(16832,5080,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: Getty\\u00a0<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16833,5080,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(16834,5080,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16835,5080,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16836,5080,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:25;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:25;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:25;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:9;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:12;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:11;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:11;s:11:\"header_size\";i:11;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:11;}}}}}'),(16837,5081,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(16838,5081,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(16839,5081,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(16840,5081,'_wp_page_template','default'),(16841,5081,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: Getty\\u00a0<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16842,5081,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(16843,5081,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16844,5081,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16845,5082,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(16846,5082,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(16847,5082,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(16848,5082,'_wp_page_template','default'),(16849,5082,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: Getty\\u00a0<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16850,5082,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(16851,5082,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16852,5082,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16853,5083,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(16854,5083,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(16855,5083,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(16856,5083,'_wp_page_template','default'),(16857,5083,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1745084162.jpg\",\"id\":5004,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"There Are 5 Types Of Narcissists. Here\\u2019s How To Spot Them\",\"description_text\":\"28 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>What do you think of when you think of a\\u00a0narcissist? Someone with a big ego? Someone totally in love with themselves? Someone who\\u2019s really controlling? Well, there\\u2019s a little more to it.<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because while\\u00a0narcissism\\u00a0is one of those words you\\u2019ll hear often enough (hey,\\u00a0MAFS), the traits and inherent behaviours that make up a narcissistic personality are actually pretty complex \\u2013 it\\u2019s a lot deeper and more layered than simple vanity.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, narcissism may not be as easy to spot as you might think.<\\/p><p>To find out more, we spoke to psychologist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0and asked her everything we need to know about narcissistic behaviours \\u2013 including the different characteristics and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is narcissism?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First\\u00a0of all, what exactly is narcissism? While we often hear the term floating around, is it more than just being incredibly self-centred? Is it really something that is essentially bad?<\\/p><p>Abrahams explains it like this: \\u201cNarcissism is a personality trait, where people are extremely self-focused, have an inflated sense of self, and have a huge need for praise and recognition. They lack awareness of how their behaviour and self-absorption impact others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can also disregard the rights and needs of others. Most of us have some periods where we are more self-preoccupied than others, however, for narcissists, their excessive self-involvement isn\\u2019t a fleeting state.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While there is\\u00a0research\\u00a0out there that has revealed benefits associated with high narcissism (apparently mental toughness is one of them), it\\u2019s obviously a personality trait that can also be deeply damaging to others, sometimes resulting in a serious impact on\\u00a0mental health.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to remember that narcissist traits can also be quite subtle \\u2013 you might not even recognise you\\u2019re dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>That\\u2019s why it\\u2019s important to look at some of the core differences of narcissism and how to spot them.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different types of narcissists?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep. There\\u2019s more than one type of narcissism. Experts say it\\u2019s best viewed on a spectrum to see where people sit. If you\\u2019re wondering how it works, the\\u00a0Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is the most commonly used measure of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s useful to think about narcissism as occurring along a spectrum from adaptive to maladaptive. Narcissism is adaptive and productive to our lives when we have high self-confidence and a high level of self-reliance,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHowever, at the other end, when it\\u2019s maladaptive, the traits will negatively impact you and others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Abrahams said these traits include being entitled and displaying behaviours of superiority, using people, and arrogance.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissistic personality disorder is well and truly at the malignant end of the spectrum,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>Below, we look at the five main kinds of narcissism and the common signs to look out for.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Overt or grandiose narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>An overt narcissist is more upfront with their methods of manipulation and generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t try to hide their ability to control others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be charming and enjoy the limelight on themselves. It can be easy to spot in others because being around them is somewhat\\u00a0uncomfortable\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0these are the people who regularly and shamelessly blow their own trumpet,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey want others to recognise and admire them and have an inflated sense of self, even overstating their achievements. They\\u2019re often entitled and feel superior.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Overt narcissists lack a sense of empathy, meaning they can be exploitative of others and their vulnerabilities, and excessively competitive, adds Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey lack the ability to reflect on how their excessive self-focus may be perceived by others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Covert or vulnerable narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Covert narcissists are a little different. They tend to be more insidious and subtle with the methods they use to get what they want.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism can be harder to detect than overt. They are still very self-focused but it\\u2019s quieter; more hidden in their introversion.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are regularly preoccupied and express their low self-worth, their vulnerability, and how insecure they are. They are more likely to struggle with depression, shame and anxiety. They can feel victim-like.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For example, while an overt narcissist might post a selfie on Instagram to assert how beautiful they are and remain the centre of everyone\\u2019s attention, a covert narcissist might post a selfie showing how sad or down they are, seeking emotional validation and pity from others.<\\/p><p>Interesting, right?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere\\u2019s still an absorption with themselves, about their deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness. They have often experienced childhood abuse\\/neglect,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be defensive when they\\u2019re not viewed as special because they\\u2019re preoccupied with this fear.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Antagonistic narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to antagonistic narcissists, these types of people always have an enemy and are often focused on \\u2018winning\\u2019.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis type of narcissism is focused on rivalry and competition. At its heart, there\\u2019s a \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mentality and a battle to win,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Think of the people who shout at other drivers, criticise shop attendants or waiters and are relatively unpleasant to be around. Sound familiar?<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey perpetually compete with others. They tend to\\u00a0argue and disagree with people, proving the \\u2018them versus me\\u2019 mindset. They can take advantage of people. They\\u2019re arrogant. It\\u2019s hard to connect with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Communal narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Communal narcissism is a specific type of narcissism that involves an individual seeking attention and praise from others by doing good deeds or acts of service for the community.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, \\u201cThis is seen in contrast to antagonistic narcissism, as people with communal narcissism receive a sense of self-importance and social power from being altruistic and fair to others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can see themselves as generous and caring yet their behaviour may reveal they are not as empathic as they believe\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0such as being easily morally outraged or having excessive\\u00a0reactions when they perceive unfairness. It\\u2019s not genuine concern for the welfare of others.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Malignant narcissism\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Welcome to the most exploitative type of narcissism: Malignant narcissism.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMalignant narcissism is the nastiest type as they lack empathy. Even though they have a high self-regard and an excessive need for recognition, they can also be cruel and sadistic, even deriving enjoyment from this,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Often considered sociopaths, malignant narcissists lack a conscience and are highly abusive, enjoying seeing others hurt and suffering.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can be aggressive and vindictive. They can worry excessively about others being a potential threat, even to the point of paranoia.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis has links with psychopathic and\\/or antisocial personality disorder. They are harmful to be in a relationship with and will exploit you sexually, physically, emotionally, or financially. Run! Run fast!\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How to spot a narcissist\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s important to know the signs of narcissism, or its extreme form of narcissistic personality disorder, so you know what you are up against,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When it comes to spotting a narcissist, Abrahams said there are a few core behaviours you need to look out for.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe signs below are all of someone with the disorder. Think of Donald Trump\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0he appears to tick all of\\u00a0these signs,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Look out for the below traits -<\\/p><ul><li>- An exaggerated sense of self-importance<\\/li><li>- A need for excessive admiration, praise, or perceived as superior (without the achievement)<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0A sense of entitlement \\u2013 expects compliance with their expectations<br \\/>-\\u00a0Inflating achievements and talents<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Preoccupation with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Elitism and concerned with \\u201cthe best\\u201d of everything<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Monopolise conversations, belittling and demeaning people they perceive as inferior<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Exploitative of others \\u2013 uses and misuses them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Lacks empathy<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Consumed with envy and believes others envy them<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0Arrogance, boastful and pretentious<\\/li><\\/ul><p>If any of these behaviours sound familiar, you might be dealing with a highly narcissistic individual.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNarcissists can\\u2019t tolerate criticism at all. They\\u2019re easily offended. They can be emotionally\\u00a0dysregulated, becoming angry, rageful, and impatient if they don\\u2019t get their way or receive special treatment. When criticised they\\u2019ll be defensive and even cruel.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Can narcissists be helped?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering how to help navigate a relationship with someone who is a narcissist \\u2013 know that it\\u2019s not exactly simple.<\\/p><p>Narcissists can be extremely problematic and damaging on multiple levels \\u2013 physically, emotionally and financially \\u2013 so cutting ties may often be the best solution.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPeople with this personality trait or narcissistic personality disorder rarely seek treatment. They see nothing wrong with how self-focused they are or how they exploit and use others,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey don\\u2019t come to therapy for help. In fact, the only time I see them in therapy is when their partner has dragged them in because they can\\u2019t stand the way they\\u2019ve been treated in the relationship. They don\\u2019t last long in the process\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0a session or two at most.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because they are seeking admiration and praise and can\\u2019t tolerate that they won\\u2019t be getting that in therapy. In fact, their partner may be displeased with them, or I may comment on their behaviour or way of operating which will always be perceived as a criticism. They never return.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019d like to learn more from Lissy, check out\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/how-our-ego-harms-couple-relationships\\/\\\"><strong>how our ego can harm our relationships<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p><p><em>Image source: Shutterstock (1745084162)<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16858,5083,'_thumbnail_id','5004'),(16859,5083,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16860,5083,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16862,5084,'custom_pagetitle','hide'),(16863,5084,'portfolio_content_padding','a:3:{s:11:\"padding-top\";s:1:\"0\";s:14:\"padding-bottom\";s:0:\"\";s:5:\"units\";s:2:\"px\";}'),(16864,5084,'case_study_gallery_lightbox','1'),(16865,5084,'case_study_gallery',''),(16866,5084,'wg_client',''),(16867,5084,'wg_construction_date',''),(16868,5084,'wg_location',''),(16869,5084,'wg_gardener',''),(16870,5084,'wg_completed_date',''),(16871,5084,'wg_price',''),(16872,5084,'wg_download_1',''),(16873,5084,'wg_download_2',''),(16874,5084,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(16875,5084,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(16876,5084,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(16877,5084,'_wp_page_template','default'),(16878,5084,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_1385860784-768x511-1.jpg\",\"id\":5003,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-340,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"4 Things To Do When You And Your Partner Have VERY Different Love Languages\",\"description_text\":\"4 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Quick one: How do you show love to your partner? Cuddles? Quality time? Compliments?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because as you might already know, according to\\u00a0The 5 Love Languages\\u00a0by marriage counsellor Gary Chapman, there are some very different principles of communicating love.<\\/p><p>This means how we express and receive love might be totally opposite to how our partner displays love to us, which can cause some\\u2026 difficulties.<\\/p><p>But just because you and your S.O. speak different\\u00a0love languages, it doesn\\u2019t mean everything is going to go to s**t. Nah. It just means you have to work a little harder in communicating what you both need from each other.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering where to start, we asked couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0for everything we need to know about coping with different love languages.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different love languages?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Woah! Hold up. Before we get into it, it\\u2019s probably worth giving you a quick rundown on what the different\\u00a0love languages\\u00a0actually are, right?<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cThese love language categories offer a helpful structure for capturing the differences in partner-to-partner caring gestures and loving behaviour.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us would fit into many categories, and some of us have one dominant category. They add a dimension to couple relationships that explain why some couples have a smoother or bumpier ride together.\\u201d<\\/p><p>But don\\u2019t worry, figuring out your partner\\u2019s love language is actually\\u00a0a lot\\u00a0easier than you might think. Seriously, it is! All you have to do is pay close attention to what they do and say, and you\\u2019ll be able to suss it out.<\\/p><p>Below are the five different love languages, and what they mean -<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Words of affirmation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First up? Spoken and written forms of affirmation. \\u201cWritten forms can be notes, texts, social media posts,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThese words allow them to feel appreciated, valued, desired, admired, loved or cared about. They never tire of receiving these messages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Quality time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This second category obviously relates to partners wishing to spend time together. \\u201cThis could be quality time on a date or even conversing where both partners have focussed attention and are present without distractions,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gifts\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cChapman calls these the \\u2018visual symbols of love,\'\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThe one offering the gift has had their partner in mind throughout the experience and made them a priority. Gifts can differ in size or monetary value.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Acts of service\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis category of love language is for people who like to show their love by helping their partner or by making life nicer for them\\u00a0in some way,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey take an action as a gesture of love. These acts are performed to acknowledge one\\u2019s partner and their value. People who do acts of service see themselves as a resource and are able to offer themselves up as part of the solution to problems or situations. They don\\u2019t need to be asked.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Physical touch\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In this category, Abrahams said partners feel love and connection through the physical and sexual realm and want this prioritised in the relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPhysical touch is a primitive response for animals with their offspring, and this can be comforting, protective and bonding. Many of us use this love language from childhood, adding the sexual dimension into our couple relationship,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What to do when you and your partner have different love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to be aware that it\\u2019s common to be with someone who speaks a different love language to you. You don\\u2019t need to speak the same language in order to have a successful relationship.<\\/p><p>It is important, however, to know the differences.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout understanding these differences, partners can easily become resentful, lonely, or frustrated. They can even destabilise the relationship,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the differences can feel as if one\\u2019s partner is not truly in the relationship. If we don\\u2019t register our partner\\u2019s love gestures or words of affirmation, then our ego may construct narratives of how unloving or uncaring they are.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cTragically, when these feelings take over, it can even lead to separation and divorce. This is why it\\u2019s important to acknowledge and register each other\\u2019s gestures of love.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you and your partner have different ways of showing love and affection and if it\\u2019s creating a rift of misunderstanding in your relationship, here are a few things that can help...\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Listen to your partner\\u2019s comments on the relationship\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\\u2019s normal for partners to have different love languages and express feelings differently, the key is to communicate openly with each other about what you need.<\\/p><p>Without this, they don\\u2019t know what you want from them and you don\\u2019t know what they need from you.<\\/p><p>So, how do you know if you\\u2019ve been missing important information they need you to know?<\\/p><p>Abrahams outlines the below signs -<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- \\u201cDo they tell you they feel lonely or bored in the relationship? They may miss having quality time with you and truly feeling connected,\\u201d she said,<br \\/>- \\u201cDo they comment about the lack of physical intimacy in the relationship or that it\\u2019s one-sided? Do they comment that physical intimacy has gone and is only there when you want sex?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to surprise them with gifts? Are they feeling you don\\u2019t think about them in your absence? Do you? If yes, how do you convey this to them?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to say the words, \\u2018I love you\\u2019 or \\u2018You look beautiful\\u2019? Do they want to hear how special they are or your positive feelings about them? Are you assuming they pick this up day-to-day?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDoes your partner feel resentful of making the effort and doing things for you? Are you missing their acts of service?\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Ask your partner about their love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Again, if you don\\u2019t understand how your partner shows love, you\\u2019re going to have a bad time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou may be missing many loving gestures as they are not on your radar,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cYou may also become dismissive or resentful of your partner if you don\\u2019t put these gestures into the equation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI\\u2019ve been guilty of this as my partner shows love through acts of service. On the weekend he brings me a cup of coffee in bed, which I love. He also does a huge grocery shop which I dislike doing.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s easy to take these for granted as they can become part of the normal chore distribution in a household, however, he started them to support and care for me.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Share your love languages with your partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThey need to become aware of your love languages, so they understand you better. It\\u2019s important they understand you and your gestures,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, many people like to cook a meal for their partner. This takes thought, effort, and time. It\\u2019s easy to overlook this gesture of love. Maybe they are not aware of yours.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f1c168d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2c14c52\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7937b54\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Be respectful of differences\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bfadae\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a07bf37\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d75100f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one\\u2019s important, you guys. While we can learn to communicate and compromise, you shouldn\\u2019t necessarily\\u00a0try to change a person\\u2019s love language.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNo one\\u2019s category of love language is right or wrong, just different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe respectful of their way and take care not to diminish their gestures as not relevant or not good enough for you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"82c8611\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cad8a53\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"72f5227\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why it\\u2019s important to support each other\\u2019s love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"1c817fc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"648e6e2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"87ab37f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When we don\\u2019t receive the love the way we want it, Abrahams said we can become dissatisfied or hurt and even controlling to get what we want.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are a few negative things that might happen if you choose to ignore each other\\u2019s love languages -\\u00a0<\\/p><ul><li style=\\\"list-style-type: none;\\\"><ul><li>- \\u201cFor partners with a dominant love language of words of affirmation, without these acknowledgments, they may feel unloved, unlovable, or lonely.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners who value quality time, they can easily feel slighted or distressed if their partner doesn\\u2019t support this. If their partner is easily distracted or unfocused, this can be experienced as not caring. They may conclude their partner may not want to be with them.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners have a love language of offering gifts to show love, without their partner being similar they may feel not thought about or not valued by their partner. This can be distressing.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners who value physical touch are left too untouched, they can feel lonely and undesired. This can be experienced as personal and hurtful.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners strong on acts of service they may appear selfish and unsupportive. This can harm the relationship.\\u201d<\\/li><\\/ul><\\/li><\\/ul><p>Importantly, Abrahams notes that a lot of how we communicate love stems from our past experiences and our childhood.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSo, it\\u2019s important to remember that it\\u2019s not our partner\\u2019s job to \\u2018fix\\u2019 our need for cuddles or how we feel loved up by receiving gifts,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere is also no way they will meet all of\\u00a0these needs and we need to be careful not to blame them when they can\\u2019t or don\\u2019t meet them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you sense you have childhood needs that still hurt you then it\\u2019s important to heal those, potentially through therapy, podcasts, or books. This means your relationship won\\u2019t be burdened by these unmet needs of the past being imposed in the present.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16879,5084,'case_study_content_padding','a:3:{s:5:\"units\";s:2:\"px\";s:11:\"padding-top\";s:1:\"0\";s:14:\"padding-bottom\";s:4:\"95px\";}'),(16880,5084,'_oembed_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','<iframe title=\"Video Placeholder\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/XHOmBV4js_E?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen></iframe>'),(16881,5084,'_oembed_time_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','1587374837'),(16882,5084,'_wp_old_slug','find-yourself-of-julia'),(16883,5084,'_thumbnail_id','5003'),(16884,5084,'case_customer','David Luis'),(16885,5084,'case_signs','Unstable psychology serious'),(16886,5084,'case_result','100% Psychological stability'),(16887,5084,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16888,5084,'_edit_lock','1665973039:3'),(16889,5084,'_edit_last','3'),(16890,5084,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16891,5084,'_wp_old_slug','mamamia'),(16893,5084,'_wp_old_date','2022-07-24'),(16926,5085,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(16927,5085,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(16928,5085,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(16929,5085,'_wp_page_template','default');
INSERT INTO `wpjr_postmeta` VALUES (16930,5085,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/Avoidance.png\",\"id\":5027,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-232,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"From numbness to avoidance: 5 signs you\'re \'emotionally coasting\' right now\",\"description_text\":\"1 July 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In a\\u00a0Better Homes and Gardens\\u00a0interview,\\u00a0Harry Styles\\u00a0said he had the tendency to \\u201cemotionally coast\\u201d through life - where he described feeling detached, numb and overwhelmed by his feelings and life experiences.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And, honestly, it might just be the best way to describe the collective emotion of 2022.<\\/p><p>Because while everything is \'back\' (travel! Holidays! Festivals! Weddings!), there\'s also the very real and very obvious feeling of mental exhaustion when it comes to the relentless\\u00a0bad news cycle\\u00a0(see: war, protests, shootings) raging right before our eyes.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you\'re anything like us, you might be feeling like it\'s becoming harder and harder to know where to place your energy and care. To actually\\u00a0feel\\u00a0things.<\\/p><p>Enter: \'Emotional coasting\'.<\\/p><p>Watch: Signs that mean you should seek help for your mental health.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Styles told\\u00a0BHG\\u00a0that therapy allowed him to open up, better connect with his emotions and experiences, and live more authentically.<\\/p><p>He said, \\\"I think that accepting living, being happy, hurting in the extremes, that is the most alive you can be. Losing it crying, losing it laughing - there\'s no way, I don\'t think, to feel more alive than that.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, what exactly is emotional coasting and why do we do it? And more importantly,\\u00a0how do we stop?<\\/p><p>Here, we ask an expert in psychology to tell us\\u00a0everything we need to know.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is \'emotional coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Emotional coasting is a term that encompasses what I call the \\u201cbland band\\u201d, where consciously and\\/or unconsciously we strip our lives of the wider emotional spectrum,\\\" explains psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"This means experiences might be felt as \'nice\' or \'a bit tough\' but never really \'incredible\' or \'heartbreaking\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>The reason behind this? According to Abrahams, it\'s almost like a defence mechanism when we know we\'re not going to be able to\\u00a0process difficult feelings or experiences.<\\/p><p>\\\"We do this because we haven\\u2019t developed a sufficient distress tolerance to sit with feelings outside of the \'bland band\',\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"So, emotional coasting is used to rein in emotional experiences, so we feel safer. If we haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate more extreme emotions, like joy and excitement or distress and fear, then we typically look for ways to dampen them.\\\"<\\/p><p>In effect, this helps protect us from being overwhelmed or dealing with certain emotions we\'re not prepared to take on.<\\/p><p>\\\"The problem is that the way we dampen them is by either clipping our internal state (living in the emotional bland\\u00a0band) or by using something in the external world as a crutch (like drugs or alcohol, spending money, over-eating, or restricting food, or by using ego defence mechanisms like denial or compartmentalisation).\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some common signs you might be \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Does all this sound a little... familiar? Don\'t worry. You\'re not alone.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>As Abrahams tells us, it\'s something we\'ll all go through at some point\\u00a0in our lives - especially after the past few years.<\\/p><p>\\\"It\\u2019s impossible to feel every feeling to the full extent. Imagine needing to focus on your work following a fight with your partner and not having any tools up your sleeve to do so. We\\u2019d end up plagued by every single feeling and achieve nothing for months on end!\\\"<\\/p><p>If you\'re unable to maintain your usual drive and care for life and all its experiences, Abrahams said there are four important questions you need to ask yourself.<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I really let myself become excited? What language do I use around this?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I move away from people when they are ecstatic or joyous?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I minimise or compartmentalise my feelings to move away from the sadness?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I look outside of myself for the answer? Is this to numb the pain? Is it to distract from the pain?<\\/p><p>Okay. How many of these did you say \'yes\' to?<\\/p><p>\\\"As a therapist, I know we can\\u2019t just keep stuffing feelings down and, at some point, symptoms will erupt either mentally or physically,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Meaning? You need to be aware of the key signs and symptoms, so you\'re able to stop it from affecting your life negatively.<\\/p><p>Some common signs of emotional coasting include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Being busy\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you using work as a distraction? \\\"Whilst being busy can help at times,\\u00a0we need to be careful we are not over-using busyness to bypass feelings,\\\" said Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Sublimation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>See: Avoiding any form of emotional processing by doing absolutely anything else.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"This is where we avoid the full emotional experience by attending to pursuits that are deemed worthwhile, such as mowing the lawn, working later, or using the gym,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Compartmentalising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, it\'s common for many people to\\u00a0unconsciously avoid the emotional impact by putting it deep down in our emotional vault and pretty much just throwing away the key. \\\"This helps us feel we are no longer in contact with it - despite the fact it still resides in us,\\\" she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Minimising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"We can downplay our emotions. For example, when we have been unexpectedly broken up with, we may minimise by stating, \'He didn\\u2019t mean that much to me anyway\' or \'I\\u2019m overthinking this - it\\u2019s simple - it\\u2019s over\'.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Blocking or numbing\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Instead of using coping strategies, many people will turn to other things to replace this feeling, using it as a crutch to avoid acknowledging or processing their feelings.<\\/p><p>This involves \\\"using any action outside of ourselves to block or numb the pain,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"This could be through drugs or alcohol, self-harm, gambling...\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How can you stop yourself from \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"It\\u2019s critical for all of us who emotionally coast to increase our window of tolerance for emotions outside of the \'bland band\'. Life will throw us curve balls, and always when we least expect it.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being aware of this behavior and identifying the reasons behind it (that is, what you\'re trying to protect yourself from by numbing your emotions) and how it impacts your life, can help you move forward and better process your emotions and life experiences going forward.<\\/p><p>But just remember - learning to stop \'emotional coasting\' is not a quick fix, and it can take some time in order to avoid getting overwhelmed with emotions.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, to prevent emotional coasting, it\'s important to develop three things:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Language awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It seems like a small change, but Abrahams said that becoming aware of whether your language minimises your emotional experiences is more important than you might think.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Do you say the meal is \'satisfying\' when you may mean \'delicious\'? Allow yourself freedom to turn the volume up. Do you say \'a bit disappointing\' when your pet has died or are you allowed to be \'grief-filled\'?\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"From numbness to avoidance: 5 signs you\'re \'emotionally coasting\' right now\",\"description_text\":\"1 July 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In a\\u00a0Better Homes and Gardens\\u00a0interview,\\u00a0Harry Styles\\u00a0said he had the tendency to \\u201cemotionally coast\\u201d through life - where he described feeling detached, numb and overwhelmed by his feelings and life experiences.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And, honestly, it might just be the best way to describe the collective emotion of 2022.<\\/p><p>Because while everything is \'back\' (travel! Holidays! Festivals! Weddings!), there\'s also the very real and very obvious feeling of mental exhaustion when it comes to the relentless\\u00a0bad news cycle\\u00a0(see: war, protests, shootings) raging right before our eyes.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you\'re anything like us, you might be feeling like it\'s becoming harder and harder to know where to place your energy and care. To actually\\u00a0feel\\u00a0things.<\\/p><p>Enter: \'Emotional coasting\'.<\\/p><p>Watch: Signs that mean you should seek help for your mental health.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Styles told\\u00a0BHG\\u00a0that therapy allowed him to open up, better connect with his emotions and experiences, and live more authentically.<\\/p><p>He said, \\\"I think that accepting living, being happy, hurting in the extremes, that is the most alive you can be. Losing it crying, losing it laughing - there\'s no way, I don\'t think, to feel more alive than that.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, what exactly is emotional coasting and why do we do it? And more importantly,\\u00a0how do we stop?<\\/p><p>Here, we ask an expert in psychology to tell us\\u00a0everything we need to know.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is \'emotional coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Emotional coasting is a term that encompasses what I call the \\u201cbland band\\u201d, where consciously and\\/or unconsciously we strip our lives of the wider emotional spectrum,\\\" explains psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"This means experiences might be felt as \'nice\' or \'a bit tough\' but never really \'incredible\' or \'heartbreaking\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>The reason behind this? According to Abrahams, it\'s almost like a defence mechanism when we know we\'re not going to be able to\\u00a0process difficult feelings or experiences.<\\/p><p>\\\"We do this because we haven\\u2019t developed a sufficient distress tolerance to sit with feelings outside of the \'bland band\',\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"So, emotional coasting is used to rein in emotional experiences, so we feel safer. If we haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate more extreme emotions, like joy and excitement or distress and fear, then we typically look for ways to dampen them.\\\"<\\/p><p>In effect, this helps protect us from being overwhelmed or dealing with certain emotions we\'re not prepared to take on.<\\/p><p>\\\"The problem is that the way we dampen them is by either clipping our internal state (living in the emotional bland\\u00a0band) or by using something in the external world as a crutch (like drugs or alcohol, spending money, over-eating, or restricting food, or by using ego defence mechanisms like denial or compartmentalisation).\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some common signs you might be \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Does all this sound a little... familiar? Don\'t worry. You\'re not alone.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>As Abrahams tells us, it\'s something we\'ll all go through at some point\\u00a0in our lives - especially after the past few years.<\\/p><p>\\\"It\\u2019s impossible to feel every feeling to the full extent. Imagine needing to focus on your work following a fight with your partner and not having any tools up your sleeve to do so. We\\u2019d end up plagued by every single feeling and achieve nothing for months on end!\\\"<\\/p><p>If you\'re unable to maintain your usual drive and care for life and all its experiences, Abrahams said there are four important questions you need to ask yourself.<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I really let myself become excited? What language do I use around this?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I move away from people when they are ecstatic or joyous?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I minimise or compartmentalise my feelings to move away from the sadness?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I look outside of myself for the answer? Is this to numb the pain? Is it to distract from the pain?<\\/p><p>Okay. How many of these did you say \'yes\' to?<\\/p><p>\\\"As a therapist, I know we can\\u2019t just keep stuffing feelings down and, at some point, symptoms will erupt either mentally or physically,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Meaning? You need to be aware of the key signs and symptoms, so you\'re able to stop it from affecting your life negatively.<\\/p><p>Some common signs of emotional coasting include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Being busy\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you using work as a distraction? \\\"Whilst being busy can help at times,\\u00a0we need to be careful we are not over-using busyness to bypass feelings,\\\" said Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Sublimation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>See: Avoiding any form of emotional processing by doing absolutely anything else.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"This is where we avoid the full emotional experience by attending to pursuits that are deemed worthwhile, such as mowing the lawn, working later, or using the gym,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Compartmentalising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, it\'s common for many people to\\u00a0unconsciously avoid the emotional impact by putting it deep down in our emotional vault and pretty much just throwing away the key. \\\"This helps us feel we are no longer in contact with it - despite the fact it still resides in us,\\\" she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Minimising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"We can downplay our emotions. For example, when we have been unexpectedly broken up with, we may minimise by stating, \'He didn\\u2019t mean that much to me anyway\' or \'I\\u2019m overthinking this - it\\u2019s simple - it\\u2019s over\'.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Blocking or numbing\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Instead of using coping strategies, many people will turn to other things to replace this feeling, using it as a crutch to avoid acknowledging or processing their feelings.<\\/p><p>This involves \\\"using any action outside of ourselves to block or numb the pain,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"This could be through drugs or alcohol, self-harm, gambling...\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How can you stop yourself from \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"It\\u2019s critical for all of us who emotionally coast to increase our window of tolerance for emotions outside of the \'bland band\'. Life will throw us curve balls, and always when we least expect it.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being aware of this behavior and identifying the reasons behind it (that is, what you\'re trying to protect yourself from by numbing your emotions) and how it impacts your life, can help you move forward and better process your emotions and life experiences going forward.<\\/p><p>But just remember - learning to stop \'emotional coasting\' is not a quick fix, and it can take some time in order to avoid getting overwhelmed with emotions.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, to prevent emotional coasting, it\'s important to develop three things:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Language awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It seems like a small change, but Abrahams said that becoming aware of whether your language minimises your emotional experiences is more important than you might think.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Do you say the meal is \'satisfying\' when you may mean \'delicious\'? Allow yourself freedom to turn the volume up. Do you say \'a bit disappointing\' when your pet has died or are you allowed to be \'grief-filled\'?\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"From numbness to avoidance: 5 signs you\'re \'emotionally coasting\' right now\",\"description_text\":\"1 July 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In a\\u00a0Better Homes and Gardens\\u00a0interview,\\u00a0Harry Styles\\u00a0said he had the tendency to \\u201cemotionally coast\\u201d through life - where he described feeling detached, numb and overwhelmed by his feelings and life experiences.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>And, honestly, it might just be the best way to describe the collective emotion of 2022.<\\/p><p>Because while everything is \'back\' (travel! Holidays! Festivals! Weddings!), there\'s also the very real and very obvious feeling of mental exhaustion when it comes to the relentless\\u00a0bad news cycle\\u00a0(see: war, protests, shootings) raging right before our eyes.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you\'re anything like us, you might be feeling like it\'s becoming harder and harder to know where to place your energy and care. To actually\\u00a0feel\\u00a0things.<\\/p><p>Enter: \'Emotional coasting\'.<\\/p><p>Watch: Signs that mean you should seek help for your mental health.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Styles told\\u00a0BHG\\u00a0that therapy allowed him to open up, better connect with his emotions and experiences, and live more authentically.<\\/p><p>He said, \\\"I think that accepting living, being happy, hurting in the extremes, that is the most alive you can be. Losing it crying, losing it laughing - there\'s no way, I don\'t think, to feel more alive than that.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, what exactly is emotional coasting and why do we do it? And more importantly,\\u00a0how do we stop?<\\/p><p>Here, we ask an expert in psychology to tell us\\u00a0everything we need to know.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is \'emotional coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Emotional coasting is a term that encompasses what I call the \\u201cbland band\\u201d, where consciously and\\/or unconsciously we strip our lives of the wider emotional spectrum,\\\" explains psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"This means experiences might be felt as \'nice\' or \'a bit tough\' but never really \'incredible\' or \'heartbreaking\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>The reason behind this? According to Abrahams, it\'s almost like a defence mechanism when we know we\'re not going to be able to\\u00a0process difficult feelings or experiences.<\\/p><p>\\\"We do this because we haven\\u2019t developed a sufficient distress tolerance to sit with feelings outside of the \'bland band\',\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"So, emotional coasting is used to rein in emotional experiences, so we feel safer. If we haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate more extreme emotions, like joy and excitement or distress and fear, then we typically look for ways to dampen them.\\\"<\\/p><p>In effect, this helps protect us from being overwhelmed or dealing with certain emotions we\'re not prepared to take on.<\\/p><p>\\\"The problem is that the way we dampen them is by either clipping our internal state (living in the emotional bland\\u00a0band) or by using something in the external world as a crutch (like drugs or alcohol, spending money, over-eating, or restricting food, or by using ego defence mechanisms like denial or compartmentalisation).\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are some common signs you might be \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Does all this sound a little... familiar? Don\'t worry. You\'re not alone.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>As Abrahams tells us, it\'s something we\'ll all go through at some point\\u00a0in our lives - especially after the past few years.<\\/p><p>\\\"It\\u2019s impossible to feel every feeling to the full extent. Imagine needing to focus on your work following a fight with your partner and not having any tools up your sleeve to do so. We\\u2019d end up plagued by every single feeling and achieve nothing for months on end!\\\"<\\/p><p>If you\'re unable to maintain your usual drive and care for life and all its experiences, Abrahams said there are four important questions you need to ask yourself.<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I really let myself become excited? What language do I use around this?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- Do I move away from people when they are ecstatic or joyous?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I minimise or compartmentalise my feelings to move away from the sadness?<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- When I\\u2019m sad, do I look outside of myself for the answer? Is this to numb the pain? Is it to distract from the pain?<\\/p><p>Okay. How many of these did you say \'yes\' to?<\\/p><p>\\\"As a therapist, I know we can\\u2019t just keep stuffing feelings down and, at some point, symptoms will erupt either mentally or physically,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Meaning? You need to be aware of the key signs and symptoms, so you\'re able to stop it from affecting your life negatively.<\\/p><p>Some common signs of emotional coasting include -\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Being busy\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Are you using work as a distraction? \\\"Whilst being busy can help at times,\\u00a0we need to be careful we are not over-using busyness to bypass feelings,\\\" said Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Sublimation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>See: Avoiding any form of emotional processing by doing absolutely anything else.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"This is where we avoid the full emotional experience by attending to pursuits that are deemed worthwhile, such as mowing the lawn, working later, or using the gym,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Compartmentalising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, it\'s common for many people to\\u00a0unconsciously avoid the emotional impact by putting it deep down in our emotional vault and pretty much just throwing away the key. \\\"This helps us feel we are no longer in contact with it - despite the fact it still resides in us,\\\" she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Minimising\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"We can downplay our emotions. For example, when we have been unexpectedly broken up with, we may minimise by stating, \'He didn\\u2019t mean that much to me anyway\' or \'I\\u2019m overthinking this - it\\u2019s simple - it\\u2019s over\'.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e6bed53\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16dbca4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"15b573c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Blocking or numbing\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b738f57\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"be08062\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3840ca6\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Instead of using coping strategies, many people will turn to other things to replace this feeling, using it as a crutch to avoid acknowledging or processing their feelings.<\\/p><p>This involves \\\"using any action outside of ourselves to block or numb the pain,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"This could be through drugs or alcohol, self-harm, gambling...\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How can you stop yourself from \'emotionally coasting\'?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"It\\u2019s critical for all of us who emotionally coast to increase our window of tolerance for emotions outside of the \'bland band\'. Life will throw us curve balls, and always when we least expect it.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being aware of this behavior and identifying the reasons behind it (that is, what you\'re trying to protect yourself from by numbing your emotions) and how it impacts your life, can help you move forward and better process your emotions and life experiences going forward.<\\/p><p>But just remember - learning to stop \'emotional coasting\' is not a quick fix, and it can take some time in order to avoid getting overwhelmed with emotions.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, to prevent emotional coasting, it\'s important to develop three things:<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Language awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>It seems like a small change, but Abrahams said that becoming aware of whether your language minimises your emotional experiences is more important than you might think.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Do you say the meal is \'satisfying\' when you may mean \'delicious\'? Allow yourself freedom to turn the volume up. Do you say \'a bit disappointing\' when your pet has died or are you allowed to be \'grief-filled\'?\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Body awareness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"Our body often provides the truth about how we are feeling\\u00a0- without the story in our mind,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>Read: Listen to your body.<\\/p><p>\\\"Focus on your heart - is it beating more rapidly suddenly? Why? Information and sensations arise constantly from our body, and this can reveal that we\\u2019re not actually emotionally coasting.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"For example, our body will reveal if we are fearful, excited, or disappointed - it won\\u2019t coast. We can\\u2019t trick our body out of its experience, so tune in to enhance the colour of your emotional life.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Develop distress tolerance. \",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\\"It\\u2019s critical for our mental and physical health to be able to\\u00a0sit with the highs and lows of life without needing to do something with them. Many of us need to increase our ability to tolerate distress.\\\"<\\/p><p>Going to therapy and seeking help from a professional is a great way to \\\"increase your emotional range and truly understanding why you became someone who emotionally coasts\\u00a0in the first place.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This, alongside mindfulness techniques, can help you develop a greater ability to tolerate a greater range of emotions that will erupt through life\\u2019s curveballs.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on <a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\"><strong>what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"4 Things To Do When You And Your Partner Have VERY Different Love Languages\",\"description_text\":\"4 February 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Quick one: How do you show love to your partner? Cuddles? Quality time? Compliments?<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Because as you might already know, according to\\u00a0The 5 Love Languages\\u00a0by marriage counsellor Gary Chapman, there are some very different principles of communicating love.<\\/p><p>This means how we express and receive love might be totally opposite to how our partner displays love to us, which can cause some\\u2026 difficulties.<\\/p><p>But just because you and your S.O. speak different\\u00a0love languages, it doesn\\u2019t mean everything is going to go to s**t. Nah. It just means you have to work a little harder in communicating what you both need from each other.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re wondering where to start, we asked couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0for everything we need to know about coping with different love languages.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the different love languages?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Woah! Hold up. Before we get into it, it\\u2019s probably worth giving you a quick rundown on what the different\\u00a0love languages\\u00a0actually are, right?<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cThese love language categories offer a helpful structure for capturing the differences in partner-to-partner caring gestures and loving behaviour.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us would fit into many categories, and some of us have one dominant category. They add a dimension to couple relationships that explain why some couples have a smoother or bumpier ride together.\\u201d<\\/p><p>But don\\u2019t worry, figuring out your partner\\u2019s love language is actually\\u00a0a lot\\u00a0easier than you might think. Seriously, it is! All you have to do is pay close attention to what they do and say, and you\\u2019ll be able to suss it out.<\\/p><p>Below are the five different love languages, and what they mean -<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Words of affirmation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"57ad8b5\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2ff06d0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9c7f9fc\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First up? Spoken and written forms of affirmation. \\u201cWritten forms can be notes, texts, social media posts,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThese words allow them to feel appreciated, valued, desired, admired, loved or cared about. They never tire of receiving these messages.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Quality time\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"071e448\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"163f4cc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3270964\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This second category obviously relates to partners wishing to spend time together. \\u201cThis could be quality time on a date or even conversing where both partners have focussed attention and are present without distractions,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Gifts\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cChapman calls these the \\u2018visual symbols of love,\'\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cThe one offering the gift has had their partner in mind throughout the experience and made them a priority. Gifts can differ in size or monetary value.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f4cf7bf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c83c9ac\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe39c58\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Acts of service\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"06cc6c9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e7977f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d0b8846\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThis category of love language is for people who like to show their love by helping their partner or by making life nicer for them\\u00a0in some way,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey take an action as a gesture of love. These acts are performed to acknowledge one\\u2019s partner and their value. People who do acts of service see themselves as a resource and are able to offer themselves up as part of the solution to problems or situations. They don\\u2019t need to be asked.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bb99771\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"48dbaad\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1e5a7bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Physical touch\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6f04b2e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"bfdd52a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2fc62bf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>In this category, Abrahams said partners feel love and connection through the physical and sexual realm and want this prioritised in the relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cPhysical touch is a primitive response for animals with their offspring, and this can be comforting, protective and bonding. Many of us use this love language from childhood, adding the sexual dimension into our couple relationship,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"bdc5e28\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6b183a9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"574f290\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What to do when you and your partner have different love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"b134af8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"713418c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"240539c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>First off, you need to be aware that it\\u2019s common to be with someone who speaks a different love language to you. You don\\u2019t need to speak the same language in order to have a successful relationship.<\\/p><p>It is important, however, to know the differences.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout understanding these differences, partners can easily become resentful, lonely, or frustrated. They can even destabilise the relationship,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSometimes the differences can feel as if one\\u2019s partner is not truly in the relationship. If we don\\u2019t register our partner\\u2019s love gestures or words of affirmation, then our ego may construct narratives of how unloving or uncaring they are.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cTragically, when these feelings take over, it can even lead to separation and divorce. This is why it\\u2019s important to acknowledge and register each other\\u2019s gestures of love.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you and your partner have different ways of showing love and affection and if it\\u2019s creating a rift of misunderstanding in your relationship, here are a few things that can help...\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"efb7225\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f3ed7ca\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"134d281\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Listen to your partner\\u2019s comments on the relationship\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dbf06c8\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"db0ce1a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fe5949f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\\u2019s normal for partners to have different love languages and express feelings differently, the key is to communicate openly with each other about what you need.<\\/p><p>Without this, they don\\u2019t know what you want from them and you don\\u2019t know what they need from you.<\\/p><p>So, how do you know if you\\u2019ve been missing important information they need you to know?<\\/p><p>Abrahams outlines the below signs -<\\/p><p style=\\\"padding-left: 40px;\\\">- \\u201cDo they tell you they feel lonely or bored in the relationship? They may miss having quality time with you and truly feeling connected,\\u201d she said,<br \\/>- \\u201cDo they comment about the lack of physical intimacy in the relationship or that it\\u2019s one-sided? Do they comment that physical intimacy has gone and is only there when you want sex?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to surprise them with gifts? Are they feeling you don\\u2019t think about them in your absence? Do you? If yes, how do you convey this to them?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDo they want you to say the words, \\u2018I love you\\u2019 or \\u2018You look beautiful\\u2019? Do they want to hear how special they are or your positive feelings about them? Are you assuming they pick this up day-to-day?\\u201d<br \\/>-\\u00a0\\u201cDoes your partner feel resentful of making the effort and doing things for you? Are you missing their acts of service?\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"8b49b19\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9668db1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"33ad9e5\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Ask your partner about their love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"d4c30ec\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8cc6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"50246c9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Again, if you don\\u2019t understand how your partner shows love, you\\u2019re going to have a bad time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou may be missing many loving gestures as they are not on your radar,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cYou may also become dismissive or resentful of your partner if you don\\u2019t put these gestures into the equation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI\\u2019ve been guilty of this as my partner shows love through acts of service. On the weekend he brings me a cup of coffee in bed, which I love. He also does a huge grocery shop which I dislike doing.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt\\u2019s easy to take these for granted as they can become part of the normal chore distribution in a household, however, he started them to support and care for me.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9621447\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"443dfbb\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9d61429\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Share your love languages with your partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"681318f\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d44932a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c12970f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cThey need to become aware of your love languages, so they understand you better. It\\u2019s important they understand you and your gestures,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor example, many people like to cook a meal for their partner. This takes thought, effort, and time. It\\u2019s easy to overlook this gesture of love. Maybe they are not aware of yours.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f1c168d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2c14c52\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7937b54\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Be respectful of differences\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0bfadae\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a07bf37\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d75100f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>This one\\u2019s important, you guys. While we can learn to communicate and compromise, you shouldn\\u2019t necessarily\\u00a0try to change a person\\u2019s love language.<\\/p><p>\\u201cNo one\\u2019s category of love language is right or wrong, just different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe respectful of their way and take care not to diminish their gestures as not relevant or not good enough for you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"82c8611\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cad8a53\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"72f5227\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why it\\u2019s important to support each other\\u2019s love languages\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"1c817fc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"648e6e2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"87ab37f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When we don\\u2019t receive the love the way we want it, Abrahams said we can become dissatisfied or hurt and even controlling to get what we want.<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there are a few negative things that might happen if you choose to ignore each other\\u2019s love languages -\\u00a0<\\/p><ul><li style=\\\"list-style-type: none;\\\"><ul><li>- \\u201cFor partners with a dominant love language of words of affirmation, without these acknowledgments, they may feel unloved, unlovable, or lonely.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners who value quality time, they can easily feel slighted or distressed if their partner doesn\\u2019t support this. If their partner is easily distracted or unfocused, this can be experienced as not caring. They may conclude their partner may not want to be with them.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners have a love language of offering gifts to show love, without their partner being similar they may feel not thought about or not valued by their partner. This can be distressing.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cIf partners who value physical touch are left too untouched, they can feel lonely and undesired. This can be experienced as personal and hurtful.\\u201d<\\/li><li>-\\u00a0\\u201cFor partners strong on acts of service they may appear selfish and unsupportive. This can harm the relationship.\\u201d<\\/li><\\/ul><\\/li><\\/ul><p>Importantly, Abrahams notes that a lot of how we communicate love stems from our past experiences and our childhood.<\\/p><p>\\u201cSo, it\\u2019s important to remember that it\\u2019s not our partner\\u2019s job to \\u2018fix\\u2019 our need for cuddles or how we feel loved up by receiving gifts,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere is also no way they will meet all of\\u00a0these needs and we need to be careful not to blame them when they can\\u2019t or don\\u2019t meet them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIf you sense you have childhood needs that still hurt you then it\\u2019s important to heal those, potentially through therapy, podcasts, or books. This means your relationship won\\u2019t be burdened by these unmet needs of the past being imposed in the 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":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"12 rules that will help deepen your relationship\",\"description_text\":\"19 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Beyond the cute Instagram posts and meme tagging, relationships can be fickle AF. Because even if you\\u2019re head over heels for someone, there\\u2019s still going to be those s**tty moments of uncertainty, frustration, and confusion.<\\/p><p>But working on having a deeper relationship with your partner and ensuring you have a strong connection will ultimately mean that during these kinds of moments, you\\u2019ll be able to work through it together.<\\/p><p>As with most relationship things, it all starts with the one key need:\\u00a0communication.<\\/p><p>While it takes time and effort, the good news is that it doesn\\u2019t have to be difficult. And over time, you\\u2019ll find you have fewer lows \\u2013 all thanks to your connection.<\\/p><p>Here are 12 rules that will help deepen your relationship, according to couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Look after yourself\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to being in a relationship, we can often end up spending so much of our time and energy on the other person, that many of us lose sight of ourselves and take the back seat.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is especially the case if we do not have a strong enough sense of self,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cI\\u2019ve seen many people become preoccupied with their partner and their needs and neglect their own.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Sad!<\\/p><p>Abrahams said one of the best ways we can\\u00a0improve our relationship\\u00a0is by bringing our healthiest selves into the relationship and maintaining this \\u2013 so try to concentrate on developing yourself and who you are before focusing on someone else.<\\/p><p>Go on, you got this!<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to look after our mind, body, and spirit,\\u201d reminds Abrahams. \\u201cWhen we do this, we keep toxicity at bay so we can spend our time connecting and being intimate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Check your ego\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>That voice inside your head? That\\u2019s your ego. And it can do a lot of\\u00a0 things \\u00a0to a relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cOur ego holds our conscious and unconscious beliefs and expectations about relationships. Think of it as a relational template that we operate from,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo deepen our relationship with our partner, we need to remember that our relational template will be different from theirs.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there will always be a gap between our templates that we need to resolve \\u2013 and that\\u2019s okay.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat matters is how well we both navigate the gap. If we can discuss and work through difficulties, we will deepen the relationship. However, if the gap causes us fear and anxiety, then we may have a lot of conflicts instead.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Keep sexual intimacy on the agenda\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>You know how it gets. Life is busy. There\\u2019s work. Kids. Social engagements. Netflix. Sometimes it seems like relationships (and intimacy) get placed on the back burner, while we go about our business and focus on all the glorious stresses daily life has to offer.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have busy lives with many competing demands\\u00a0at any given moment. This is even more the case if we have children. We need to take care as\\u00a0sexual intimacy\\u00a0can decrease quickly in couple relationships,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s okay to be too tired to have sex at times,\\u00a0if we are too tired too often it can really harm the relationship. Without this, there\\u2019s a kind of\\u2026 gap.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt reveals that our relationship is at the bottom of our priority list. I believe this is a huge mistake. This breeds loneliness, shame about feeling undesirable, or shame about being a low- or\\u00a0no-sex couple.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSex is what\\u00a0makes the couple relationship different from other relationships, and without it, we can feel like flatmates or siblings. Sex is often a special glue that deepens our connection and holds a relationship together.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Keep emotional intimacy alive\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>And it\\u2019s not just sexual intimacy \\u2013 the same goes for\\u00a0emotional\\u00a0intimacy, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we take our eyes off emotional intimacy in our\\u00a0couple relationship, we open the door to disharmony and conflict,\\u201d said Abrahams, who said all humans need connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe are social animals, and connection with our partner helps us feel safe and secure in the world.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout the emotional connection, we no longer feel safe. We can feel lonely, depressed, or anxious that our relationship is in trouble or may even end. Emotional connection and intimacy is a crucial ingredient for a deeper relationship.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Focus and get in sync\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>How much time do you spend together after work? On the weekends? Be honest.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIn a world that continuously competes for our attention, we can find it difficult to pay attention and listen to our partner. We have work emails coming in, Netflix programs to watch, or our mobile notifying us every other second to pay attention,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When this happens, Abrahams said we may lose sight of our partner\\u2019s need to communicate with us.<\\/p><p>When you create a fulfilling routine with your partner, you\\u2019ll find you\\u2019re able to spend more quality time together and reconnect with one another.<\\/p><p>It could be as simple as going for a walk together after work, or waking up at the same time and making breakfast together in the morning.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey need us to focus, listen, and get in sync with them. This will deepen our relationship as we are showing them that\\u00a0we value, love, and respect them above everything else,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will feel a deeper connection with us too. The opposite damages relationships. When we don\\u2019t focus or pretend to listen, our partner can tell feel we\\u2019re not properly with them, and this often causes upset or anger.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Go to couples therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another way to deepen your connection with your partner is to get to know them through the help of a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be life-transforming as couples therapy allows you to understand why you both behave or think as you do, and where you are so different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTherapy also helps you both understand where these thoughts and behaviours came from. This experience will stay with you forever and have such a positive impact on you both for the years ahead.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. Honest communication\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Honesty is one of the biggest core values every couple needs in their relationship \\u2013 without it, things will kind of just fall apart.<\\/p><p>Opening up and being truthful with your partner about what you both want from the relationship, is key to establishing a strong foundation for trust and connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo have a deeper relationship with your partner it\\u2019s important to be honest with them about what\\u2019s important to you and the relationship,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe mindful that honesty can connect you both, however, the way you deliver your message may disconnect you. To deepen your relationship, connect respectfully and kindly as you share your viewpoint with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Look in the mirror\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>To be honest with someone and be able to deepen your relationship with your partner, it\\u2019s essential to know yourself and your intentions.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cHave an honest look in the mirror to see if you would want to have a partner like you. We all have areas we could pull up our socks.\\u201d<\\/p><p><em>Guilty!<\\/em><\\/p><p>\\u201cReflect on whether removing resentment, complaining, sulking or snapping at them would improve the relationship. Reflect on areas you could offer more support, be kinder, or do more to improve the functioning of the home.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(16983,5089,'case_study_content_padding','a:3:{s:5:\"units\";s:2:\"px\";s:11:\"padding-top\";s:1:\"0\";s:14:\"padding-bottom\";s:4:\"95px\";}'),(16984,5089,'_oembed_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','<iframe title=\"Video Placeholder\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/XHOmBV4js_E?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen></iframe>'),(16985,5089,'_oembed_time_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','1587374837'),(16986,5089,'_wp_old_slug','find-yourself-of-julia'),(16987,5089,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(16988,5089,'case_customer','David Luis'),(16989,5089,'case_signs','Unstable psychology serious'),(16990,5089,'case_result','100% Psychological stability'),(16991,5089,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(16992,5089,'_edit_lock','1665973049:3'),(16993,5089,'_edit_last','3'),(16994,5089,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(16995,5089,'_wp_old_slug','mamamia'),(16997,5089,'_wp_old_date','2022-07-24'),(17030,5090,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17031,5090,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17032,5090,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17033,5090,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17034,5090,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/Cant-Be-Friends.png\",\"id\":5028,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-480,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"\\\"No, we can\'t be friends\\\": 12 Things Your Therapist Wants You To Know\",\"description_text\":\"3 June 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Ever wondered what your\\u00a0therapist\\u00a0is\\u00a0really\\u00a0thinking? Oh, phew! So it\'s not just us.<\\/p><p>It\'s a funny old thing, therapy. Not\\u00a0funny, funny - but you know we mean. Because more often than not, you don\'t really know what to expect if you\'ve never been before, right?<\\/p><p>Will it be like the movies? Will they show you those pictures of dark splotches and ask you what you see? Will they go home have a big gossip with their partner about all your secrets?? Omg, WILL THEY?<\\/p><p>The good news: Chances are, your therapist is nothing like what you\'ll see in movies and TV shows. Really!<\\/p><p>In fact, they\'re probably more like you than you might think.<\\/p><p>Watch: These signs will help you know if you should see a psychologist.<\\/p><p>And here\'s the thing - while it\'s always good to be able to\\u00a0seek out\\u00a0help from those around you, like your family and friends, sometimes you just need to chat with someone from outside of your circle. Someone who is like a blank sheet of paper.<\\/p><p>Below, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0to tell us everything she wants you to know about therapy..<\\/p><p>Take a seat.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. We understand that you may feel daunted or frightened about starting therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Sharing really intimate details about your life, your\\u00a0relationships\\u00a0and some of your\\u00a0deepest secrets\\u00a0to a complete stranger can feel super scary and daunting. Therapists get it.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most people come to therapy because they need it. This doesn\\u2019t mean that they want to go. And I can tell you, no one starts therapy for fun\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even though in my consulting room we have some fun,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that\\u00a0it can take time for some clients to feel safe in the space and that\\u2019s absolutely fine. You will feel safe when you feel safe and feel free to\\u00a0talk about this with your therapist.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. There\'s no experience needed\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Going to your first therapy session and nervous that you won\'t know what you need to... do or say? Don\'t worry - Abrahams said this is a really common feeling.<\\/p><p>\\\"Some people worry that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t know what to do in therapy and they may not be \\u201cgetting it right\\u201d as a client. Let me tell you now - there is no \'getting it right\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"All you need to do is bring yourself in - just as you are, no experience needed.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. We\\u2019ve seen it all\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Spoiler! While you might think you just have\\u00a0too much stuff,\\u00a0chances are your therapist has seen it all before. Your past behaviours, relationship struggles, life concerns - the whole shebang. Ten times over.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"So many people come to therapy worried that their therapist won\\u2019t be able to handle them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0that they\\u2019ll be too much,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though every client is unique and brings a different flavour to the therapy, an experienced therapist generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t be fazed by what you\\u2019re presenting with to have treated.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This doesn\\u2019t mean we don\\u2019t care or that we\\u2019re going through the motions\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we\\u2019re not. It\\u2019s that you\\u2019re unlikely to be shocking to us\\u00a0in any way.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, know that you\'re not \'too difficult\' to work with. The right therapist is out there for you.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. We understand fight-or-flight reactions\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Heard of a fight-or-flight response? It\'s basically a knee-jerk reaction to a past experience or event that you might perceive as stressful or frightening. Your pulse might start racing. Your breathing gets quicker. You feel tense. Uncomfortable.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>It\'s kind of like a psychological defence mechanism.<\\/p><p>\\\"We understand that\\u00a0you can have reactions to people and situations that trigger your fight-or-flight responses. Sometimes you may react as if you are being chased by a hungry bear,\\\" explains Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Your body has a cascading reaction where your adrenaline and cortisol levels surge, and your heart rate and blood pressure increase.\\\"<\\/p><p>While it can be scary, it\'s important to know that this is totally normal, and an experienced therapist will help you navigate the situation.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that in this mode, you may say or do things that may seem extreme. We help you understand these.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Your history matters\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most important things therapists want patients to understand is just how crucial it is to explore past and present experiences - even if you might not feel like it\'s relevant to why you\'re seeking help.<\\/p><p>\\\"Any good therapist understands that your history shapes everything about you. This includes the stories you tell yourself, your beliefs, values, expectations, how you relate to yourself and others, what makes you upset, fearful, or angry, and so much more.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Therapists understand that you\\u2019ve been consciously and unconsciously programmed from forces outside of your control\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we all have. They\\u2019ll work with you to understand how your programming is alive and kicking inside of you today and how your ego operates accordingly.\\\"<\\/p><p>Sometimes this can be incredibly tough and uncomfortable for people, especially when you\'ve experienced hurt in the past. So, be patient with yourself.<\\/p><p>\\\"Many of our clients have experienced childhood trauma and we help them understand how this impacts the way they function in their day-to-day lives.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Most parents do their best\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Fact: Blaming your parents for everything is not the goal here. Abrahams said it\'s about helping clients realise the reality that their parents may have done the best they can, and at the same time\\u00a0may have hurt you in ways you now struggle with.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most therapists understand that\\u00a0parents do their best. This doesn\\u2019t mean they always supported, cared or kept you safe. But most parents do their best, even though they have limitations and shortcomings. Therapy is not about blaming parents.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"Most parents are just operating from the program they received from their conscious and unconscious experiences. It\\u2019s important to understand how the limitations affected you and shaped you, yet to also understand most parents don\\u2019t try to\\u00a0hurt their children. They\\u2019re often preoccupied, stressed, and exhausted.\\\"<\\/p><p>The goal is to try to\\u00a0navigate the life you\'ve been given - because at the end of the day,\\u00a0you\'re the only one who can change it.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. We\'re non-judgemental\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said any good therapist will never judge their client - even when you feel like they\'re doing more listening than talking.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you ever do feel judged by your therapist, she said this is something you should bring up with them - it might seem really uncomfortable at first, but it\'s extremely important you voice your feelings.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists are non-judgemental therapists. How is a judgemental therapist helpful? Actually, they\\u2019re harmful. If your therapist is, call them out on it or find someone else who isn\\u2019t judgemental,\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"Our position is to help you understand how you operate and we do this alongside you\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not towering above you on a pedestal.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Your therapist is a mere mortal, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep, therapists are real people. And they\'re not perfect, either.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Clients often feel they need to see their therapist as angelic\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0those who are only good and perfect. Whenever I sense my clients are placing me in the \\u2018perfect\\u2019 bracket, I quickly let them know that there are no halos in my consulting room\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not on their heads and certainly not on mine.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I\\u2019m not perfect and nor is any therapist. We struggle like you do in life. We feel pain, sadness, anger and more. We have our battle scars and life experiences. We\\u2019re all mere mortals, and sometimes we handle life\\u2019s tribulations well, and sometimes we can stuff up royally.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Distress tolerance is everything\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, many clients come to see therapists because they have distress intolerance. This means they haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate upsetting emotions and sit with them.<\\/p><p>\\\"They didn\\u2019t learn this as a child through their\\u00a0parent-child relationship. This means that they suffer because they don\\u2019t understand that this unpleasant feeling inside them will pass.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"It feels catastrophic, and that\\u2019s where they look to the external world to make themselves feel better. This includes shopping, eating, restricting food, gambling, promiscuous sex, turning to drugs\\/alcohol, talking excessively with friends or creating drama.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on to explain that these actions in the outside world never resolve what\\u2019s going on inside - they\'re mere distractions that numb, but don\\u2019t address, what the unpleasant experience was.<\\/p><p>\\\"A good therapist will help you understand this and teach you other ways to tolerate the sensations inside you, such as breathing techniques and mindfulness.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. You leave a mark on our lives, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Any good therapist will truly want the best for you - and their investment in you often goes outside of the time you spend together. So, don\'t think that you\'re just another number.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though you\\u2019re the one who is going through a transformative experience with the therapist, you leave a mark on them, too,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"Our relationships are meaningful and real, and we care deeply about our clients\\u2019 wellbeing.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"I genuinely love my clients and my heart can bleed for them when they suffer and my heart can expand with joy at their development and other wonderful moments.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. No, we can\\u2019t be friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\'s common to develop a close relationship with your therapist, Abrahams said it\'s important to understand that you can\'t be friends with your therapist.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Awks, we know. But it\'s for the best.<\\/p><p>\\\"There are many clients who would like to be friends with their therapist. This shows that a great connection has been made. However, it\\u2019s important though to keep the relationship in the therapy-client space so that clients can always return for top-up sessions.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being friends with your therapist can create what\'s known as a \'conflicting dual relationship\', which is when people are in two very different relationships at the same time - and this presents a number of different challenges.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>So, yeah - it\'s both good and bad news. Don\'t ask your therapist around for dinner, friend.<\\/p><p>\\\"Your therapist holds your history in a particular way that no-one else does\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0besides you. It\\u2019s a special thing you share. You can make more friends of many different varieties, but having someone hold all of that knowledge of you and your work together is valuable and worthy of protection.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I had a client return for sessions yesterday after not seeing him for seven years. Whilst I don\\u2019t remember every detail of our time together, I certainly remember him and his essence. We were both able to pick back up and get back into the work together.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. We have a privileged role\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"Being a therapist is such privileged work, and most therapists take their role and responsibilities seriously.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"We know how transformative the experience of therapy can be and how profoundly it alters lives.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<strong><a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\">what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/a><\\/strong>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: Getty<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17035,5090,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(17036,5090,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17037,5090,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17038,5090,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17039,5090,'_elementor_css','a:7:{s:4:\"time\";i:1661503261;s:5:\"fonts\";a:0:{}s:5:\"icons\";a:0:{}s:20:\"dynamic_elements_ids\";a:0:{}s:6:\"status\";s:5:\"empty\";i:0;s:0:\"\";s:3:\"css\";s:0:\"\";}'),(17040,5091,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17041,5091,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17042,5091,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17043,5091,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17044,5091,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/Cant-Be-Friends.png\",\"id\":5028,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-480,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"\\\"No, we can\'t be friends\\\": 12 Things Your Therapist Wants You To Know\",\"description_text\":\"3 June 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Ever wondered what your\\u00a0therapist\\u00a0is\\u00a0really\\u00a0thinking? Oh, phew! So it\'s not just us.<\\/p><p>It\'s a funny old thing, therapy. Not\\u00a0funny, funny - but you know we mean. Because more often than not, you don\'t really know what to expect if you\'ve never been before, right?<\\/p><p>Will it be like the movies? Will they show you those pictures of dark splotches and ask you what you see? Will they go home have a big gossip with their partner about all your secrets?? Omg, WILL THEY?<\\/p><p>The good news: Chances are, your therapist is nothing like what you\'ll see in movies and TV shows. Really!<\\/p><p>In fact, they\'re probably more like you than you might think.<\\/p><p>Watch: These signs will help you know if you should see a psychologist.<\\/p><p>And here\'s the thing - while it\'s always good to be able to\\u00a0seek out\\u00a0help from those around you, like your family and friends, sometimes you just need to chat with someone from outside of your circle. Someone who is like a blank sheet of paper.<\\/p><p>Below, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0to tell us everything she wants you to know about therapy..<\\/p><p>Take a seat.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. We understand that you may feel daunted or frightened about starting therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Sharing really intimate details about your life, your\\u00a0relationships\\u00a0and some of your\\u00a0deepest secrets\\u00a0to a complete stranger can feel super scary and daunting. Therapists get it.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most people come to therapy because they need it. This doesn\\u2019t mean that they want to go. And I can tell you, no one starts therapy for fun\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even though in my consulting room we have some fun,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that\\u00a0it can take time for some clients to feel safe in the space and that\\u2019s absolutely fine. You will feel safe when you feel safe and feel free to\\u00a0talk about this with your therapist.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. There\'s no experience needed\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Going to your first therapy session and nervous that you won\'t know what you need to... do or say? Don\'t worry - Abrahams said this is a really common feeling.<\\/p><p>\\\"Some people worry that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t know what to do in therapy and they may not be \\u201cgetting it right\\u201d as a client. Let me tell you now - there is no \'getting it right\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"All you need to do is bring yourself in - just as you are, no experience needed.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. We\\u2019ve seen it all\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Spoiler! While you might think you just have\\u00a0too much stuff,\\u00a0chances are your therapist has seen it all before. Your past behaviours, relationship struggles, life concerns - the whole shebang. Ten times over.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"So many people come to therapy worried that their therapist won\\u2019t be able to handle them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0that they\\u2019ll be too much,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though every client is unique and brings a different flavour to the therapy, an experienced therapist generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t be fazed by what you\\u2019re presenting with to have treated.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This doesn\\u2019t mean we don\\u2019t care or that we\\u2019re going through the motions\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we\\u2019re not. It\\u2019s that you\\u2019re unlikely to be shocking to us\\u00a0in any way.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, know that you\'re not \'too difficult\' to work with. The right therapist is out there for you.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. We understand fight-or-flight reactions\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Heard of a fight-or-flight response? It\'s basically a knee-jerk reaction to a past experience or event that you might perceive as stressful or frightening. Your pulse might start racing. Your breathing gets quicker. You feel tense. Uncomfortable.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>It\'s kind of like a psychological defence mechanism.<\\/p><p>\\\"We understand that\\u00a0you can have reactions to people and situations that trigger your fight-or-flight responses. Sometimes you may react as if you are being chased by a hungry bear,\\\" explains Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Your body has a cascading reaction where your adrenaline and cortisol levels surge, and your heart rate and blood pressure increase.\\\"<\\/p><p>While it can be scary, it\'s important to know that this is totally normal, and an experienced therapist will help you navigate the situation.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that in this mode, you may say or do things that may seem extreme. We help you understand these.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Your history matters\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most important things therapists want patients to understand is just how crucial it is to explore past and present experiences - even if you might not feel like it\'s relevant to why you\'re seeking help.<\\/p><p>\\\"Any good therapist understands that your history shapes everything about you. This includes the stories you tell yourself, your beliefs, values, expectations, how you relate to yourself and others, what makes you upset, fearful, or angry, and so much more.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Therapists understand that you\\u2019ve been consciously and unconsciously programmed from forces outside of your control\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we all have. They\\u2019ll work with you to understand how your programming is alive and kicking inside of you today and how your ego operates accordingly.\\\"<\\/p><p>Sometimes this can be incredibly tough and uncomfortable for people, especially when you\'ve experienced hurt in the past. So, be patient with yourself.<\\/p><p>\\\"Many of our clients have experienced childhood trauma and we help them understand how this impacts the way they function in their day-to-day lives.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Most parents do their best\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Fact: Blaming your parents for everything is not the goal here. Abrahams said it\'s about helping clients realise the reality that their parents may have done the best they can, and at the same time\\u00a0may have hurt you in ways you now struggle with.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most therapists understand that\\u00a0parents do their best. This doesn\\u2019t mean they always supported, cared or kept you safe. But most parents do their best, even though they have limitations and shortcomings. Therapy is not about blaming parents.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"Most parents are just operating from the program they received from their conscious and unconscious experiences. It\\u2019s important to understand how the limitations affected you and shaped you, yet to also understand most parents don\\u2019t try to\\u00a0hurt their children. They\\u2019re often preoccupied, stressed, and exhausted.\\\"<\\/p><p>The goal is to try to\\u00a0navigate the life you\'ve been given - because at the end of the day,\\u00a0you\'re the only one who can change it.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. We\'re non-judgemental\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said any good therapist will never judge their client - even when you feel like they\'re doing more listening than talking.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you ever do feel judged by your therapist, she said this is something you should bring up with them - it might seem really uncomfortable at first, but it\'s extremely important you voice your feelings.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists are non-judgemental therapists. How is a judgemental therapist helpful? Actually, they\\u2019re harmful. If your therapist is, call them out on it or find someone else who isn\\u2019t judgemental,\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"Our position is to help you understand how you operate and we do this alongside you\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not towering above you on a pedestal.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Your therapist is a mere mortal, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep, therapists are real people. And they\'re not perfect, either.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Clients often feel they need to see their therapist as angelic\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0those who are only good and perfect. Whenever I sense my clients are placing me in the \\u2018perfect\\u2019 bracket, I quickly let them know that there are no halos in my consulting room\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not on their heads and certainly not on mine.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I\\u2019m not perfect and nor is any therapist. We struggle like you do in life. We feel pain, sadness, anger and more. We have our battle scars and life experiences. We\\u2019re all mere mortals, and sometimes we handle life\\u2019s tribulations well, and sometimes we can stuff up royally.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Distress tolerance is everything\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, many clients come to see therapists because they have distress intolerance. This means they haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate upsetting emotions and sit with them.<\\/p><p>\\\"They didn\\u2019t learn this as a child through their\\u00a0parent-child relationship. This means that they suffer because they don\\u2019t understand that this unpleasant feeling inside them will pass.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"It feels catastrophic, and that\\u2019s where they look to the external world to make themselves feel better. This includes shopping, eating, restricting food, gambling, promiscuous sex, turning to drugs\\/alcohol, talking excessively with friends or creating drama.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on to explain that these actions in the outside world never resolve what\\u2019s going on inside - they\'re mere distractions that numb, but don\\u2019t address, what the unpleasant experience was.<\\/p><p>\\\"A good therapist will help you understand this and teach you other ways to tolerate the sensations inside you, such as breathing techniques and mindfulness.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. You leave a mark on our lives, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Any good therapist will truly want the best for you - and their investment in you often goes outside of the time you spend together. So, don\'t think that you\'re just another number.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though you\\u2019re the one who is going through a transformative experience with the therapist, you leave a mark on them, too,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"Our relationships are meaningful and real, and we care deeply about our clients\\u2019 wellbeing.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"I genuinely love my clients and my heart can bleed for them when they suffer and my heart can expand with joy at their development and other wonderful moments.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. No, we can\\u2019t be friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\'s common to develop a close relationship with your therapist, Abrahams said it\'s important to understand that you can\'t be friends with your therapist.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Awks, we know. But it\'s for the best.<\\/p><p>\\\"There are many clients who would like to be friends with their therapist. This shows that a great connection has been made. However, it\\u2019s important though to keep the relationship in the therapy-client space so that clients can always return for top-up sessions.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being friends with your therapist can create what\'s known as a \'conflicting dual relationship\', which is when people are in two very different relationships at the same time - and this presents a number of different challenges.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>So, yeah - it\'s both good and bad news. Don\'t ask your therapist around for dinner, friend.<\\/p><p>\\\"Your therapist holds your history in a particular way that no-one else does\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0besides you. It\\u2019s a special thing you share. You can make more friends of many different varieties, but having someone hold all of that knowledge of you and your work together is valuable and worthy of protection.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I had a client return for sessions yesterday after not seeing him for seven years. Whilst I don\\u2019t remember every detail of our time together, I certainly remember him and his essence. We were both able to pick back up and get back into the work together.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. We have a privileged role\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"Being a therapist is such privileged work, and most therapists take their role and responsibilities seriously.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"We know how transformative the experience of therapy can be and how profoundly it alters lives.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<strong><a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\">what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/a><\\/strong>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. Her mission is to help as many people as possible transform their lives by creating happier and more loving relationships.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Feature image: Getty<\\/em><\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17045,5091,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(17046,5091,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17047,5091,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17048,5091,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17049,5091,'_elementor_css','a:7:{s:4:\"time\";i:1661503261;s:5:\"fonts\";a:0:{}s:5:\"icons\";a:0:{}s:20:\"dynamic_elements_ids\";a:0:{}s:6:\"status\";s:5:\"empty\";i:0;s:0:\"\";s:3:\"css\";s:0:\"\";}'),(17050,5092,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17051,5092,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17052,5092,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17053,5092,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17054,5092,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/Cant-Be-Friends.png\",\"id\":5028,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-480,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"\\\"No, we can\'t be friends\\\": 12 Things Your Therapist Wants You To Know\",\"description_text\":\"3 June 2022\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Ever wondered what your\\u00a0therapist\\u00a0is\\u00a0really\\u00a0thinking? Oh, phew! So it\'s not just us.<\\/p><p>It\'s a funny old thing, therapy. Not\\u00a0funny, funny - but you know we mean. Because more often than not, you don\'t really know what to expect if you\'ve never been before, right?<\\/p><p>Will it be like the movies? Will they show you those pictures of dark splotches and ask you what you see? Will they go home have a big gossip with their partner about all your secrets?? Omg, WILL THEY?<\\/p><p>The good news: Chances are, your therapist is nothing like what you\'ll see in movies and TV shows. Really!<\\/p><p>In fact, they\'re probably more like you than you might think.<\\/p><p>Watch: These signs will help you know if you should see a psychologist.<\\/p><p>And here\'s the thing - while it\'s always good to be able to\\u00a0seek out\\u00a0help from those around you, like your family and friends, sometimes you just need to chat with someone from outside of your circle. Someone who is like a blank sheet of paper.<\\/p><p>Below, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0to tell us everything she wants you to know about therapy..<\\/p><p>Take a seat.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. We understand that you may feel daunted or frightened about starting therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Sharing really intimate details about your life, your\\u00a0relationships\\u00a0and some of your\\u00a0deepest secrets\\u00a0to a complete stranger can feel super scary and daunting. Therapists get it.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most people come to therapy because they need it. This doesn\\u2019t mean that they want to go. And I can tell you, no one starts therapy for fun\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0even though in my consulting room we have some fun,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that\\u00a0it can take time for some clients to feel safe in the space and that\\u2019s absolutely fine. You will feel safe when you feel safe and feel free to\\u00a0talk about this with your therapist.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. There\'s no experience needed\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Going to your first therapy session and nervous that you won\'t know what you need to... do or say? Don\'t worry - Abrahams said this is a really common feeling.<\\/p><p>\\\"Some people worry that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t know what to do in therapy and they may not be \\u201cgetting it right\\u201d as a client. Let me tell you now - there is no \'getting it right\'.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"All you need to do is bring yourself in - just as you are, no experience needed.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. We\\u2019ve seen it all\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Spoiler! While you might think you just have\\u00a0too much stuff,\\u00a0chances are your therapist has seen it all before. Your past behaviours, relationship struggles, life concerns - the whole shebang. Ten times over.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"So many people come to therapy worried that their therapist won\\u2019t be able to handle them\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0that they\\u2019ll be too much,\\\" said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though every client is unique and brings a different flavour to the therapy, an experienced therapist generally\\u00a0won\\u2019t be fazed by what you\\u2019re presenting with to have treated.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"This doesn\\u2019t mean we don\\u2019t care or that we\\u2019re going through the motions\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we\\u2019re not. It\\u2019s that you\\u2019re unlikely to be shocking to us\\u00a0in any way.\\\"<\\/p><p>So, know that you\'re not \'too difficult\' to work with. The right therapist is out there for you.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. We understand fight-or-flight reactions\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Heard of a fight-or-flight response? It\'s basically a knee-jerk reaction to a past experience or event that you might perceive as stressful or frightening. Your pulse might start racing. Your breathing gets quicker. You feel tense. Uncomfortable.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>It\'s kind of like a psychological defence mechanism.<\\/p><p>\\\"We understand that\\u00a0you can have reactions to people and situations that trigger your fight-or-flight responses. Sometimes you may react as if you are being chased by a hungry bear,\\\" explains Abrahams.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Your body has a cascading reaction where your adrenaline and cortisol levels surge, and your heart rate and blood pressure increase.\\\"<\\/p><p>While it can be scary, it\'s important to know that this is totally normal, and an experienced therapist will help you navigate the situation.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists understand that in this mode, you may say or do things that may seem extreme. We help you understand these.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Your history matters\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>One of the most important things therapists want patients to understand is just how crucial it is to explore past and present experiences - even if you might not feel like it\'s relevant to why you\'re seeking help.<\\/p><p>\\\"Any good therapist understands that your history shapes everything about you. This includes the stories you tell yourself, your beliefs, values, expectations, how you relate to yourself and others, what makes you upset, fearful, or angry, and so much more.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Therapists understand that you\\u2019ve been consciously and unconsciously programmed from forces outside of your control\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0we all have. They\\u2019ll work with you to understand how your programming is alive and kicking inside of you today and how your ego operates accordingly.\\\"<\\/p><p>Sometimes this can be incredibly tough and uncomfortable for people, especially when you\'ve experienced hurt in the past. So, be patient with yourself.<\\/p><p>\\\"Many of our clients have experienced childhood trauma and we help them understand how this impacts the way they function in their day-to-day lives.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Most parents do their best\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Fact: Blaming your parents for everything is not the goal here. Abrahams said it\'s about helping clients realise the reality that their parents may have done the best they can, and at the same time\\u00a0may have hurt you in ways you now struggle with.<\\/p><p>\\\"Most therapists understand that\\u00a0parents do their best. This doesn\\u2019t mean they always supported, cared or kept you safe. But most parents do their best, even though they have limitations and shortcomings. Therapy is not about blaming parents.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"Most parents are just operating from the program they received from their conscious and unconscious experiences. It\\u2019s important to understand how the limitations affected you and shaped you, yet to also understand most parents don\\u2019t try to\\u00a0hurt their children. They\\u2019re often preoccupied, stressed, and exhausted.\\\"<\\/p><p>The goal is to try to\\u00a0navigate the life you\'ve been given - because at the end of the day,\\u00a0you\'re the only one who can change it.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. We\'re non-judgemental\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said any good therapist will never judge their client - even when you feel like they\'re doing more listening than talking.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>If you ever do feel judged by your therapist, she said this is something you should bring up with them - it might seem really uncomfortable at first, but it\'s extremely important you voice your feelings.<\\/p><p>\\\"Good therapists are non-judgemental therapists. How is a judgemental therapist helpful? Actually, they\\u2019re harmful. If your therapist is, call them out on it or find someone else who isn\\u2019t judgemental,\\\" she said.<\\/p><p>\\\"Our position is to help you understand how you operate and we do this alongside you\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not towering above you on a pedestal.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Your therapist is a mere mortal, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Yep, therapists are real people. And they\'re not perfect, either.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"Clients often feel they need to see their therapist as angelic\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0those who are only good and perfect. Whenever I sense my clients are placing me in the \\u2018perfect\\u2019 bracket, I quickly let them know that there are no halos in my consulting room\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0not on their heads and certainly not on mine.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I\\u2019m not perfect and nor is any therapist. We struggle like you do in life. We feel pain, sadness, anger and more. We have our battle scars and life experiences. We\\u2019re all mere mortals, and sometimes we handle life\\u2019s tribulations well, and sometimes we can stuff up royally.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Distress tolerance is everything\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, many clients come to see therapists because they have distress intolerance. This means they haven\\u2019t learnt how to tolerate upsetting emotions and sit with them.<\\/p><p>\\\"They didn\\u2019t learn this as a child through their\\u00a0parent-child relationship. This means that they suffer because they don\\u2019t understand that this unpleasant feeling inside them will pass.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"It feels catastrophic, and that\\u2019s where they look to the external world to make themselves feel better. This includes shopping, eating, restricting food, gambling, promiscuous sex, turning to drugs\\/alcohol, talking excessively with friends or creating drama.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Abrahams goes on to explain that these actions in the outside world never resolve what\\u2019s going on inside - they\'re mere distractions that numb, but don\\u2019t address, what the unpleasant experience was.<\\/p><p>\\\"A good therapist will help you understand this and teach you other ways to tolerate the sensations inside you, such as breathing techniques and mindfulness.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. You leave a mark on our lives, too\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Any good therapist will truly want the best for you - and their investment in you often goes outside of the time you spend together. So, don\'t think that you\'re just another number.<\\/p><p>\\\"Even though you\\u2019re the one who is going through a transformative experience with the therapist, you leave a mark on them, too,\\\" said Abrahams. \\\"Our relationships are meaningful and real, and we care deeply about our clients\\u2019 wellbeing.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"I genuinely love my clients and my heart can bleed for them when they suffer and my heart can expand with joy at their development and other wonderful moments.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. No, we can\\u2019t be friends\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>While it\'s common to develop a close relationship with your therapist, Abrahams said it\'s important to understand that you can\'t be friends with your therapist.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>Awks, we know. But it\'s for the best.<\\/p><p>\\\"There are many clients who would like to be friends with their therapist. This shows that a great connection has been made. However, it\\u2019s important though to keep the relationship in the therapy-client space so that clients can always return for top-up sessions.\\\"<\\/p><p>Being friends with your therapist can create what\'s known as a \'conflicting dual relationship\', which is when people are in two very different relationships at the same time - and this presents a number of different challenges.\\u00a0<\\/p><p>So, yeah - it\'s both good and bad news. Don\'t ask your therapist around for dinner, friend.<\\/p><p>\\\"Your therapist holds your history in a particular way that no-one else does\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0besides you. It\\u2019s a special thing you share. You can make more friends of many different varieties, but having someone hold all of that knowledge of you and your work together is valuable and worthy of protection.\\\"\\u00a0<\\/p><p>\\\"I had a client return for sessions yesterday after not seeing him for seven years. Whilst I don\\u2019t remember every detail of our time together, I certainly remember him and his essence. We were both able to pick back up and get back into the work together.\\\"<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. We have a privileged role\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said, \\\"Being a therapist is such privileged work, and most therapists take their role and responsibilities seriously.\\\"<\\/p><p>\\\"We know how transformative the experience of therapy can be and how profoundly it alters lives.\\\"<\\/p><p><em>If you would like to learn more from Lissy Abrahams, check out her e-book on\\u00a0<strong><a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/what-makes-a-couple-relationship-a-happy-one\\/\\\">what makes a couple\'s relationship happy<\\/a><\\/strong>.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0is part of Mamamia\'s health expert panel. She is a leading individual and couple psychotherapist who has dedicated her career to helping hundreds of clients navigate life\\u2019s obstacles and challenges. Lissy studied psychology in Sydney and then completed her Masters in couples psychotherapy at the internationally renowned Tavistock Relationships. Here, she worked therapeutically with couples, as well as lectured and tutored trainee counsellors.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy founded and manages the Sydney-based\\u00a0therapy\\u00a0clinic, Heath Group Practice, and works therapeutically with clients around the world. She has published academic work and launched a successful online course to help partners stop fighting and communicate respectfully.<\\/em><\\/p><p><em>Lissy believes we all have the capacity to improve our lives and relationships with the right knowledge and practical strategies. 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"12 rules that will help deepen your relationship\",\"description_text\":\"19 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Beyond the cute Instagram posts and meme tagging, relationships can be fickle AF. Because even if you\\u2019re head over heels for someone, there\\u2019s still going to be those s**tty moments of uncertainty, frustration, and confusion.<\\/p><p>But working on having a deeper relationship with your partner and ensuring you have a strong connection will ultimately mean that during these kinds of moments, you\\u2019ll be able to work through it together.<\\/p><p>As with most relationship things, it all starts with the one key need:\\u00a0communication.<\\/p><p>While it takes time and effort, the good news is that it doesn\\u2019t have to be difficult. And over time, you\\u2019ll find you have fewer lows \\u2013 all thanks to your connection.<\\/p><p>Here are 12 rules that will help deepen your relationship, according to couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Look after yourself\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to being in a relationship, we can often end up spending so much of our time and energy on the other person, that many of us lose sight of ourselves and take the back seat.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is especially the case if we do not have a strong enough sense of self,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cI\\u2019ve seen many people become preoccupied with their partner and their needs and neglect their own.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Sad!<\\/p><p>Abrahams said one of the best ways we can\\u00a0improve our relationship\\u00a0is by bringing our healthiest selves into the relationship and maintaining this \\u2013 so try to concentrate on developing yourself and who you are before focusing on someone else.<\\/p><p>Go on, you got this!<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to look after our mind, body, and spirit,\\u201d reminds Abrahams. \\u201cWhen we do this, we keep toxicity at bay so we can spend our time connecting and being intimate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Check your ego\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>That voice inside your head? That\\u2019s your ego. And it can do a lot of\\u00a0 things \\u00a0to a relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cOur ego holds our conscious and unconscious beliefs and expectations about relationships. Think of it as a relational template that we operate from,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo deepen our relationship with our partner, we need to remember that our relational template will be different from theirs.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there will always be a gap between our templates that we need to resolve \\u2013 and that\\u2019s okay.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat matters is how well we both navigate the gap. If we can discuss and work through difficulties, we will deepen the relationship. However, if the gap causes us fear and anxiety, then we may have a lot of conflicts instead.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Keep sexual intimacy on the agenda\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>You know how it gets. Life is busy. There\\u2019s work. Kids. Social engagements. Netflix. Sometimes it seems like relationships (and intimacy) get placed on the back burner, while we go about our business and focus on all the glorious stresses daily life has to offer.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have busy lives with many competing demands\\u00a0at any given moment. This is even more the case if we have children. We need to take care as\\u00a0sexual intimacy\\u00a0can decrease quickly in couple relationships,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s okay to be too tired to have sex at times,\\u00a0if we are too tired too often it can really harm the relationship. Without this, there\\u2019s a kind of\\u2026 gap.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt reveals that our relationship is at the bottom of our priority list. I believe this is a huge mistake. This breeds loneliness, shame about feeling undesirable, or shame about being a low- or\\u00a0no-sex couple.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSex is what\\u00a0makes the couple relationship different from other relationships, and without it, we can feel like flatmates or siblings. Sex is often a special glue that deepens our connection and holds a relationship together.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Keep emotional intimacy alive\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>And it\\u2019s not just sexual intimacy \\u2013 the same goes for\\u00a0emotional\\u00a0intimacy, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we take our eyes off emotional intimacy in our\\u00a0couple relationship, we open the door to disharmony and conflict,\\u201d said Abrahams, who said all humans need connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe are social animals, and connection with our partner helps us feel safe and secure in the world.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout the emotional connection, we no longer feel safe. We can feel lonely, depressed, or anxious that our relationship is in trouble or may even end. Emotional connection and intimacy is a crucial ingredient for a deeper relationship.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Focus and get in sync\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>How much time do you spend together after work? On the weekends? Be honest.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIn a world that continuously competes for our attention, we can find it difficult to pay attention and listen to our partner. We have work emails coming in, Netflix programs to watch, or our mobile notifying us every other second to pay attention,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When this happens, Abrahams said we may lose sight of our partner\\u2019s need to communicate with us.<\\/p><p>When you create a fulfilling routine with your partner, you\\u2019ll find you\\u2019re able to spend more quality time together and reconnect with one another.<\\/p><p>It could be as simple as going for a walk together after work, or waking up at the same time and making breakfast together in the morning.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey need us to focus, listen, and get in sync with them. This will deepen our relationship as we are showing them that\\u00a0we value, love, and respect them above everything else,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will feel a deeper connection with us too. The opposite damages relationships. When we don\\u2019t focus or pretend to listen, our partner can tell feel we\\u2019re not properly with them, and this often causes upset or anger.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Go to couples therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another way to deepen your connection with your partner is to get to know them through the help of a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be life-transforming as couples therapy allows you to understand why you both behave or think as you do, and where you are so different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTherapy also helps you both understand where these thoughts and behaviours came from. This experience will stay with you forever and have such a positive impact on you both for the years ahead.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. Honest communication\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Honesty is one of the biggest core values every couple needs in their relationship \\u2013 without it, things will kind of just fall apart.<\\/p><p>Opening up and being truthful with your partner about what you both want from the relationship, is key to establishing a strong foundation for trust and connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo have a deeper relationship with your partner it\\u2019s important to be honest with them about what\\u2019s important to you and the relationship,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe mindful that honesty can connect you both, however, the way you deliver your message may disconnect you. To deepen your relationship, connect respectfully and kindly as you share your viewpoint with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Look in the mirror\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>To be honest with someone and be able to deepen your relationship with your partner, it\\u2019s essential to know yourself and your intentions.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cHave an honest look in the mirror to see if you would want to have a partner like you. We all have areas we could pull up our socks.\\u201d<\\/p><p><em>Guilty!<\\/em><\\/p><p>\\u201cReflect on whether removing resentment, complaining, sulking or snapping at them would improve the relationship. Reflect on areas you could offer more support, be kinder, or do more to improve the functioning of the home.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17065,5093,'_thumbnail_id','5002'),(17066,5093,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17067,5093,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17068,5093,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17069,5093,'_elementor_css','a:7:{s:4:\"time\";i:1661503261;s:5:\"fonts\";a:0:{}s:5:\"icons\";a:0:{}s:20:\"dynamic_elements_ids\";a:0:{}s:6:\"status\";s:5:\"empty\";i:0;s:0:\"\";s:3:\"css\";s:0:\"\";}'),(17070,5094,'custom_pagetitle','hide'),(17071,5094,'portfolio_content_padding','a:3:{s:11:\"padding-top\";s:1:\"0\";s:14:\"padding-bottom\";s:0:\"\";s:5:\"units\";s:2:\"px\";}'),(17072,5094,'case_study_gallery_lightbox','1'),(17073,5094,'case_study_gallery',''),(17074,5094,'wg_client',''),(17075,5094,'wg_construction_date',''),(17076,5094,'wg_location',''),(17077,5094,'wg_gardener',''),(17078,5094,'wg_completed_date',''),(17079,5094,'wg_price',''),(17080,5094,'wg_download_1',''),(17081,5094,'wg_download_2',''),(17082,5094,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17083,5094,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17084,5094,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17085,5094,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17086,5094,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_706770283-1024x683-1.jpg\",\"id\":5000,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-248,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"MamaM!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"13 signs you\\u2019re a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019, and what that means for your relationships\",\"description_text\":\"16 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Whether you\\u2019ve watched\\u00a0The White Lotus\\u00a0or not (where have you been?!), you\\u2019re probably familiar with the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019. Yeah? It\\u2019s the diagnosis that\\u2019s popping up\\u00a0everywhere\\u00a0right now \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got tons of people suddenly identifying themselves as HSPs.<\\/p><p>But while it might seem like a new\\u00a0Gen Z\\u00a0kinda thing, HSP is actually a very real trait that means a lot more than just being \\u201ctoo sensitive\\u201d.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re a HSP, essentially you\\u2019ll have a heightened sensory system, meaning you\\u2019re increasingly sensitive to physical, emotional and social stimuli \\u2013 everything from sights to sounds and textures.<\\/p><p>In saying that, it\\u2019s nothing major to worry about \\u2013 so don\\u2019t freak out. Being a highly sensitive person doesn\\u2019t affect your health in any way (it\\u2019s a normal trait), and is actually often seen as something that is quite beneficial.<\\/p><p>However, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deep.<\\/p><p>Here, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0everything we need to know about HSPs \\u2013 and what kind of impact it might have on our relationships.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 diagnosis?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Originally coined by researcher\\u00a0Dr Elaine Aron\\u00a0in the early 90s, HSP is not really a disorder or diagnosis.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is a personality trait which has a particular pattern of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are consistent and stable across one\\u2019s lifespan. Another example of a personality trait is introversion or extroversion,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is not a disorder; it is a sensitivity, and its scientific name is Sensory-Processing Sensitivity. There is sensory processing disorder, which is a condition where the response to sensory input is impaired. For HSPs there is no impairment, however they have a stronger reaction than those without the sensitivity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to research by Dr Aron, HSP is completely normal and something that is found in 15 to 20 per cent of the population. Meaning? Around one in five people will be HSPs.<\\/p><p>So, chances are you either know one or you are one.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is innate and also evident in other species. Being HSPs may increase their chances of survival as HSPs observe and reflect on the subtleties of others before acting.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, while HSPs might easily notice details and patterns that others miss, the drawback is that HSPs can get easily overwhelmed.<\\/p><p>Think of 15 people calling and texting you at the same time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSPs expend their energy noticing people and environmental stimuli. Therefore, they often withdraw to replenish their energy and calm down their nervous system,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are often overstimulated and easily overwhelmed. This makes them sensitive to sounds or light or crowds.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the signs of a highly sensitive person?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Okay, so how do you actually ~know~ if you\\u2019re on the HSP side of things? Well, according to Abrahams, there are 13 common symptoms that are related to HSP.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to point out that not\\u00a0all\\u00a0of\\u00a0these will resonate with someone on the sensitivity spectrum, yeah?<\\/p><p>As per Abrahams, HSPs typically experience many of the below -<\\/p><ol><li>Easily overwhelmed by external stimuli (lights, strong smells and sounds).<\\/li><li>Easily overwhelmed by internal stimuli (thought, emotions and realisations).<\\/li><li>Higher empathy and awareness of other\\u2019s needs.<\\/li><li>Aversion to large groups or crowds.<\\/li><li>Rattled when they feel time pressured.<\\/li><li>Avoid violent movies and TV shows.<\\/li><li>Need alone time as can experience overwhelm, exhaustion and even burnout.<\\/li><li>Often withdraw to get relief into a private space.<\\/li><li>Arrange their lives to avoid situations where they will feel upset or overwhelmed.<\\/li><li>They notice or enjoy delicate scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art.<\\/li><li>They have a rich and complex inner life (intuition or creativity).<\\/li><li>Difficulty with transitions and changes.<\\/li><li>Were often sensitive or shy as a child.<\\/li><\\/ol>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Are empaths and highly sensitive persons linked?\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Well, not necessarily. While the two do share some common traits and crossovers, they also have a lot of differences, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe Dr Judith Orloff\\u2019s notion of an empathic spectrum describes the difference between HSPs and empaths well, and it is a matter of degrees of empathy that distinguish them,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can imagine a spectrum moving from no empathy on the left of the spectrum (those who are deficient in empathy such as\\u00a0narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths) to normal loving, empathic people as you move along the spectrum, to HSPs and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.\\u201d<\\/p><p>To give you an idea of what this might look like, here\\u2019s what the Empathic Spectrum looks like below -\\u00a0<\\/p><p><img class=\\\"alignnone wp-image-5096 size-large\\\" src=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2021\\/12\\/Empaths-HSPs-Linked-1024x141.png\\\" alt=\\\"\\\" width=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"88\\\" \\/><\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>While empaths share all the traits of HSPs, Abrahams said the main difference is that \\u201cempaths take the empathic experience much further and absorb even more of the emotional energy or stimuli from others and the environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, it\\u2019s kind of like an accelerated version of HSPs, where they\\u2019re wired to process other people\\u2019s feelings more intensely, effecting them in numerous ways.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see empaths as being more porous than HSPs, as if they have less of an internal\\/external boundary\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where it is difficult to differentiate between what is my stuff and what is your stuff? It all becomes the empath\\u2019s stuff and they often cannot tell the difference as they internalise the feelings and pain of others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths differ from HSPs as many empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, and to animals and nature. This is not part of the HSP personality trait.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why is there such a buzz around the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering why there\\u2019s suddenly so much talk around a term that\\u2019s been around for\\u00a0yonks, so are we. But according to Abrahams, there are a few reasons behind it \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got nothing to do with\\u00a0The\\u00a0White Lotus.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans love to categorise and put people in understandable boxes. We have done this forever by declaring someone is narcissistic or borderline or bipolar if we don\\u2019t understand or appreciate their behaviour,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the unqualified diagnosis and labelling someone HSP is similar, where we have deemed their behaviour as \\u2018too sensitive\\u2019 and clearly a failing of some sort.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And you know who\\u2019s sitting at the crux of it? You guessed it\\u2026<\\/p><p>\\u201cMillennials are often the target of this unprofessional diagnosis, with the notion that they have all been wrapped in cotton wool. Calling them HSPs implies they are a \\u2018snowflake\\u2019\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where they lack resilience and are more prone to taking offence. This does not recognise the gifts and limitations in combination that HSPs experience.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the term is being overused without understanding the impact the sensitivity has on the person,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How being a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 can impact your relationships.\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Relationships can be\\u00a0complicated AF \\u2013 no matter your personality type. But being a HSP and having this kind of deep emotional intelligence can heighten a lot of the usual nuances \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s with your friends, family or significant other.<\\/p><p>Below are some of the native impacts being a HSP can have on your relationships...<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional self-regulation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cEven though HSPs may have a high awareness of themselves and others\\u2019 emotional states, it does not mean that they can necessarily\\u00a0handle negative emotions inside of themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s usually absent is the regulation of emotions, with HSPs feeling overwhelmed at higher levels than others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen this happens, they can feel fear, anger, shame or sadness that they express impulsively in an outburst,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can lead to conflict with their partner who may feel attacked, shamed or blindsided by what their HSP partner saw.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For those who cannot self regulate this trait, it can end up being a case where you are able to be sensitive and aware of others, but unable to support your own wellbeing.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional challenges\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cHSPs take on the feelings of their partner and others which leaves them affected by changes of states in others. This can be difficult in a relationship; we all need to be able to\\u00a0have emotional variations in our day-to-day lives without something always \\u2018being wrong\\u2019 or needing attention brought to it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This might mean there\\u2019s way too much focus on everyone else around you, and not enough focus on yourself.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, Abrahams said HSPs often have emotional or interpersonal challenges in that they often want others to be more like them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst they may be aware and sensitive to others, they also feel upset when they feel others don\\u2019t meet their standards or feel sufficient reciprocation of similar care, thought about them,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt can feel lonely and there is often a large gap between how the HSP thinks about others and their needs versus what they receive in return.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can feel disappointed, anxious, depressed by this gap. Some can also be highly critical of those who fall short. As said previously, emotional awareness does not necessarily\\u00a0mean the HSP has the ability to regulate their emotions.\\u201d\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Restriction on one\\u2019s partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, HSPs often have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate TV shows where there is horror or for some even thrillers, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>Um. We feel\\u2026 seen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis means they create rules so that they do not become overwhelmed. In a relationship, a partner or family member will be restricted by the conditions imposed on them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>This might include restrictions on what TV shows or movies are acceptable. If you\\u2019re the kind of\\u00a0person who hides behind the sofa\\u00a0during a cringe-y movie or a thriller \\u2013 you know what we\\u2019re talking about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe problem when viewing is that HSPs never know when the tension or suspense will increase, and all of a sudden it becomes too much to handle.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same goes for music, with Abrahams saying that some HSPs may be able to\\u00a0tolerate rock or pop music yet unable to tolerate their partner\\u2019s jazz music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe partner may only feel free to\\u00a0listen to this when they are alone as they don\\u2019t want to impose the jazz on their partner and cause them to suffer.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Avoid, miss out and have FOMO\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Because HSPs find it hard to be reactive and overstimulated by the environment, Abrahams said they will often opt out of arrangements with their partner, friends, or family when they know that\\u00a0they will struggle.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is because their discomfort is not mild, for HSPs the environment becomes unbearable, and this will alter their emotional state immediately. For many they cannot go to concerts as they are too loud, shopping centres are too crowded, and even the sun is too bright.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Fatigue\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Being an emotional sponge for everyone around you can be\\u2026 exhausting.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is tiring to be so overstimulated by the environment and other\\u2019s emotions. HSPs often focus on their energy levels and pay a hefty price when they are exhausted. In a relationship, they can be the couple handbrake or the killjoy.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For HSPs, sleep is a way to soothe their over-worked senses. So when they don\\u2019t get enough sleep \\u2013 everything kind of\\u00a0goes to sh*t.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTheir partner often needs to make concessions around them, such as leaving early or going alone even though they want their partner with them. It is frustrating for both partners and life limiting.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Prioritising self-care\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Abrahams said HSPs need to take close care of their mental and physical wellbeing as they are more susceptible to burnout.<\\/p><p>\\u201cFor the HSP they need to prioritise sufficient sleep, sufficient down time following overstimulation and healthy food.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While it might seem just like a little bit of harmless self-care, Abrahams said having a relationship with an HSP may be limiting for some partners.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe relationship may lack spontaneity, and one\\u2019s partner may get tired of generating ideas that are rejected due to the need for self-care and the threat of overstimulation.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"The positives of being a highly sensitive person\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>But!\\u00a0It\\u2019s not all bad! Promise, you guys. On the flip side of things, there can be numerous benefits to relationships with HSPs.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said some of the positive impacts include...<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"823b853\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ef6d43\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c87660a\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Kindness\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"7ed68e2\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f250982\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cffbde8\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cHSPs can be kind and caring of their partner, often focusing on their wellbeing. They have a lot to give. The health of the relationship matters a lot to them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"2d794f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d26ea59\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"74368d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Creative, appreciating and sharing with one\\u2019s partner and others\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6985cfc\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"86103f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f5f3cc3\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If a HSP has an interest in arts and music, Abrahams said they will usually possess the ability to be able to\\u00a0tap into more of the emotional experience created by the artist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is likely that their emotional awareness to others, art, music and the environment hooks into their being and allows them a deeper connection with their visual, auditory, and emotional world,\\u201d she adds.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be shared with one\\u2019s partner and they develop a deeper understanding of these landscapes too. The partner of an HSP can overtime develop a deeper understanding of people\\u2019s minds, intentions and motivation.\\u201d<\\/p><p>How cool is that!<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is a rich and fascinating world that the HSPs can bring to others and offer different perspectives, show curiosity for others, and be generous of themselves. Others may benefit greatly\\u00a0from their emotional wisdom.\\u201d<\\/p><p>While the idea of having superhuman emotional intelligence might sound like fun, Abrahams said it\\u2019s important to acknowledge both the \\u2018good\\u2019 and \\u2018bad\\u2019 aspects of the trait.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst it can be an asset to have emotional intelligence, it is not given without a price being paid. It\\u2019s like superman having incredible powers to fly, change time and save people, until he encounters a blob of kryptonite that weakens him completely, taking him out.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe should not overvalue the benefits and gifts HSPs have and ignore the price paid for the gift. It\\u2019s a package deal.\\u201d<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re a HSP and you\\u2019re looking for some help in improving your communication with your partner, Abrahams has a free e-book available\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17087,5094,'case_study_content_padding','a:3:{s:5:\"units\";s:2:\"px\";s:11:\"padding-top\";s:1:\"0\";s:14:\"padding-bottom\";s:4:\"95px\";}'),(17088,5094,'_oembed_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','<iframe title=\"Video Placeholder\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/XHOmBV4js_E?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen></iframe>'),(17089,5094,'_oembed_time_1b36688543d4d62a4a94550f822b61eb','1587374837'),(17090,5094,'_wp_old_slug','find-yourself-of-julia'),(17091,5094,'_thumbnail_id','5000'),(17092,5094,'case_customer','David Luis'),(17093,5094,'case_signs','Unstable psychology serious'),(17094,5094,'case_result','100% Psychological stability'),(17095,5094,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17096,5094,'_edit_lock','1665973057:3'),(17097,5094,'_edit_last','3'),(17098,5094,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17099,5094,'_wp_old_slug','mamamia'),(17101,5094,'_wp_old_date','2022-07-24'),(17134,5095,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17135,5095,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17136,5095,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17137,5095,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17138,5095,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_479612449-768x513-1.jpg\",\"id\":5002,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-281,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"12 rules that will help deepen your relationship\",\"description_text\":\"19 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Beyond the cute Instagram posts and meme tagging, relationships can be fickle AF. Because even if you\\u2019re head over heels for someone, there\\u2019s still going to be those s**tty moments of uncertainty, frustration, and confusion.<\\/p><p>But working on having a deeper relationship with your partner and ensuring you have a strong connection will ultimately mean that during these kinds of moments, you\\u2019ll be able to work through it together.<\\/p><p>As with most relationship things, it all starts with the one key need:\\u00a0communication.<\\/p><p>While it takes time and effort, the good news is that it doesn\\u2019t have to be difficult. And over time, you\\u2019ll find you have fewer lows \\u2013 all thanks to your connection.<\\/p><p>Here are 12 rules that will help deepen your relationship, according to couples counsellor\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"1. Look after yourself\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>When it comes to being in a relationship, we can often end up spending so much of our time and energy on the other person, that many of us lose sight of ourselves and take the back seat.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis is especially the case if we do not have a strong enough sense of self,\\u201d said Abrahams. \\u201cI\\u2019ve seen many people become preoccupied with their partner and their needs and neglect their own.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Sad!<\\/p><p>Abrahams said one of the best ways we can\\u00a0improve our relationship\\u00a0is by bringing our healthiest selves into the relationship and maintaining this \\u2013 so try to concentrate on developing yourself and who you are before focusing on someone else.<\\/p><p>Go on, you got this!<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe need to look after our mind, body, and spirit,\\u201d reminds Abrahams. \\u201cWhen we do this, we keep toxicity at bay so we can spend our time connecting and being intimate.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"2. Check your ego\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>That voice inside your head? That\\u2019s your ego. And it can do a lot of\\u00a0 things \\u00a0to a relationship.<\\/p><p>\\u201cOur ego holds our conscious and unconscious beliefs and expectations about relationships. Think of it as a relational template that we operate from,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo deepen our relationship with our partner, we need to remember that our relational template will be different from theirs.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to Abrahams, there will always be a gap between our templates that we need to resolve \\u2013 and that\\u2019s okay.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhat matters is how well we both navigate the gap. If we can discuss and work through difficulties, we will deepen the relationship. However, if the gap causes us fear and anxiety, then we may have a lot of conflicts instead.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"3. Keep sexual intimacy on the agenda\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>You know how it gets. Life is busy. There\\u2019s work. Kids. Social engagements. Netflix. Sometimes it seems like relationships (and intimacy) get placed on the back burner, while we go about our business and focus on all the glorious stresses daily life has to offer.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe all have busy lives with many competing demands\\u00a0at any given moment. This is even more the case if we have children. We need to take care as\\u00a0sexual intimacy\\u00a0can decrease quickly in couple relationships,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>While it\\u2019s okay to be too tired to have sex at times,\\u00a0if we are too tired too often it can really harm the relationship. Without this, there\\u2019s a kind of\\u2026 gap.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt reveals that our relationship is at the bottom of our priority list. I believe this is a huge mistake. This breeds loneliness, shame about feeling undesirable, or shame about being a low- or\\u00a0no-sex couple.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cSex is what\\u00a0makes the couple relationship different from other relationships, and without it, we can feel like flatmates or siblings. Sex is often a special glue that deepens our connection and holds a relationship together.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"4. Keep emotional intimacy alive\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>And it\\u2019s not just sexual intimacy \\u2013 the same goes for\\u00a0emotional\\u00a0intimacy, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen we take our eyes off emotional intimacy in our\\u00a0couple relationship, we open the door to disharmony and conflict,\\u201d said Abrahams, who said all humans need connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe are social animals, and connection with our partner helps us feel safe and secure in the world.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWithout the emotional connection, we no longer feel safe. We can feel lonely, depressed, or anxious that our relationship is in trouble or may even end. Emotional connection and intimacy is a crucial ingredient for a deeper relationship.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"5. Focus and get in sync\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>How much time do you spend together after work? On the weekends? Be honest.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIn a world that continuously competes for our attention, we can find it difficult to pay attention and listen to our partner. We have work emails coming in, Netflix programs to watch, or our mobile notifying us every other second to pay attention,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>When this happens, Abrahams said we may lose sight of our partner\\u2019s need to communicate with us.<\\/p><p>When you create a fulfilling routine with your partner, you\\u2019ll find you\\u2019re able to spend more quality time together and reconnect with one another.<\\/p><p>It could be as simple as going for a walk together after work, or waking up at the same time and making breakfast together in the morning.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey need us to focus, listen, and get in sync with them. This will deepen our relationship as we are showing them that\\u00a0we value, love, and respect them above everything else,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey will feel a deeper connection with us too. The opposite damages relationships. When we don\\u2019t focus or pretend to listen, our partner can tell feel we\\u2019re not properly with them, and this often causes upset or anger.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"6. Go to couples therapy\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Another way to deepen your connection with your partner is to get to know them through the help of a therapist.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can be life-transforming as couples therapy allows you to understand why you both behave or think as you do, and where you are so different,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTherapy also helps you both understand where these thoughts and behaviours came from. This experience will stay with you forever and have such a positive impact on you both for the years ahead.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"7. Honest communication\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Honesty is one of the biggest core values every couple needs in their relationship \\u2013 without it, things will kind of just fall apart.<\\/p><p>Opening up and being truthful with your partner about what you both want from the relationship, is key to establishing a strong foundation for trust and connection.<\\/p><p>\\u201cTo have a deeper relationship with your partner it\\u2019s important to be honest with them about what\\u2019s important to you and the relationship,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBe mindful that honesty can connect you both, however, the way you deliver your message may disconnect you. To deepen your relationship, connect respectfully and kindly as you share your viewpoint with them.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"8. Look in the mirror\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>To be honest with someone and be able to deepen your relationship with your partner, it\\u2019s essential to know yourself and your intentions.<\\/p><p>Abrahams said, \\u201cHave an honest look in the mirror to see if you would want to have a partner like you. We all have areas we could pull up our socks.\\u201d<\\/p><p><em>Guilty!<\\/em><\\/p><p>\\u201cReflect on whether removing resentment, complaining, sulking or snapping at them would improve the relationship. Reflect on areas you could offer more support, be kinder, or do more to improve the functioning of the home.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a 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- source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"13 signs you\\u2019re a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019, and what that means for your relationships\",\"description_text\":\"16 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Whether you\\u2019ve watched\\u00a0The White Lotus\\u00a0or not (where have you been?!), you\\u2019re probably familiar with the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019. Yeah? It\\u2019s the diagnosis that\\u2019s popping up\\u00a0everywhere\\u00a0right now \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got tons of people suddenly identifying themselves as HSPs.<\\/p><p>But while it might seem like a new\\u00a0Gen Z\\u00a0kinda thing, HSP is actually a very real trait that means a lot more than just being \\u201ctoo sensitive\\u201d.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re a HSP, essentially you\\u2019ll have a heightened sensory system, meaning you\\u2019re increasingly sensitive to physical, emotional and social stimuli \\u2013 everything from sights to sounds and textures.<\\/p><p>In saying that, it\\u2019s nothing major to worry about \\u2013 so don\\u2019t freak out. Being a highly sensitive person doesn\\u2019t affect your health in any way (it\\u2019s a normal trait), and is actually often seen as something that is quite beneficial.<\\/p><p>However, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deep.<\\/p><p>Here, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0everything we need to know about HSPs \\u2013 and what kind of impact it might have on our relationships.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 diagnosis?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Originally coined by researcher\\u00a0Dr Elaine Aron\\u00a0in the early 90s, HSP is not really a disorder or diagnosis.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is a personality trait which has a particular pattern of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are consistent and stable across one\\u2019s lifespan. Another example of a personality trait is introversion or extroversion,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is not a disorder; it is a sensitivity, and its scientific name is Sensory-Processing Sensitivity. There is sensory processing disorder, which is a condition where the response to sensory input is impaired. For HSPs there is no impairment, however they have a stronger reaction than those without the sensitivity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to research by Dr Aron, HSP is completely normal and something that is found in 15 to 20 per cent of the population. Meaning? Around one in five people will be HSPs.<\\/p><p>So, chances are you either know one or you are one.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is innate and also evident in other species. Being HSPs may increase their chances of survival as HSPs observe and reflect on the subtleties of others before acting.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, while HSPs might easily notice details and patterns that others miss, the drawback is that HSPs can get easily overwhelmed.<\\/p><p>Think of 15 people calling and texting you at the same time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSPs expend their energy noticing people and environmental stimuli. Therefore, they often withdraw to replenish their energy and calm down their nervous system,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are often overstimulated and easily overwhelmed. This makes them sensitive to sounds or light or crowds.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the signs of a highly sensitive person?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Okay, so how do you actually ~know~ if you\\u2019re on the HSP side of things? Well, according to Abrahams, there are 13 common symptoms that are related to HSP.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to point out that not\\u00a0all\\u00a0of\\u00a0these will resonate with someone on the sensitivity spectrum, yeah?<\\/p><p>As per Abrahams, HSPs typically experience many of the below -<\\/p><ol><li>Easily overwhelmed by external stimuli (lights, strong smells and sounds).<\\/li><li>Easily overwhelmed by internal stimuli (thought, emotions and realisations).<\\/li><li>Higher empathy and awareness of other\\u2019s needs.<\\/li><li>Aversion to large groups or crowds.<\\/li><li>Rattled when they feel time pressured.<\\/li><li>Avoid violent movies and TV shows.<\\/li><li>Need alone time as can experience overwhelm, exhaustion and even burnout.<\\/li><li>Often withdraw to get relief into a private space.<\\/li><li>Arrange their lives to avoid situations where they will feel upset or overwhelmed.<\\/li><li>They notice or enjoy delicate scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art.<\\/li><li>They have a rich and complex inner life (intuition or creativity).<\\/li><li>Difficulty with transitions and changes.<\\/li><li>Were often sensitive or shy as a child.<\\/li><\\/ol>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Are empaths and highly sensitive persons linked?\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Well, not necessarily. While the two do share some common traits and crossovers, they also have a lot of differences, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe Dr Judith Orloff\\u2019s notion of an empathic spectrum describes the difference between HSPs and empaths well, and it is a matter of degrees of empathy that distinguish them,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can imagine a spectrum moving from no empathy on the left of the spectrum (those who are deficient in empathy such as\\u00a0narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths) to normal loving, empathic people as you move along the spectrum, to HSPs and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.\\u201d<\\/p><p>To give you an idea of what this might look like, here\\u2019s what the Empathic Spectrum looks like below -\\u00a0<\\/p><p><img class=\\\"alignnone wp-image-5096 size-large\\\" src=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2021\\/12\\/Empaths-HSPs-Linked-1024x141.png\\\" alt=\\\"\\\" width=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"88\\\" \\/><\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>While empaths share all the traits of HSPs, Abrahams said the main difference is that \\u201cempaths take the empathic experience much further and absorb even more of the emotional energy or stimuli from others and the environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, it\\u2019s kind of like an accelerated version of HSPs, where they\\u2019re wired to process other people\\u2019s feelings more intensely, effecting them in numerous ways.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see empaths as being more porous than HSPs, as if they have less of an internal\\/external boundary\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where it is difficult to differentiate between what is my stuff and what is your stuff? It all becomes the empath\\u2019s stuff and they often cannot tell the difference as they internalise the feelings and pain of others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths differ from HSPs as many empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, and to animals and nature. This is not part of the HSP personality trait.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why is there such a buzz around the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering why there\\u2019s suddenly so much talk around a term that\\u2019s been around for\\u00a0yonks, so are we. But according to Abrahams, there are a few reasons behind it \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got nothing to do with\\u00a0The\\u00a0White Lotus.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans love to categorise and put people in understandable boxes. We have done this forever by declaring someone is narcissistic or borderline or bipolar if we don\\u2019t understand or appreciate their behaviour,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the unqualified diagnosis and labelling someone HSP is similar, where we have deemed their behaviour as \\u2018too sensitive\\u2019 and clearly a failing of some sort.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And you know who\\u2019s sitting at the crux of it? You guessed it\\u2026<\\/p><p>\\u201cMillennials are often the target of this unprofessional diagnosis, with the notion that they have all been wrapped in cotton wool. Calling them HSPs implies they are a \\u2018snowflake\\u2019\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where they lack resilience and are more prone to taking offence. This does not recognise the gifts and limitations in combination that HSPs experience.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the term is being overused without understanding the impact the sensitivity has on the person,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How being a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 can impact your relationships.\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Relationships can be\\u00a0complicated AF \\u2013 no matter your personality type. But being a HSP and having this kind of deep emotional intelligence can heighten a lot of the usual nuances \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s with your friends, family or significant other.<\\/p><p>Below are some of the native impacts being a HSP can have on your relationships...<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional self-regulation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cEven though HSPs may have a high awareness of themselves and others\\u2019 emotional states, it does not mean that they can necessarily\\u00a0handle negative emotions inside of themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s usually absent is the regulation of emotions, with HSPs feeling overwhelmed at higher levels than others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen this happens, they can feel fear, anger, shame or sadness that they express impulsively in an outburst,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can lead to conflict with their partner who may feel attacked, shamed or blindsided by what their HSP partner saw.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For those who cannot self regulate this trait, it can end up being a case where you are able to be sensitive and aware of others, but unable to support your own wellbeing.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional challenges\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cHSPs take on the feelings of their partner and others which leaves them affected by changes of states in others. This can be difficult in a relationship; we all need to be able to\\u00a0have emotional variations in our day-to-day lives without something always \\u2018being wrong\\u2019 or needing attention brought to it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This might mean there\\u2019s way too much focus on everyone else around you, and not enough focus on yourself.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, Abrahams said HSPs often have emotional or interpersonal challenges in that they often want others to be more like them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst they may be aware and sensitive to others, they also feel upset when they feel others don\\u2019t meet their standards or feel sufficient reciprocation of similar care, thought about them,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt can feel lonely and there is often a large gap between how the HSP thinks about others and their needs versus what they receive in return.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can feel disappointed, anxious, depressed by this gap. Some can also be highly critical of those who fall short. As said previously, emotional awareness does not necessarily\\u00a0mean the HSP has the ability to regulate their emotions.\\u201d\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Restriction on one\\u2019s partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, HSPs often have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate TV shows where there is horror or for some even thrillers, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>Um. We feel\\u2026 seen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis means they create rules so that they do not become overwhelmed. In a relationship, a partner or family member will be restricted by the conditions imposed on them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>This might include restrictions on what TV shows or movies are acceptable. If you\\u2019re the kind of\\u00a0person who hides behind the sofa\\u00a0during a cringe-y movie or a thriller \\u2013 you know what we\\u2019re talking about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe problem when viewing is that HSPs never know when the tension or suspense will increase, and all of a sudden it becomes too much to handle.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same goes for music, with Abrahams saying that some HSPs may be able to\\u00a0tolerate rock or pop music yet unable to tolerate their partner\\u2019s jazz music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe partner may only feel free to\\u00a0listen to this when they are alone as they don\\u2019t want to impose the jazz on their partner and cause them to suffer.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17151,5097,'_thumbnail_id','5000'),(17152,5097,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17153,5097,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17154,5097,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17155,5098,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17156,5098,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17157,5098,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17158,5098,'_wp_page_template','default'),(17159,5098,'_elementor_data','[{\"id\":\"e854393\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"stretch_section\":\"section-stretched\",\"background_background\":\"classic\",\"background_image\":{\"url\":\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2022\\/07\\/shutterstock_706770283-1024x683-1.jpg\",\"id\":5000,\"alt\":\"\",\"source\":\"library\"},\"background_position\":\"initial\",\"background_repeat\":\"no-repeat\",\"background_size\":\"cover\",\"background_overlay_background\":\"classic\",\"background_overlay_color\":\"#000000\",\"background_overlay_opacity\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":0.409999999999999975575093458246556110680103302001953125,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_ypos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":-248,\"sizes\":[]},\"background_xpos\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":7,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"82bf9b1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d95d219\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":112,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"},{\"id\":\"ade2076\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"\",\"heading_text\":\"Mamam!a\",\"description_text\":\"\",\"heading_tag\":\"h1\",\"text_align\":\"center\",\"heading_color\":\"#FFFFFF\",\"heading_typography_typography\":\"custom\",\"heading_typography_font_size\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":60,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_font_size_mobile\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":40,\"sizes\":[]},\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":1.8000000000000000444089209850062616169452667236328125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"},{\"id\":\"a72ff32\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"space\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"size\":125,\"sizes\":[]}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"spacer\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"22aae0e\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"91\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b31baff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"f7c748c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"subheading_text\":\"Article - source: Mamamia\",\"heading_text\":\"13 signs you\\u2019re a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019, and what that means for your relationships\",\"description_text\":\"16 December 2021\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"cms_heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"dab5d10\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1fb5858\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3c137ff\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Whether you\\u2019ve watched\\u00a0The White Lotus\\u00a0or not (where have you been?!), you\\u2019re probably familiar with the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019. Yeah? It\\u2019s the diagnosis that\\u2019s popping up\\u00a0everywhere\\u00a0right now \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got tons of people suddenly identifying themselves as HSPs.<\\/p><p>But while it might seem like a new\\u00a0Gen Z\\u00a0kinda thing, HSP is actually a very real trait that means a lot more than just being \\u201ctoo sensitive\\u201d.<\\/p><p>If you\\u2019re a HSP, essentially you\\u2019ll have a heightened sensory system, meaning you\\u2019re increasingly sensitive to physical, emotional and social stimuli \\u2013 everything from sights to sounds and textures.<\\/p><p>In saying that, it\\u2019s nothing major to worry about \\u2013 so don\\u2019t freak out. Being a highly sensitive person doesn\\u2019t affect your health in any way (it\\u2019s a normal trait), and is actually often seen as something that is quite beneficial.<\\/p><p>However, there are some occasional disadvantages of feeling too much, too deep.<\\/p><p>Here, we asked psychotherapist\\u00a0Lissy Abrahams\\u00a0everything we need to know about HSPs \\u2013 and what kind of impact it might have on our relationships.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05d67e9\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"dddd653\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b97ba78\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What is a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 diagnosis?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"52c9ccf\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1f71192\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b6411ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Originally coined by researcher\\u00a0Dr Elaine Aron\\u00a0in the early 90s, HSP is not really a disorder or diagnosis.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is a personality trait which has a particular pattern of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are consistent and stable across one\\u2019s lifespan. Another example of a personality trait is introversion or extroversion,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt is not a disorder; it is a sensitivity, and its scientific name is Sensory-Processing Sensitivity. There is sensory processing disorder, which is a condition where the response to sensory input is impaired. For HSPs there is no impairment, however they have a stronger reaction than those without the sensitivity.\\u201d<\\/p><p>According to research by Dr Aron, HSP is completely normal and something that is found in 15 to 20 per cent of the population. Meaning? Around one in five people will be HSPs.<\\/p><p>So, chances are you either know one or you are one.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSP is innate and also evident in other species. Being HSPs may increase their chances of survival as HSPs observe and reflect on the subtleties of others before acting.\\u201d<\\/p><p>However, while HSPs might easily notice details and patterns that others miss, the drawback is that HSPs can get easily overwhelmed.<\\/p><p>Think of 15 people calling and texting you at the same time.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHSPs expend their energy noticing people and environmental stimuli. Therefore, they often withdraw to replenish their energy and calm down their nervous system,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey are often overstimulated and easily overwhelmed. This makes them sensitive to sounds or light or crowds.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"9736d49\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"722747a\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a008783\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"What are the signs of a highly sensitive person?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"08\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"926dd8b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7df8d29\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"fa21e62\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Okay, so how do you actually ~know~ if you\\u2019re on the HSP side of things? Well, according to Abrahams, there are 13 common symptoms that are related to HSP.<\\/p><p>However, it\\u2019s important to point out that not\\u00a0all\\u00a0of\\u00a0these will resonate with someone on the sensitivity spectrum, yeah?<\\/p><p>As per Abrahams, HSPs typically experience many of the below -<\\/p><ol><li>Easily overwhelmed by external stimuli (lights, strong smells and sounds).<\\/li><li>Easily overwhelmed by internal stimuli (thought, emotions and realisations).<\\/li><li>Higher empathy and awareness of other\\u2019s needs.<\\/li><li>Aversion to large groups or crowds.<\\/li><li>Rattled when they feel time pressured.<\\/li><li>Avoid violent movies and TV shows.<\\/li><li>Need alone time as can experience overwhelm, exhaustion and even burnout.<\\/li><li>Often withdraw to get relief into a private space.<\\/li><li>Arrange their lives to avoid situations where they will feel upset or overwhelmed.<\\/li><li>They notice or enjoy delicate scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art.<\\/li><li>They have a rich and complex inner life (intuition or creativity).<\\/li><li>Difficulty with transitions and changes.<\\/li><li>Were often sensitive or shy as a child.<\\/li><\\/ol>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"530415b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2293c5b\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0dd095c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Are empaths and highly sensitive persons linked?\\n\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"66c410b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aabb8dc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"cdb8620\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Well, not necessarily. While the two do share some common traits and crossovers, they also have a lot of differences, too.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe Dr Judith Orloff\\u2019s notion of an empathic spectrum describes the difference between HSPs and empaths well, and it is a matter of degrees of empathy that distinguish them,\\u201d explains Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou can imagine a spectrum moving from no empathy on the left of the spectrum (those who are deficient in empathy such as\\u00a0narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths) to normal loving, empathic people as you move along the spectrum, to HSPs and at the other end of the spectrum are empaths.\\u201d<\\/p><p>To give you an idea of what this might look like, here\\u2019s what the Empathic Spectrum looks like below -\\u00a0<\\/p><p><img class=\\\"alignnone wp-image-5096 size-large\\\" src=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/wp-content\\/uploads\\/2021\\/12\\/Empaths-HSPs-Linked-1024x141.png\\\" alt=\\\"\\\" width=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"88\\\" \\/><\\/p><p>Interesting!<\\/p><p>While empaths share all the traits of HSPs, Abrahams said the main difference is that \\u201cempaths take the empathic experience much further and absorb even more of the emotional energy or stimuli from others and the environment.\\u201d<\\/p><p>So, it\\u2019s kind of like an accelerated version of HSPs, where they\\u2019re wired to process other people\\u2019s feelings more intensely, effecting them in numerous ways.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI see empaths as being more porous than HSPs, as if they have less of an internal\\/external boundary\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where it is difficult to differentiate between what is my stuff and what is your stuff? It all becomes the empath\\u2019s stuff and they often cannot tell the difference as they internalise the feelings and pain of others.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cEmpaths differ from HSPs as many empaths feel intuitively connected within themselves, and to animals and nature. This is not part of the HSP personality trait.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"a3d42ea\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"96d007c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3855afa\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Why is there such a buzz around the term \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019?\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c87b820\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":{\"margin\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"0\",\"right\":0,\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":0,\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"a7daeee\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"35ba72b\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>If you\\u2019re wondering why there\\u2019s suddenly so much talk around a term that\\u2019s been around for\\u00a0yonks, so are we. But according to Abrahams, there are a few reasons behind it \\u2013 and it\\u2019s got nothing to do with\\u00a0The\\u00a0White Lotus.<\\/p><p>\\u201cHumans love to categorise and put people in understandable boxes. We have done this forever by declaring someone is narcissistic or borderline or bipolar if we don\\u2019t understand or appreciate their behaviour,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the unqualified diagnosis and labelling someone HSP is similar, where we have deemed their behaviour as \\u2018too sensitive\\u2019 and clearly a failing of some sort.\\u201d<\\/p><p>And you know who\\u2019s sitting at the crux of it? You guessed it\\u2026<\\/p><p>\\u201cMillennials are often the target of this unprofessional diagnosis, with the notion that they have all been wrapped in cotton wool. Calling them HSPs implies they are a \\u2018snowflake\\u2019\\u00a0\\u2013\\u00a0where they lack resilience and are more prone to taking offence. This does not recognise the gifts and limitations in combination that HSPs experience.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cI believe the term is being overused without understanding the impact the sensitivity has on the person,\\u201d adds Abrahams.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"05cd975\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4edf4ff\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"8509d59\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"How being a \\u2018highly sensitive person\\u2019 can impact your relationships.\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6c9418b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"032a2fe\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"16aeacf\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Relationships can be\\u00a0complicated AF \\u2013 no matter your personality type. But being a HSP and having this kind of deep emotional intelligence can heighten a lot of the usual nuances \\u2013 whether it\\u2019s with your friends, family or significant other.<\\/p><p>Below are some of the native impacts being a HSP can have on your relationships...<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"506888a\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6da8f1\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"594f5b9\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional self-regulation\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"6dc1f12\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"36507ba\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"3d858ec\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cEven though HSPs may have a high awareness of themselves and others\\u2019 emotional states, it does not mean that they can necessarily\\u00a0handle negative emotions inside of themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s usually absent is the regulation of emotions, with HSPs feeling overwhelmed at higher levels than others.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhen this happens, they can feel fear, anger, shame or sadness that they express impulsively in an outburst,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis can lead to conflict with their partner who may feel attacked, shamed or blindsided by what their HSP partner saw.\\u201d<\\/p><p>For those who cannot self regulate this trait, it can end up being a case where you are able to be sensitive and aware of others, but unable to support your own wellbeing.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"76b215b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"daea4aa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"b949088\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Emotional challenges\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"acbcc4d\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5783cb0\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"80c2e8f\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cHSPs take on the feelings of their partner and others which leaves them affected by changes of states in others. This can be difficult in a relationship; we all need to be able to\\u00a0have emotional variations in our day-to-day lives without something always \\u2018being wrong\\u2019 or needing attention brought to it,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>This might mean there\\u2019s way too much focus on everyone else around you, and not enough focus on yourself.<\\/p><p>What\\u2019s more, Abrahams said HSPs often have emotional or interpersonal challenges in that they often want others to be more like them.<\\/p><p>\\u201cWhilst they may be aware and sensitive to others, they also feel upset when they feel others don\\u2019t meet their standards or feel sufficient reciprocation of similar care, thought about them,\\u201d she said.<\\/p><p>\\u201cIt can feel lonely and there is often a large gap between how the HSP thinks about others and their needs versus what they receive in return.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThey can feel disappointed, anxious, depressed by this gap. Some can also be highly critical of those who fall short. As said previously, emotional awareness does not necessarily\\u00a0mean the HSP has the ability to regulate their emotions.\\u201d\\u00a0<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e0afa32\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"6de38bf\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"5ff3fb4\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"Restriction on one\\u2019s partner\",\"header_size\":\"h4\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"c9fc05b\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c9ac8f6\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"ef0d3bd\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, HSPs often have heightened startle responses which often prevents them being able to tolerate TV shows where there is horror or for some even thrillers, or certain styles or volume of music.<\\/p><p>Um. We feel\\u2026 seen.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis means they create rules so that they do not become overwhelmed. In a relationship, a partner or family member will be restricted by the conditions imposed on them.\\u201d<\\/p><p>This might include restrictions on what TV shows or movies are acceptable. If you\\u2019re the kind of\\u00a0person who hides behind the sofa\\u00a0during a cringe-y movie or a thriller \\u2013 you know what we\\u2019re talking about.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe problem when viewing is that HSPs never know when the tension or suspense will increase, and all of a sudden it becomes too much to handle.\\u201d<\\/p><p>The same goes for music, with Abrahams saying that some HSPs may be able to\\u00a0tolerate rock or pop music yet unable to tolerate their partner\\u2019s jazz music.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThe partner may only feel free to\\u00a0listen to this when they are alone as they don\\u2019t want to impose the jazz on their partner and cause them to suffer.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0293f29\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"9138caa\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"1ca07d1\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"9. Say thank you\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"f16d0f7\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"e9cd6fc\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"4f7b898\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p><em>Say iiiiit!<\\/em>\\u00a0Being nice to one another is seriously underrated, you guys. Not only does it show a massive sign of respect, but it also proves you appreciate them.<\\/p><p>It\\u2019s a simple thing to do, but it\\u2019s often one that\\u2019s the most forgotten.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThis one is huge. I see many partners become resentful and bitter as they feel unappreciated by their partners,\\u201d said Abrahams.<\\/p><p>\\u201cI tell my couples to play the \\u2018thank you game\\u2019 where for one week they thank each other for every single thing their partner does for them that\\u00a0they don\\u2019t have to do themselves.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Cute!<\\/p><p>\\u201cThank you for feeding the cat, putting out the washing, paying the bills, picking up food, doing the dishwasher, walking the dog, taking the kids to the dentist, or getting the shirts from the laundry.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cPartners are often shocked just how many things both of them are contributing in their shared lives. They feel closer and more appreciated when their many contributions have been acknowledged.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"e2e3195\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2bd3cd8\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"2b5019c\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"10. Remember you are both unique individuals\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"61c51ed\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"edb7df4\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"669ff7d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>According to Abrahams, another great way of deepening your relationship is to remember that both you and your partner are unique individuals.<\\/p><p>Like, remember when you first met? Both you and your partner had your own identities \\u2013 hobbies, friends, freedoms.<\\/p><p>\\u201cYou both chose each other and committed to this relationship. However, the biggest mistake that prevents relationships from deepening is when we feel we own our partner.\\u201d<\\/p><p>\\u201cWe can become quite controlling or even demanding. We both have hopes, dreams and desires for life. And our connection can deepen when we remember and respect their unique qualities exists.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"0135333\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"89b04b9\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"facd74e\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"11. Be curious\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"ba7bf83\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"7a7096c\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"aed594d\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>Let\\u2019s go back down memory lane, again. Remember when you first met your partner, and you found them interesting, funny, clever, and super sexy?\\u00a0Remember?!<\\/p><p>Gah! What a time.<\\/p><p>They had all these fancy life experiences we enjoyed, different friends and hobbies we didn\\u2019t know about \\u2013 things were\\u2026 exciting!<\\/p><p>When you\\u2019ve been in a relationship for a long time, it\\u2019s easy to lose sight of this.<\\/p><p>\\u201cMany of us believe we know our partners and lose curiosity about them. However, we are all altered by life and by our experiences in life,\\u201d said Abrams.<\\/p><p>She suggests keeping curious about your partner and how they are at this age and stage of life.<\\/p><p>\\u201cBeing curious about who they are will deepen the relationship as they will feel understood and respected by you.\\u201d<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"08a3988\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"c913a40\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"d6b2a02\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"title\":\"12. Relationships are a privilege\",\"header_size\":\"h3\",\"_padding\":{\"unit\":\"px\",\"top\":\"8\",\"right\":\"0\",\"bottom\":\"0\",\"left\":\"0\",\"isLinked\":false}},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"heading\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false},{\"id\":\"757aceb\",\"elType\":\"section\",\"settings\":[],\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"13284c2\",\"elType\":\"column\",\"settings\":{\"_column_size\":100,\"_inline_size\":null},\"elements\":[{\"id\":\"0ded9ad\",\"elType\":\"widget\",\"settings\":{\"editor\":\"<p>\\u201cAlways remember that it\\u2019s a privilege to be in a relationship and not a right. This can help you rise above what you may find problematic or irritating about them,\\u201d Abrahams said.<\\/p><p>Touch\\u00e9.<\\/p><p>\\u201cThere are many people who would love to be in a relationship, yet haven\\u2019t found someone to commit to. It will deepen your relationship if you remember that\\u00a0relationships are conditional, and they can end if partners don\\u2019t satisfy enough of the often unspoken conditions.\\u201d<\\/p><p>Looking for more tips on improving your communication with your partner? Check out Abrahams e-book,\\u00a0<a href=\\\"https:\\/\\/www.lissyabrahams.com\\/service\\/top-tips-for-improving-couple-communication\\/\\\"><strong>here<\\/strong><\\/a>.<\\/p>\"},\"elements\":[],\"widgetType\":\"text-editor\"}],\"isInner\":false}],\"isInner\":false}]'),(17160,5098,'_thumbnail_id','5000'),(17161,5098,'_elementor_page_assets','a:0:{}'),(17162,5098,'_elementor_pro_version','3.6.5'),(17163,5098,'_elementor_controls_usage','a:6:{s:6:\"spacer\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_spacer\";a:1:{s:5:\"space\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"cms_heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:2;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"title_section\";a:5:{s:15:\"subheading_text\";i:2;s:12:\"heading_text\";i:2;s:16:\"description_text\";i:2;s:11:\"heading_tag\";i:1;s:10:\"text_align\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:1:{s:21:\"section_style_heading\";a:4:{s:13:\"heading_color\";i:1;s:29:\"heading_typography_typography\";i:1;s:28:\"heading_typography_font_size\";i:1;s:33:\"heading_typography_letter_spacing\";i:1;}}}}s:6:\"column\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:12:\"_inline_size\";i:27;}}}}s:7:\"section\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:27;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:3:{s:6:\"layout\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_layout\";a:1:{s:15:\"stretch_section\";i:1;}}s:5:\"style\";a:2:{s:18:\"section_background\";a:7:{s:21:\"background_background\";i:1;s:16:\"background_image\";i:1;s:19:\"background_position\";i:1;s:17:\"background_repeat\";i:1;s:15:\"background_size\";i:1;s:15:\"background_ypos\";i:1;s:15:\"background_xpos\";i:1;}s:26:\"section_background_overlay\";a:3:{s:29:\"background_overlay_background\";i:1;s:24:\"background_overlay_color\";i:1;s:26:\"background_overlay_opacity\";i:1;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:16:\"section_advanced\";a:1:{s:6:\"margin\";i:2;}}}}s:11:\"text-editor\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:13;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:0;s:8:\"controls\";a:1:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:14:\"section_editor\";a:1:{s:6:\"editor\";i:13;}}}}s:7:\"heading\";a:3:{s:5:\"count\";i:12;s:15:\"control_percent\";i:1;s:8:\"controls\";a:2:{s:7:\"content\";a:1:{s:13:\"section_title\";a:2:{s:5:\"title\";i:12;s:11:\"header_size\";i:12;}}s:8:\"advanced\";a:1:{s:14:\"_section_style\";a:1:{s:8:\"_padding\";i:12;}}}}}'),(17164,5099,'_elementor_edit_mode','builder'),(17165,5099,'_elementor_template_type','wp-post'),(17166,5099,'_elementor_version','3.7.2'),(17167,5099,'_wp_page_template','default'),