It\\u2019s awful for us to feel we are somehow\\u00a0\\u2018bad\\u2019 to the core.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Instead of just not dealing with it, Abrahams said when we\\u2019re feeling shame, we need to do the opposite of what shame wants us to do.<\\/p><p>When shame is overwhelming, there are three key things you need to do in order to help yourself learn and move forward.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4b9d236\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6c20018\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9aba557\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Don\\u2019t hide from it\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d1e0edb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6132632\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b30caa0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to talk about it and get it out into the open. \\u201cWe need to expose shame by talking about it with someone who is empathic and understanding. This provides relief,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame survives alone and in secret. When we do the opposite, it cannot survive. Don\\u2019t plaster it on social media but make sure it\\u2019s a safe place to talk about it. Many people talk about their shame in therapy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9ed28a6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"86c35b6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"700b02d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Have self-compassion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"81febf2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e4bb3e1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e5bccf0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAs shame happens between people\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0the best thing we can do is heal it with people. Self-compassion is key because when we\\u2019re able to be gentle with ourselves in the midst of shame, we are more likely to reach out, connect, and experience empathy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b50534c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e701004\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d109fbd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gather the learning from the experience\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bbbbc47\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"94d0d3a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b3b4a8\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you messed up\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0decide to do it differently next time. Ask yourself what you learnt from the experience? Has it made you less judgemental and harsh? Can you now see more complexity in life? Do you re-evaluate relationships? Do you understand your history more?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s always something to learn as we navigate life\\u2019s emotional journeys\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0find the lessons from shame and keep them throughout life.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to read more from Lissy, check out her\\u00a0e-book\\u00a0on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can impact our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1523322002)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17645,5132,'_thumbnail_id','5005'),(17646,5132,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17647,5132,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17648,5133,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17649,5133,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17650,5133,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17651,5133,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17652,5133,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1523322002.jpg\",\"id\":5005,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-257,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"A Psychotherapist Told Us There Are 4 Different Types Of Shame. Here\\u2019s What They Mean\",\"description_text\":\"3 March 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of the worst, most embarrassing thing that\\u2019s ever happened to you. Are you picturing it? It\\u2019s\\u2026 bloody uncomfortable to look back on, isn\\u2019t it?\\u00a0 It might be\\u00a0that time your date completely ghosted you. When you had to do a work presentation, choked up, and had to sit down. That time your skirt rolled up underneath your bag and you flashed a whole bus full of people\\u2026<\\/p><p>Shame is a universal experience that comes in different scenarios \\u2013 and we all experience it in some shape or form.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And she\\u2019s up there with some of the most unpleasant of feels. Painful, in fact. Like, sometimes it\\u2019s uncomfortable enough to make you feel like\\u00a0you could actually just\\u2026 disappear.<\\/p><p>What you might not know about shame, however, is that there are some common situations where we\\u2019re more likely to feel bad about ourselves \\u2013 and each can affect us in different ways.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we speak to psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and look at everything we never knew we needed to know about shame.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cShame is a universal emotion we feel when we violate social norms. At such moments we feel humiliated, exposed, and small and are unable to look another person straight in the eye.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can feel sick to our stomach, red in the face, and we typically want to hide from everyone.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s a common emotion that everyone will feel, Abrahams describes it as \\u201can underground emotion\\u201d that\\u2019s \\u201cdifferent from other emotions that we can talk about.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Weird, huh?<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel or reflect on our behaviour that causes us shame, we can become consumed with believing we \\u2013 as a person \\u2013 are bad,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering if this is just the same as guilt \\u2013 same. But apparently, they\\u2019re actually two very separate emotions.<\\/p><p>While they may seem closely linked, Abrahams said that when we feel guilt, it\\u2019s our behaviour that is usually deemed as \\u2018bad\\u2019, whereas with shame, we don\\u2019t absorb the \\u2018badness\\u2019 into our sense of self, as we do with guilt.<\\/p><p>Shame goes to a deeper level of the psyche, where there\\u2019s a more painful awareness of the self. While shame\\u00a0can be felt in many situations, Abrahams said there is something at the core of shame that is always present \\u2013 a fear of disconnection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cLeading shame expert Brene Brown hits the nail perfectly on the head in her definition that \\u2018shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.\'\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cHer research shows that humans are hard-wired in every way for connection, love and belonging.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While the feeling of shame can be brief and fleeting, it can also be an enduring emotion that can make you feel like\\u00a0you are fundamentally\\u00a0flawed and not \\u2018good enough\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame can exist wherever we believe we\\u2019re flawed, fearing people who are important to us will see us as not up to scratch, and then flick us away,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>How sad!<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans are social animals, as are many mammals. As social animals, we work hard to keep within the bounds of the various communities we belong. We need the feeling of inclusion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s a reason we do this. We want others to see us in a desirable way and our ego helps us create and curate the image of ourselves that we wish to portray.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we behave in a way that\\u2019s out of the social norm, it will tap into our primitive fear that\\u00a0others will find out we\\u2019re not good enough, or unworthy, or unlovable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0and any of these translate to being abandonable. And in our primitive DNA we know that being abandoned by our herd is deadly\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0just as it is for mammals in the wild.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Meaning? We have to stay on top of our game in order to protect ourselves.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe even have our ego telling us to behave in certain ways to protect our identity in public. It works hard to prevent us from being cancelled. Shame is why cancel culture is so powerful.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can brutally judge someone who mis-stepped too far for our liking as unworthy, cut them down and then ostracise them. We become judge and jury, and feel blemish-free and pure in our self-image, implying \\u2018we\\u2019d never behave so poorly\\u2019. Social media has fuelled this exponentially.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some of the most common types of shame?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to psychotherapist Joseph Burgo, author of\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.amazon.com.au\\/Shame-Free-Yourself-Build-Self-Esteem\\/dp\\/1250151309\\\"><strong>Shame: Free Yourself, Find Joy and Build True Self Esteem<\\/strong><\\/a>,\\u00a0there are four common types of sham, which he refers to as \\u201cshame paradigms\\u201d.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Unrequited love\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams describes one-sided love as one of the most fundamentally\\u00a0shameful experiences, \\u201csuch as a mother who doesn\\u2019t love their child, and the child feels inadequate and lacking.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see this in couple relationships where partners experience the shame of their partner\\u2019s diminishing emotional and sexual connection to them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Exclusion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Think of that time you weren\\u2019t invited to THAT party. Or when you were left out of the \\u2018group chat\\u2019 on WhatsApp or messenger.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to belong to our community or herd as humans have needed to belong to keep alive. It\\u2019s primitively wired in our mind and body that we are safer within a group and have more protection in numbers,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans on their own in the wild are extremely vulnerable to predators, just like many other mammals. Exclusion\\u00a0is wired into our DNA to symbolise vulnerability and death.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"458afbf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ef6e01\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"06fe96b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Unwanted exposure\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4208444\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52ac754\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6da532f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis shame happens when we feel we\\u2019ve stepped out of our norm in public, fearing judgement. My client Rachel had a relationship with a married man at work. They were caught up in what they felt was the loveliness of their affair until they weren\\u2019t\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0his wife found out.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMonths later, she feels shame about her involvement in this relationship and can\\u2019t reconcile how she \\u2018as an essentially good person\\u2019 could end up in an affair. She\\u2019s mortified by her actions, worries about what her colleagues think of her, and her mind is consumed daily with thoughts about it.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8bbbf4e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4922c23\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"52981f2\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Disappointed expectation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"69b4838\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"818f701\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c90d384\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This type of shame is all about falling short of expectations \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s romantically or professionally.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMy client Jerome has a partner who constantly compares him unfavourably to her ex-boyfriend, and he feels diminished and useless,\\u201d shares Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cGerald wants the world to swallow him up when his partner shakes a finger, deeming him a \\u2018disappointment and embarrassment\\u2019,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cCan you see that in all of\\u00a0these examples, shame is the fear of being perceived as unworthy and abandonable? It\\u2019s a primitive fear that there is something\\u2019s not right about us and others will see it. We can all have these feelings.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d919458\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c21710a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ec2a5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to learn from shame\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0029ec4\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"77d2895\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d1a04b4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>The good news? These are healthy emotions that everyone has \\u2013 so don\\u2019t feel like it\\u2019s just you. For some reason, though \\u2013 we just don\\u2019t talk about it, making it really hard for people to deal with.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe want to hide from it more than any other emotion. It hates being spoken about. We don\\u2019t want others to know about this part of us, as we fear their harsh judgments of us as inadequate and unworthy,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we feel shame, we can go to great lengths to avoid people, self-isolate and disconnect from others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe also find techniques to disconnect from ourselves, such as finding distractions, or even constructing ego-based stories to try to\\u00a0bolster our fragile ego\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as finding someone to blame, making harsh judgments of others, or minimising our role or responsibility. It\\u2019s awful for us to feel we are somehow\\u00a0\\u2018bad\\u2019 to the core.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Instead of just not dealing with it, Abrahams said when we\\u2019re feeling shame, we need to do the opposite of what shame wants us to do.<\\/p><p>When shame is overwhelming, there are three key things you need to do in order to help yourself learn and move forward.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"4b9d236\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6c20018\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9aba557\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Don\\u2019t hide from it\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d1e0edb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6132632\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b30caa0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to talk about it and get it out into the open. \\u201cWe need to expose shame by talking about it with someone who is empathic and understanding. This provides relief,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cShame survives alone and in secret. When we do the opposite, it cannot survive. Don\\u2019t plaster it on social media but make sure it\\u2019s a safe place to talk about it. Many people talk about their shame in therapy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9ed28a6\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"86c35b6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"700b02d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Have self-compassion\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"81febf2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e4bb3e1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e5bccf0\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAs shame happens between people\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0the best thing we can do is heal it with people. Self-compassion is key because when we\\u2019re able to be gentle with ourselves in the midst of shame, we are more likely to reach out, connect, and experience empathy.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b50534c\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e701004\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d109fbd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gather the learning from the experience\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bbbbc47\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"94d0d3a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b3b4a8\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIf you messed up\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0decide to do it differently next time. Ask yourself what you learnt from the experience? Has it made you less judgemental and harsh? Can you now see more complexity in life? Do you re-evaluate relationships? Do you understand your history more?\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s always something to learn as we navigate life\\u2019s emotional journeys\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0find the lessons from shame and keep them throughout life.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you would like to read more from Lissy, check out her\\u00a0e-book\\u00a0on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can impact our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17662,5134,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(17663,5134,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17664,5134,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17665,5135,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17666,5135,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17667,5135,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17668,5135,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17669,5135,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17670,5135,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(17671,5135,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17672,5135,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17673,5136,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17674,5136,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17675,5136,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17676,5136,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17677,5136,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17678,5136,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(17679,5136,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17680,5136,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17681,5076,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:21;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:21;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:21;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:7;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:10;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:10;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:9;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:9;s:11:\"header_size\";i:9;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:9;}}}}}'),(17682,5137,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17683,5137,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17684,5137,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17685,5137,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17686,5137,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1385860784-768x511-1.jpg\",\"id\":5003,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-340,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"4 Things To Do When You And Your Partner Have VERY Different Love Languages\",\"description_text\":\"4 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Quick one: How do you show love to your partner? Cuddles? Quality time? Compliments?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because as you might already know, according to\\u00a0The 5 Love Languages\\u00a0by marriage counsellor Gary Chapman, there are some very different principles of communicating love.<\\/p><p>This means how we express and receive love might be totally opposite to how our partner displays love to us, which can cause some\\u2026 difficulties.<\\/p><p>But just because you and your S.O. speak different\\u00a0love languages, it doesn\\u2019t mean everything is going to go to s**t. Nah. It just means you have to work a little harder in communicating what you both need from each other.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering where to start, we asked couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0for everything we need to know about coping with different love languages.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different love languages?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Woah! Hold up. Before we get into it, it\\u2019s probably worth giving you a quick rundown on what the different\\u00a0love languages\\u00a0actually are, right?<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cThese love language categories offer a helpful structure for capturing the differences in partner-to-partner caring gestures and loving behaviour.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us would fit into many categories, and some of us have one dominant category. They add a dimension to couple relationships that explain why some couples have a smoother or bumpier ride together.\\u201d<\\/p><p>But don\\u2019t worry, figuring out your partner\\u2019s love language is actually\\u00a0a lot\\u00a0easier than you might think. Seriously, it is! All you have to do is pay close attention to what they do and say, and you\\u2019ll be able to suss it out.<\\/p><p>Below are the five different love languages, and what they mean -<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Words of affirmation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First up? Spoken and written forms of affirmation. \\u201cWritten forms can be notes, texts, social media posts,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThese words allow them to feel appreciated, valued, desired, admired, loved or cared about. They never tire of receiving these messages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Quality time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This second category obviously relates to partners wishing to spend time together. \\u201cThis could be quality time on a date or even conversing where both partners have focussed attention and are present without distractions,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gifts\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cChapman calls these the \\u2018visual symbols of love,\'\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThe one offering the gift has had their partner in mind throughout the experience and made them a priority. Gifts can differ in size or monetary value.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Acts of service\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis category of love language is for people who like to show their love by helping their partner or by making life nicer for them\\u00a0in some way,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey take an action as a gesture of love. These acts are performed to acknowledge one\\u2019s partner and their value. People who do acts of service see themselves as a resource and are able to offer themselves up as part of the solution to problems or situations. They don\\u2019t need to be asked.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Physical touch\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In this category, Abrahams said partners feel love and connection through the physical and sexual realm and want this prioritised in the relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPhysical touch is a primitive response for animals with their offspring, and this can be comforting, protective and bonding. Many of us use this love language from childhood, adding the sexual dimension into our couple relationship,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What to do when you and your partner have different love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to be aware that it\\u2019s common to be with someone who speaks a different love language to you. You don\\u2019t need to speak the same language in order to have a successful relationship.<\\/p><p>It is important, however, to know the differences.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout understanding these differences, partners can easily become resentful, lonely, or frustrated. They can even destabilise the relationship,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the differences can feel as if one\\u2019s partner is not truly in the relationship. If we don\\u2019t register our partner\\u2019s love gestures or words of affirmation, then our ego may construct narratives of how unloving or uncaring they are.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cTragically, when these feelings take over, it can even lead to separation and divorce. This is why it\\u2019s important to acknowledge and register each other\\u2019s gestures of love.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you and your partner have different ways of showing love and affection and if it\\u2019s creating a rift of misunderstanding in your relationship, here are a few things that can help...\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Listen to your partner\\u2019s comments on the relationship\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\\u2019s normal for partners to have different love languages and express feelings differently, the key is to communicate openly with each other about what you need.<\\/p><p>Without this, they don\\u2019t know what you want from them and you don\\u2019t know what they need from you.<\\/p><p>So, how do you know if you\\u2019ve been missing important information they need you to know?<\\/p><p>Abrahams outlines the below signs -<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- \\u201cDo they tell you they feel lonely or bored in the relationship? They may miss having quality time with you and truly feeling connected,\\u201d she said,<br \\/>- \\u201cDo they comment about the lack of physical intimacy in the relationship or that it\\u2019s one-sided? Do they comment that physical intimacy has gone and is only there when you want sex?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to surprise them with gifts? Are they feeling you don\\u2019t think about them in your absence? Do you? If yes, how do you convey this to them?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to say the words, \\u2018I love you\\u2019 or \\u2018You look beautiful\\u2019? Do they want to hear how special they are or your positive feelings about them? Are you assuming they pick this up day-to-day?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDoes your partner feel resentful of making the effort and doing things for you? Are you missing their acts of service?\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Ask your partner about their love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Again, if you don\\u2019t understand how your partner shows love, you\\u2019re going to have a bad time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou may be missing many loving gestures as they are not on your radar,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cYou may also become dismissive or resentful of your partner if you don\\u2019t put these gestures into the equation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI\\u2019ve been guilty of this as my partner shows love through acts of service. On the weekend he brings me a cup of coffee in bed, which I love. He also does a huge grocery shop which I dislike doing.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s easy to take these for granted as they can become part of the normal chore distribution in a household, however, he started them to support and care for me.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Share your love languages with your partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThey need to become aware of your love languages, so they understand you better. It\\u2019s important they understand you and your gestures,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, many people like to cook a meal for their partner. This takes thought, effort, and time. It\\u2019s easy to overlook this gesture of love. Maybe they are not aware of yours.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f1c168d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2c14c52\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7937b54\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Be respectful of differences\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bfadae\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a07bf37\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d75100f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one\\u2019s important, you guys. While we can learn to communicate and compromise, you shouldn\\u2019t necessarily\\u00a0try to change a person\\u2019s love language.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNo one\\u2019s category of love language is right or wrong, just different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe respectful of their way and take care not to diminish their gestures as not relevant or not good enough for you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"82c8611\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cad8a53\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"72f5227\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why it\\u2019s important to support each other\\u2019s love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"1c817fc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"648e6e2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"87ab37f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When we don\\u2019t receive the love the way we want it, Abrahams said we can become dissatisfied or hurt and even controlling to get what we want.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are a few negative things that might happen if you choose to ignore each other\\u2019s love languages -\\u00a0<\\/p><ul><li style=\\\"list-style-type: none;\\\"><ul><li>- \\u201cFor partners with a dominant love language of words of affirmation, without these acknowledgments, they may feel unloved, unlovable, or lonely.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners who value quality time, they can easily feel slighted or distressed if their partner doesn\\u2019t support this. If their partner is easily distracted or unfocused, this can be experienced as not caring. They may conclude their partner may not want to be with them.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners have a love language of offering gifts to show love, without their partner being similar they may feel not thought about or not valued by their partner. This can be distressing.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners who value physical touch are left too untouched, they can feel lonely and undesired. This can be experienced as personal and hurtful.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners strong on acts of service they may appear selfish and unsupportive. This can harm the relationship.\\u201d<\\/li><\\/ul><\\/li><\\/ul><p>Importantly, Abrahams notes that a lot of how we communicate love stems from our past experiences and our childhood.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSo, it\\u2019s important to remember that it\\u2019s not our partner\\u2019s job to \\u2018fix\\u2019 our need for cuddles or how we feel loved up by receiving gifts,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere is also no way they will meet all of\\u00a0these needs and we need to be careful not to blame them when they can\\u2019t or don\\u2019t meet them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you sense you have childhood needs that still hurt you then it\\u2019s important to heal those, potentially through therapy, podcasts, or books. This means your relationship won\\u2019t be burdened by these unmet needs of the past being imposed in the present.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17687,5137,'_thumbnail_id','5003'),(17688,5137,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17689,5137,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17690,5138,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17691,5138,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17692,5138,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17693,5138,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17694,5138,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1385860784-768x511-1.jpg\",\"id\":5003,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-340,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"4 Things To Do When You And Your Partner Have VERY Different Love Languages\",\"description_text\":\"4 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Quick one: How do you show love to your partner? Cuddles? Quality time? Compliments?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because as you might already know, according to\\u00a0The 5 Love Languages\\u00a0by marriage counsellor Gary Chapman, there are some very different principles of communicating love.<\\/p><p>This means how we express and receive love might be totally opposite to how our partner displays love to us, which can cause some\\u2026 difficulties.<\\/p><p>But just because you and your S.O. speak different\\u00a0love languages, it doesn\\u2019t mean everything is going to go to s**t. Nah. It just means you have to work a little harder in communicating what you both need from each other.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering where to start, we asked couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0for everything we need to know about coping with different love languages.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different love languages?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Woah! Hold up. Before we get into it, it\\u2019s probably worth giving you a quick rundown on what the different\\u00a0love languages\\u00a0actually are, right?<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cThese love language categories offer a helpful structure for capturing the differences in partner-to-partner caring gestures and loving behaviour.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us would fit into many categories, and some of us have one dominant category. They add a dimension to couple relationships that explain why some couples have a smoother or bumpier ride together.\\u201d<\\/p><p>But don\\u2019t worry, figuring out your partner\\u2019s love language is actually\\u00a0a lot\\u00a0easier than you might think. Seriously, it is! All you have to do is pay close attention to what they do and say, and you\\u2019ll be able to suss it out.<\\/p><p>Below are the five different love languages, and what they mean -<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Words of affirmation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First up? Spoken and written forms of affirmation. \\u201cWritten forms can be notes, texts, social media posts,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThese words allow them to feel appreciated, valued, desired, admired, loved or cared about. They never tire of receiving these messages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Quality time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This second category obviously relates to partners wishing to spend time together. \\u201cThis could be quality time on a date or even conversing where both partners have focussed attention and are present without distractions,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gifts\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cChapman calls these the \\u2018visual symbols of love,\'\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThe one offering the gift has had their partner in mind throughout the experience and made them a priority. Gifts can differ in size or monetary value.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Acts of service\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis category of love language is for people who like to show their love by helping their partner or by making life nicer for them\\u00a0in some way,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey take an action as a gesture of love. These acts are performed to acknowledge one\\u2019s partner and their value. People who do acts of service see themselves as a resource and are able to offer themselves up as part of the solution to problems or situations. They don\\u2019t need to be asked.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Physical touch\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In this category, Abrahams said partners feel love and connection through the physical and sexual realm and want this prioritised in the relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPhysical touch is a primitive response for animals with their offspring, and this can be comforting, protective and bonding. Many of us use this love language from childhood, adding the sexual dimension into our couple relationship,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What to do when you and your partner have different love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to be aware that it\\u2019s common to be with someone who speaks a different love language to you. You don\\u2019t need to speak the same language in order to have a successful relationship.<\\/p><p>It is important, however, to know the differences.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout understanding these differences, partners can easily become resentful, lonely, or frustrated. They can even destabilise the relationship,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the differences can feel as if one\\u2019s partner is not truly in the relationship. If we don\\u2019t register our partner\\u2019s love gestures or words of affirmation, then our ego may construct narratives of how unloving or uncaring they are.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cTragically, when these feelings take over, it can even lead to separation and divorce. This is why it\\u2019s important to acknowledge and register each other\\u2019s gestures of love.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you and your partner have different ways of showing love and affection and if it\\u2019s creating a rift of misunderstanding in your relationship, here are a few things that can help...\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Listen to your partner\\u2019s comments on the relationship\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\\u2019s normal for partners to have different love languages and express feelings differently, the key is to communicate openly with each other about what you need.<\\/p><p>Without this, they don\\u2019t know what you want from them and you don\\u2019t know what they need from you.<\\/p><p>So, how do you know if you\\u2019ve been missing important information they need you to know?<\\/p><p>Abrahams outlines the below signs -<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- \\u201cDo they tell you they feel lonely or bored in the relationship? They may miss having quality time with you and truly feeling connected,\\u201d she said,<br \\/>- \\u201cDo they comment about the lack of physical intimacy in the relationship or that it\\u2019s one-sided? Do they comment that physical intimacy has gone and is only there when you want sex?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to surprise them with gifts? Are they feeling you don\\u2019t think about them in your absence? Do you? If yes, how do you convey this to them?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to say the words, \\u2018I love you\\u2019 or \\u2018You look beautiful\\u2019? Do they want to hear how special they are or your positive feelings about them? Are you assuming they pick this up day-to-day?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDoes your partner feel resentful of making the effort and doing things for you? Are you missing their acts of service?\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Ask your partner about their love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Again, if you don\\u2019t understand how your partner shows love, you\\u2019re going to have a bad time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou may be missing many loving gestures as they are not on your radar,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cYou may also become dismissive or resentful of your partner if you don\\u2019t put these gestures into the equation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI\\u2019ve been guilty of this as my partner shows love through acts of service. On the weekend he brings me a cup of coffee in bed, which I love. He also does a huge grocery shop which I dislike doing.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s easy to take these for granted as they can become part of the normal chore distribution in a household, however, he started them to support and care for me.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Share your love languages with your partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThey need to become aware of your love languages, so they understand you better. It\\u2019s important they understand you and your gestures,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, many people like to cook a meal for their partner. This takes thought, effort, and time. It\\u2019s easy to overlook this gesture of love. Maybe they are not aware of yours.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f1c168d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2c14c52\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7937b54\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Be respectful of differences\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bfadae\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a07bf37\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d75100f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one\\u2019s important, you guys. While we can learn to communicate and compromise, you shouldn\\u2019t necessarily\\u00a0try to change a person\\u2019s love language.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNo one\\u2019s category of love language is right or wrong, just different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe respectful of their way and take care not to diminish their gestures as not relevant or not good enough for you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"82c8611\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cad8a53\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"72f5227\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why it\\u2019s important to support each other\\u2019s love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"1c817fc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"648e6e2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"87ab37f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When we don\\u2019t receive the love the way we want it, Abrahams said we can become dissatisfied or hurt and even controlling to get what we want.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are a few negative things that might happen if you choose to ignore each other\\u2019s love languages -\\u00a0<\\/p><ul><li style=\\\"list-style-type: none;\\\"><ul><li>- \\u201cFor partners with a dominant love language of words of affirmation, without these acknowledgments, they may feel unloved, unlovable, or lonely.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners who value quality time, they can easily feel slighted or distressed if their partner doesn\\u2019t support this. If their partner is easily distracted or unfocused, this can be experienced as not caring. They may conclude their partner may not want to be with them.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners have a love language of offering gifts to show love, without their partner being similar they may feel not thought about or not valued by their partner. This can be distressing.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners who value physical touch are left too untouched, they can feel lonely and undesired. This can be experienced as personal and hurtful.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners strong on acts of service they may appear selfish and unsupportive. This can harm the relationship.\\u201d<\\/li><\\/ul><\\/li><\\/ul><p>Importantly, Abrahams notes that a lot of how we communicate love stems from our past experiences and our childhood.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSo, it\\u2019s important to remember that it\\u2019s not our partner\\u2019s job to \\u2018fix\\u2019 our need for cuddles or how we feel loved up by receiving gifts,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere is also no way they will meet all of\\u00a0these needs and we need to be careful not to blame them when they can\\u2019t or don\\u2019t meet them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you sense you have childhood needs that still hurt you then it\\u2019s important to heal those, potentially through therapy, podcasts, or books. This means your relationship won\\u2019t be burdened by these unmet needs of the past being imposed in the present.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17695,5138,'_thumbnail_id','5003'),(17696,5138,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17697,5138,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17698,5139,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17699,5139,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17700,5139,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17701,5139,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17702,5139,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1385860784-768x511-1.jpg\",\"id\":5003,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-340,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"4 Things To Do When You And Your Partner Have VERY Different Love Languages\",\"description_text\":\"4 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Quick one: How do you show love to your partner? Cuddles? Quality time? Compliments?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because as you might already know, according to\\u00a0The 5 Love Languages\\u00a0by marriage counsellor Gary Chapman, there are some very different principles of communicating love.<\\/p><p>This means how we express and receive love might be totally opposite to how our partner displays love to us, which can cause some\\u2026 difficulties.<\\/p><p>But just because you and your S.O. speak different\\u00a0love languages, it doesn\\u2019t mean everything is going to go to s**t. Nah. It just means you have to work a little harder in communicating what you both need from each other.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering where to start, we asked couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0for everything we need to know about coping with different love languages.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different love languages?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Woah! Hold up. Before we get into it, it\\u2019s probably worth giving you a quick rundown on what the different\\u00a0love languages\\u00a0actually are, right?<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cThese love language categories offer a helpful structure for capturing the differences in partner-to-partner caring gestures and loving behaviour.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us would fit into many categories, and some of us have one dominant category. They add a dimension to couple relationships that explain why some couples have a smoother or bumpier ride together.\\u201d<\\/p><p>But don\\u2019t worry, figuring out your partner\\u2019s love language is actually\\u00a0a lot\\u00a0easier than you might think. Seriously, it is! All you have to do is pay close attention to what they do and say, and you\\u2019ll be able to suss it out.<\\/p><p>Below are the five different love languages, and what they mean -<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Words of affirmation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First up? Spoken and written forms of affirmation. \\u201cWritten forms can be notes, texts, social media posts,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThese words allow them to feel appreciated, valued, desired, admired, loved or cared about. They never tire of receiving these messages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Quality time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This second category obviously relates to partners wishing to spend time together. \\u201cThis could be quality time on a date or even conversing where both partners have focussed attention and are present without distractions,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gifts\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cChapman calls these the \\u2018visual symbols of love,\'\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThe one offering the gift has had their partner in mind throughout the experience and made them a priority. Gifts can differ in size or monetary value.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Acts of service\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis category of love language is for people who like to show their love by helping their partner or by making life nicer for them\\u00a0in some way,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey take an action as a gesture of love. These acts are performed to acknowledge one\\u2019s partner and their value. People who do acts of service see themselves as a resource and are able to offer themselves up as part of the solution to problems or situations. They don\\u2019t need to be asked.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Physical touch\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In this category, Abrahams said partners feel love and connection through the physical and sexual realm and want this prioritised in the relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPhysical touch is a primitive response for animals with their offspring, and this can be comforting, protective and bonding. Many of us use this love language from childhood, adding the sexual dimension into our couple relationship,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What to do when you and your partner have different love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to be aware that it\\u2019s common to be with someone who speaks a different love language to you. You don\\u2019t need to speak the same language in order to have a successful relationship.<\\/p><p>It is important, however, to know the differences.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout understanding these differences, partners can easily become resentful, lonely, or frustrated. They can even destabilise the relationship,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the differences can feel as if one\\u2019s partner is not truly in the relationship. If we don\\u2019t register our partner\\u2019s love gestures or words of affirmation, then our ego may construct narratives of how unloving or uncaring they are.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cTragically, when these feelings take over, it can even lead to separation and divorce. This is why it\\u2019s important to acknowledge and register each other\\u2019s gestures of love.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you and your partner have different ways of showing love and affection and if it\\u2019s creating a rift of misunderstanding in your relationship, here are a few things that can help...\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Listen to your partner\\u2019s comments on the relationship\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\\u2019s normal for partners to have different love languages and express feelings differently, the key is to communicate openly with each other about what you need.<\\/p><p>Without this, they don\\u2019t know what you want from them and you don\\u2019t know what they need from you.<\\/p><p>So, how do you know if you\\u2019ve been missing important information they need you to know?<\\/p><p>Abrahams outlines the below signs -<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- \\u201cDo they tell you they feel lonely or bored in the relationship? They may miss having quality time with you and truly feeling connected,\\u201d she said,<br \\/>- \\u201cDo they comment about the lack of physical intimacy in the relationship or that it\\u2019s one-sided? Do they comment that physical intimacy has gone and is only there when you want sex?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to surprise them with gifts? Are they feeling you don\\u2019t think about them in your absence? Do you? If yes, how do you convey this to them?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to say the words, \\u2018I love you\\u2019 or \\u2018You look beautiful\\u2019? Do they want to hear how special they are or your positive feelings about them? Are you assuming they pick this up day-to-day?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDoes your partner feel resentful of making the effort and doing things for you? Are you missing their acts of service?\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Ask your partner about their love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Again, if you don\\u2019t understand how your partner shows love, you\\u2019re going to have a bad time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou may be missing many loving gestures as they are not on your radar,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cYou may also become dismissive or resentful of your partner if you don\\u2019t put these gestures into the equation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI\\u2019ve been guilty of this as my partner shows love through acts of service. On the weekend he brings me a cup of coffee in bed, which I love. He also does a huge grocery shop which I dislike doing.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s easy to take these for granted as they can become part of the normal chore distribution in a household, however, he started them to support and care for me.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Share your love languages with your partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThey need to become aware of your love languages, so they understand you better. It\\u2019s important they understand you and your gestures,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, many people like to cook a meal for their partner. This takes thought, effort, and time. It\\u2019s easy to overlook this gesture of love. Maybe they are not aware of yours.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f1c168d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2c14c52\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7937b54\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Be respectful of differences\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bfadae\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a07bf37\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d75100f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one\\u2019s important, you guys. While we can learn to communicate and compromise, you shouldn\\u2019t necessarily\\u00a0try to change a person\\u2019s love language.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNo one\\u2019s category of love language is right or wrong, just different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe respectful of their way and take care not to diminish their gestures as not relevant or not good enough for you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"82c8611\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cad8a53\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"72f5227\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why it\\u2019s important to support each other\\u2019s love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"1c817fc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"648e6e2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"87ab37f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When we don\\u2019t receive the love the way we want it, Abrahams said we can become dissatisfied or hurt and even controlling to get what we want.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are a few negative things that might happen if you choose to ignore each other\\u2019s love languages -\\u00a0<\\/p><ul><li style=\\\"list-style-type: none;\\\"><ul><li>- \\u201cFor partners with a dominant love language of words of affirmation, without these acknowledgments, they may feel unloved, unlovable, or lonely.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners who value quality time, they can easily feel slighted or distressed if their partner doesn\\u2019t support this. If their partner is easily distracted or unfocused, this can be experienced as not caring. They may conclude their partner may not want to be with them.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners have a love language of offering gifts to show love, without their partner being similar they may feel not thought about or not valued by their partner. This can be distressing.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners who value physical touch are left too untouched, they can feel lonely and undesired. This can be experienced as personal and hurtful.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners strong on acts of service they may appear selfish and unsupportive. This can harm the relationship.\\u201d<\\/li><\\/ul><\\/li><\\/ul><p>Importantly, Abrahams notes that a lot of how we communicate love stems from our past experiences and our childhood.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSo, it\\u2019s important to remember that it\\u2019s not our partner\\u2019s job to \\u2018fix\\u2019 our need for cuddles or how we feel loved up by receiving gifts,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere is also no way they will meet all of\\u00a0these needs and we need to be careful not to blame them when they can\\u2019t or don\\u2019t meet them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you sense you have childhood needs that still hurt you then it\\u2019s important to heal those, potentially through therapy, podcasts, or books. This means your relationship won\\u2019t be burdened by these unmet needs of the past being imposed in the present.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17703,5139,'_thumbnail_id','5003'),(17704,5139,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17705,5139,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17706,5084,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:10;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17707,5140,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17708,5140,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17709,5140,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17710,5140,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17711,5140,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_479612449-768x513-1.jpg\",\"id\":5002,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-281,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"12 rules that will help deepen your relationship\",\"description_text\":\"19 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Beyond the cute Instagram posts and meme tagging, relationships can be fickle AF. Because even if you\\u2019re head over heels for someone, there\\u2019s still going to be those s**tty moments of uncertainty, frustration, and confusion.<\\/p><p>But working on having a deeper relationship with your partner and ensuring you have a strong connection will ultimately mean that during these kinds of moments, you\\u2019ll be able to work through it together.<\\/p><p>As with most relationship things, it all starts with the one key need:\\u00a0communication.<\\/p><p>While it takes time and effort, the good news is that it doesn\\u2019t have to be difficult. And over time, you\\u2019ll find you have fewer lows \\u2013 all thanks to your connection.<\\/p><p>Here are 12 rules that will help deepen your relationship, according to couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Look after yourself\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to being in a relationship, we can often end up spending so much of our time and energy on the other person, that many of us lose sight of ourselves and take the back seat.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is especially the case if we do not have a strong enough sense of self,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cI\\u2019ve seen many people become preoccupied with their partner and their needs and neglect their own.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Sad!<\\/p><p>Abrahams said one of the best ways we can\\u00a0improve our relationship\\u00a0is by bringing our healthiest selves into the relationship and maintaining this \\u2013 so try to concentrate on developing yourself and who you are before focusing on someone else.<\\/p><p>Go on, you got this!<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to look after our mind, body, and spirit,\\u201d reminds Abrahams. \\u201cWhen we do this, we keep toxicity at bay so we can spend our time connecting and being intimate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Check your ego\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>That voice inside your head? That\\u2019s your ego. And it can do a lot of\\u00a0 things \\u00a0to a relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cOur ego holds our conscious and unconscious beliefs and expectations about relationships. Think of it as a relational template that we operate from,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo deepen our relationship with our partner, we need to remember that our relational template will be different from theirs.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there will always be a gap between our templates that we need to resolve \\u2013 and that\\u2019s okay.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat matters is how well we both navigate the gap. If we can discuss and work through difficulties, we will deepen the relationship. However, if the gap causes us fear and anxiety, then we may have a lot of conflicts instead.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Keep sexual intimacy on the agenda\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>You know how it gets. Life is busy. There\\u2019s work. Kids. Social engagements. Netflix. Sometimes it seems like relationships (and intimacy) get placed on the back burner, while we go about our business and focus on all the glorious stresses daily life has to offer.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have busy lives with many competing demands\\u00a0at any given moment. This is even more the case if we have children. We need to take care as\\u00a0sexual intimacy\\u00a0can decrease quickly in couple relationships,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s okay to be too tired to have sex at times,\\u00a0if we are too tired too often it can really harm the relationship. Without this, there\\u2019s a kind of\\u2026 gap.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt reveals that our relationship is at the bottom of our priority list. I believe this is a huge mistake. This breeds loneliness, shame about feeling undesirable, or shame about being a low- or\\u00a0no-sex couple.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSex is what\\u00a0makes the couple relationship different from other relationships, and without it, we can feel like flatmates or siblings. Sex is often a special glue that deepens our connection and holds a relationship together.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Keep emotional intimacy alive\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>And it\\u2019s not just sexual intimacy \\u2013 the same goes for\\u00a0emotional\\u00a0intimacy, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we take our eyes off emotional intimacy in our\\u00a0couple relationship, we open the door to disharmony and conflict,\\u201d said Abrahams, who said all humans need connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe are social animals, and connection with our partner helps us feel safe and secure in the world.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout the emotional connection, we no longer feel safe. We can feel lonely, depressed, or anxious that our relationship is in trouble or may even end. Emotional connection and intimacy is a crucial ingredient for a deeper relationship.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Focus and get in sync\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>How much time do you spend together after work? On the weekends? Be honest.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIn a world that continuously competes for our attention, we can find it difficult to pay attention and listen to our partner. We have work emails coming in, Netflix programs to watch, or our mobile notifying us every other second to pay attention,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When this happens, Abrahams said we may lose sight of our partner\\u2019s need to communicate with us.<\\/p><p>When you create a fulfilling routine with your partner, you\\u2019ll find you\\u2019re able to spend more quality time together and reconnect with one another.<\\/p><p>It could be as simple as going for a walk together after work, or waking up at the same time and making breakfast together in the morning.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey need us to focus, listen, and get in sync with them. This will deepen our relationship as we are showing them that\\u00a0we value, love, and respect them above everything else,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will feel a deeper connection with us too. The opposite damages relationships. When we don\\u2019t focus or pretend to listen, our partner can tell feel we\\u2019re not properly with them, and this often causes upset or anger.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Go to couples therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another way to deepen your connection with your partner is to get to know them through the help of a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be life-transforming as couples therapy allows you to understand why you both behave or think as you do, and where you are so different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTherapy also helps you both understand where these thoughts and behaviours came from. This experience will stay with you forever and have such a positive impact on you both for the years ahead.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. Honest communication\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Honesty is one of the biggest core values every couple needs in their relationship \\u2013 without it, things will kind of just fall apart.<\\/p><p>Opening up and being truthful with your partner about what you both want from the relationship, is key to establishing a strong foundation for trust and connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo have a deeper relationship with your partner it\\u2019s important to be honest with them about what\\u2019s important to you and the relationship,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe mindful that honesty can connect you both, however, the way you deliver your message may disconnect you. To deepen your relationship, connect respectfully and kindly as you share your viewpoint with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Look in the mirror\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>To be honest with someone and be able to deepen your relationship with your partner, it\\u2019s essential to know yourself and your intentions.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cHave an honest look in the mirror to see if you would want to have a partner like you. We all have areas we could pull up our socks.\\u201d<\\/p><p><em>Guilty!<\\/em><\\/p><p>\\u201cReflect on whether removing resentment, complaining, sulking or snapping at them would improve the relationship. Reflect on areas you could offer more support, be kinder, or do more to improve the functioning of the home.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17712,5140,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(17713,5140,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17714,5140,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17715,5141,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17716,5141,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17717,5141,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17718,5141,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17719,5141,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_479612449-768x513-1.jpg\",\"id\":5002,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-281,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"12 rules that will help deepen your relationship\",\"description_text\":\"19 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Beyond the cute Instagram posts and meme tagging, relationships can be fickle AF. Because even if you\\u2019re head over heels for someone, there\\u2019s still going to be those s**tty moments of uncertainty, frustration, and confusion.<\\/p><p>But working on having a deeper relationship with your partner and ensuring you have a strong connection will ultimately mean that during these kinds of moments, you\\u2019ll be able to work through it together.<\\/p><p>As with most relationship things, it all starts with the one key need:\\u00a0communication.<\\/p><p>While it takes time and effort, the good news is that it doesn\\u2019t have to be difficult. And over time, you\\u2019ll find you have fewer lows \\u2013 all thanks to your connection.<\\/p><p>Here are 12 rules that will help deepen your relationship, according to couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Look after yourself\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to being in a relationship, we can often end up spending so much of our time and energy on the other person, that many of us lose sight of ourselves and take the back seat.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is especially the case if we do not have a strong enough sense of self,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cI\\u2019ve seen many people become preoccupied with their partner and their needs and neglect their own.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Sad!<\\/p><p>Abrahams said one of the best ways we can\\u00a0improve our relationship\\u00a0is by bringing our healthiest selves into the relationship and maintaining this \\u2013 so try to concentrate on developing yourself and who you are before focusing on someone else.<\\/p><p>Go on, you got this!<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to look after our mind, body, and spirit,\\u201d reminds Abrahams. \\u201cWhen we do this, we keep toxicity at bay so we can spend our time connecting and being intimate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Check your ego\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>That voice inside your head? That\\u2019s your ego. And it can do a lot of\\u00a0 things \\u00a0to a relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cOur ego holds our conscious and unconscious beliefs and expectations about relationships. Think of it as a relational template that we operate from,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo deepen our relationship with our partner, we need to remember that our relational template will be different from theirs.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there will always be a gap between our templates that we need to resolve \\u2013 and that\\u2019s okay.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat matters is how well we both navigate the gap. If we can discuss and work through difficulties, we will deepen the relationship. However, if the gap causes us fear and anxiety, then we may have a lot of conflicts instead.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Keep sexual intimacy on the agenda\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>You know how it gets. Life is busy. There\\u2019s work. Kids. Social engagements. Netflix. Sometimes it seems like relationships (and intimacy) get placed on the back burner, while we go about our business and focus on all the glorious stresses daily life has to offer.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have busy lives with many competing demands\\u00a0at any given moment. This is even more the case if we have children. We need to take care as\\u00a0sexual intimacy\\u00a0can decrease quickly in couple relationships,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s okay to be too tired to have sex at times,\\u00a0if we are too tired too often it can really harm the relationship. Without this, there\\u2019s a kind of\\u2026 gap.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt reveals that our relationship is at the bottom of our priority list. I believe this is a huge mistake. This breeds loneliness, shame about feeling undesirable, or shame about being a low- or\\u00a0no-sex couple.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSex is what\\u00a0makes the couple relationship different from other relationships, and without it, we can feel like flatmates or siblings. Sex is often a special glue that deepens our connection and holds a relationship together.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Keep emotional intimacy alive\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>And it\\u2019s not just sexual intimacy \\u2013 the same goes for\\u00a0emotional\\u00a0intimacy, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we take our eyes off emotional intimacy in our\\u00a0couple relationship, we open the door to disharmony and conflict,\\u201d said Abrahams, who said all humans need connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe are social animals, and connection with our partner helps us feel safe and secure in the world.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout the emotional connection, we no longer feel safe. We can feel lonely, depressed, or anxious that our relationship is in trouble or may even end. Emotional connection and intimacy is a crucial ingredient for a deeper relationship.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Focus and get in sync\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>How much time do you spend together after work? On the weekends? Be honest.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIn a world that continuously competes for our attention, we can find it difficult to pay attention and listen to our partner. We have work emails coming in, Netflix programs to watch, or our mobile notifying us every other second to pay attention,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When this happens, Abrahams said we may lose sight of our partner\\u2019s need to communicate with us.<\\/p><p>When you create a fulfilling routine with your partner, you\\u2019ll find you\\u2019re able to spend more quality time together and reconnect with one another.<\\/p><p>It could be as simple as going for a walk together after work, or waking up at the same time and making breakfast together in the morning.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey need us to focus, listen, and get in sync with them. This will deepen our relationship as we are showing them that\\u00a0we value, love, and respect them above everything else,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will feel a deeper connection with us too. The opposite damages relationships. When we don\\u2019t focus or pretend to listen, our partner can tell feel we\\u2019re not properly with them, and this often causes upset or anger.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Go to couples therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another way to deepen your connection with your partner is to get to know them through the help of a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be life-transforming as couples therapy allows you to understand why you both behave or think as you do, and where you are so different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTherapy also helps you both understand where these thoughts and behaviours came from. This experience will stay with you forever and have such a positive impact on you both for the years ahead.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. Honest communication\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Honesty is one of the biggest core values every couple needs in their relationship \\u2013 without it, things will kind of just fall apart.<\\/p><p>Opening up and being truthful with your partner about what you both want from the relationship, is key to establishing a strong foundation for trust and connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo have a deeper relationship with your partner it\\u2019s important to be honest with them about what\\u2019s important to you and the relationship,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe mindful that honesty can connect you both, however, the way you deliver your message may disconnect you. To deepen your relationship, connect respectfully and kindly as you share your viewpoint with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Look in the mirror\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>To be honest with someone and be able to deepen your relationship with your partner, it\\u2019s essential to know yourself and your intentions.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cHave an honest look in the mirror to see if you would want to have a partner like you. We all have areas we could pull up our socks.\\u201d<\\/p><p><em>Guilty!<\\/em><\\/p><p>\\u201cReflect on whether removing resentment, complaining, sulking or snapping at them would improve the relationship. Reflect on areas you could offer more support, be kinder, or do more to improve the functioning of the home.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17720,5141,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(17721,5141,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17722,5141,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17723,5142,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17724,5142,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17725,5142,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17726,5142,'_wp_page_template','default'),